Things that are long overdue...
...and aren't new chapters:
I'm moving.
Not sure when, exactly... my timeline in this case depends on other peoples'. Not far, I'm still going to be in Omaha. But I'll be getting out of the apartment that gave me so many problems the Christmas before last (yes, I'm still there. As I said: long overdue), getting out of apartments entirely for the time being... there are pros and cons to living in a managed property, but the cons press heavily on my mind after my experiences here.
I won't be living with my roommate of the past ten years. We've been through a lot together... enough for me to know that we probably shouldn't be living together, though it took some outside perspective to get me to see it. I'm not going to air the details out here. I am making an effort to be more open about my life, to a great degree with my friends and family and to a smaller degree with everybody who might happen to read my journal, but I don't really think anybody who happens to read my journal really needs to know this.
About openness: I've always treated my life like it's a plate of food and I'm a particularly fussy eater -- I get seriously squicked if different portions touch. Family, friends, love life, career... I wanted to keep all of these things separate, walled-off and with a really big fifth section that's just for me. That is a perfectly suitable plan... or would be, if the "career" portion didn't consist entirely of things done on freely accessible portions of the internet... if the ultimate goal is isolation and repression, but not otherwise. The prospect of a serious relationship with Jack* and his views on openness and communication
I've already taken one or two confident steps in the direction of my dreams, but apart from the whole writing thing (which is not a small thing) I haven't done much to make my life into the one I want to live. I'm on the cusp of my 30th birthday and while I can't say I've wasted the last decade, there are more areas in which I've remained in stasis since leaving school than ones in which I've made any progress, bold or not.
Don't get me wrong: I'm very proud of the progress I've made. It's just been in a very limited number of areas, and I've reached the point where I can't grow any further there without growing in other ways. A table needs more than one really long leg, you know?
It's a fairly lateral move in terms of living expenses. The actual move shouldn't cost any money. There will be things I need to replace eventually, but not immediately. Yeah, extra cash wouldn't hurt... I'm expecting that there will be unexpected expenses, but I don't think I have to rattle the tin cup here. The nature of the beast is that I get more money when I produce more, and for that reason alone I'm not worried about money.
(*Just to head off a Conversation We Won't Be Having: I've been in a slump for longer than I've been dating Jack, so there's no use blaming him. I'm no J.K. Rowling, folks.)
I'm moving.
Not sure when, exactly... my timeline in this case depends on other peoples'. Not far, I'm still going to be in Omaha. But I'll be getting out of the apartment that gave me so many problems the Christmas before last (yes, I'm still there. As I said: long overdue), getting out of apartments entirely for the time being... there are pros and cons to living in a managed property, but the cons press heavily on my mind after my experiences here.
I won't be living with my roommate of the past ten years. We've been through a lot together... enough for me to know that we probably shouldn't be living together, though it took some outside perspective to get me to see it. I'm not going to air the details out here. I am making an effort to be more open about my life, to a great degree with my friends and family and to a smaller degree with everybody who might happen to read my journal, but I don't really think anybody who happens to read my journal really needs to know this.
About openness: I've always treated my life like it's a plate of food and I'm a particularly fussy eater -- I get seriously squicked if different portions touch. Family, friends, love life, career... I wanted to keep all of these things separate, walled-off and with a really big fifth section that's just for me. That is a perfectly suitable plan... or would be, if the "career" portion didn't consist entirely of things done on freely accessible portions of the internet... if the ultimate goal is isolation and repression, but not otherwise. The prospect of a serious relationship with Jack* and his views on openness and communication
I've already taken one or two confident steps in the direction of my dreams, but apart from the whole writing thing (which is not a small thing) I haven't done much to make my life into the one I want to live. I'm on the cusp of my 30th birthday and while I can't say I've wasted the last decade, there are more areas in which I've remained in stasis since leaving school than ones in which I've made any progress, bold or not.
Don't get me wrong: I'm very proud of the progress I've made. It's just been in a very limited number of areas, and I've reached the point where I can't grow any further there without growing in other ways. A table needs more than one really long leg, you know?
It's a fairly lateral move in terms of living expenses. The actual move shouldn't cost any money. There will be things I need to replace eventually, but not immediately. Yeah, extra cash wouldn't hurt... I'm expecting that there will be unexpected expenses, but I don't think I have to rattle the tin cup here. The nature of the beast is that I get more money when I produce more, and for that reason alone I'm not worried about money.
(*Just to head off a Conversation We Won't Be Having: I've been in a slump for longer than I've been dating Jack, so there's no use blaming him. I'm no J.K. Rowling, folks.)