A Tender Touch
Rating: M
Warning: Talks of spanking, but doesn't happen.
Summary: Alex decides Olivia needs discipline, but ends up giving her something much different.
“What the hell were you thinking Detective?” Alex demanded as soon as Olivia strode into her office.
“I was thinking of saving a seven year old girl Counselor. Thought that’s what we signed up for; serve and protect and all that,” Olivia replied, anger obvious in her tone.
Alex took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes in frustration. “You know just as well as I do that there wasn’t enough evidence. His lawyer will state that he was singled out, which he was, and now he’s crying police brutality.”
Olivia shrugged and had a much too innocent look on her face. “He continued approaching after I announced myself. I thought he was going to attack me.”
“Sell the bullshit somewhere else Olivia,” Alex said testily. “He was walking out of his front door. And now he has seven stitches to back up the story.”
“Seven huh?” Olivia asked as she brought her thumb up to flick across her bottom lip. “Seems appropriate don’t you think?”
“God! Sometimes I just wish I could bend you over my knee,” Alex exclaimed. By the look on her face it was obviously something she hadn’t meant to let slip.
Fire flashed through Olivia’s eyes. “Is that what you think will help? Think bending me over your knee and spanking my pretty little ass will actually accomplish something? Teach me a thing or two?” She took a step closer as her eyes narrowed. “Well let me tell you something. It won’t do shit because it can’t do anything for what I see every single day, can’t do a damn thing for everything I’ve been through in my life. So you can light my ass up till your little heart’s content, but I’ll do the same damn thing the next time the need arises.”
The flash in Alex’s eyes conveyed her point: challenge accepted. “Be at my apartment tonight at seven.”
***
Olivia strode through the door as soon as it was opened. “You realize this is absolutely ridiculous right?” she asked as she turned back to Alex, taking off her jacket, the anger from earlier that day still evident in her demeanor.
Alex seemed to ignore Olivia’s tone and admission. “Second door on the right. Take off your pants and lay down on the bed.”
Olivia nodded her head slowly. “Alright, I’ll let you scratch your itch. But know I’ll do the same damn thing tomorrow if it means a little girl will be spending the night at home with her parents instead of on Warner’s slab.” With that, she turned and disappeared down the hallway.
Alex took a deep breath and sat on the couch. She knew Olivia was right: this was absolutely ridiculous, but she’d be lying if she said she had never thought of bending Olivia over her knee and spanking her a time or two, for discipline or just plain ol’ fun. Alex had spanked many a tough dyke in her day, broken them down then built them right back up to where they needed to be, but she somehow knew that this wouldn’t work with Olivia. Maybe it had to do with all of the violence she saw everyday; she didn’t know. Olivia could possibly like a good spanking just as much as Alex enjoyed giving one, but it wouldn’t accomplish what needed to be done now.
Fifteen minutes later, Alex took a deep breath as she rose from the couch and made her way towards her bedroom. She stopped in the doorway to study Olivia. She was surprised to find her lying comfortably with her hands folded behind her head and eyes closed even after the wait. Alex usually used the act of waiting as a way to make her partner think of what was about to happen and why, but Olivia appeared, for the first time since Alex had met her, not to have a care in the world.
Olivia lazily opened her eyes when she felt the compression of the mattress as Alex climbed onto the bed. They silently regarded each other. Alex could see the fire still flashing in Olivia’s eyes belying her easy demeanor. She could also see that she was the only one feeling any apprehension whatsoever, but then again she was the only one who knew that she had plans on changing the game.
Alex scooted up on the bed until her back was against the headboard and her legs were straight out in front of her. She motioned for Olivia to lie across her lap. Olivia shook her head as she moved to comply. “I cannot believe you’re going through with this. Just what do you think this will accomplish?”
“Maybe nothing. Maybe everything. We’ll just have to see.” Alex studied the bare legs of the detective. She wondered why she had never noticed the nice set of legs on Olivia before. They were long, tanned and muscular, absolutely perfect for Olivia’s body type. And her ass! She had definitely noticed the ass before. Alex gently squeezed it with one hand.
Alex noticed that Olivia didn’t tense or move a muscle at all when she raised her hand. When she brought it back down, it was only a hint of a touch, and only then did Olivia tense. She moved just her fingertips along the design of Olivia’s lace brief cut panties. She continued this, just lightly touching her, until Olivia sighed. “Would you just get started? I’ve got better shit to do than lay here all night helping you out with your little spanking fetish.”
Alex simply continued lightly moving her hand. “You know where the door is Detective. I’m not keeping you here. Can’t take the heat and all that.” Alex could practically feel Olivia’s eyes narrowing in annoyance. “And if you remember correctly, I only said I wanted you bent over my knee. I never mentioned the fact that I wanted to spank you once you were there.” Which of course she did, but not tonight.
She let her fingers dance across the patterns of the lace, keeping the touch as gentle as possible. She began moving the other hand that had been on the small of Olivia’s back just as lightly. “Take this off,” Alex whispered as she lightly fingered the bottom of Olivia’s shirt.
The quickness and emotion of Olivia’s refusal surprised Alex. She slowly let her fingers make their way underneath Olivia’s shirt and rubbed them across the small of her back, just above the black lace Olivia was wearing. “Alex,” Olivia growled out a warning, but Alex ignored her and let her fingers wander farther up.
Alex’s fingers came in contact with a scar and she mindlessly let her fingers follow it. She was surprised to find it much larger than she expected. She noticed Olivia’s head fall down to the bed in compliance or shame, Alex wasn’t sure. Alex slowly began pulling the shirt up Olivia’s back. Olivia released a deep breath before raising herself up on her forearms to help.
Alex couldn’t hold back the gasp once the shirt was completely off. There were scars all along Olivia’s back, some longer and deeper than others, but all of them easily visible. “Olivia,” she breathed out as she began lightly tracing them.
“Don’t,” Olivia ground out. “Don’t you dare fucking pity me.”
Alex continued lightly tracing the scars. “What happened Olivia?” she whispered.
“I broke a plate while I was doing the dishes when I was five. I brought home a B on my report card in the fifth grade. I broke one of her bottles against the wall when we were arguing one night when I was ten,” Olivia began listing things off each time Alex moved to a new scar. “I broke a vase when I was putting her to bed when I was thirteen. I whined about the fact I didn’t have a father to take to “Daddy Dad” at school. I bitched about the fact that she was a drunk when I was fourteen. That was the last time it happened. The next morning I told her if she did it again I’d leave. That was her greatest fear: that I’d leave her alone. Every time she reached for the belt after that, I’d remind her I’d walk if she touched me. She’d throw it down and go back to her bottle.”
Alex desperately tried to keep the tears that had welled up in her eye at bay, but knew she had lost the battle when the very first one escaped. She continued to gently and slowly move her hands as she tried to get the tears under control. Once she finally had, she maneuvered herself out from under Olivia and straddled her legs. She bent over and began placing light kisses across Olivia’s back.
So quickly Alex couldn’t hide her squeak of surprise, Olivia had them flipped over where she was lying across Alex breathing heavily. “I didn’t sign up for this shit,” she spat.
Alex quickly got over her surprise and wrapped her arms around Olivia, knowing that if she didn’t Olivia would quickly be gone. She again began stroking her back lightly, now not focusing only on the scars, but the entire back. “Maybe not, but it’s what you need,” she said staring directly into Olivia’s eyes that were showing an emotion Alex had never seen before. “You may be the strong, independent detective, but you need somebody to care for you. Somebody to love you like you’ve been denied before in your life.” Alex continued speaking in a quiet, soothing voice even after Olivia had closed her eyes and lowered her forehead to rest on Alex’s collarbone. “Because you deserve it Olivia. Tonight has given me an idea as to why you may think you don’t, but you’re the most deserving person I’ve ever met. Let me,” she whispered as she nuzzled Olivia’s hair. She moved a hand up to cup Olivia’s face and brought it back above hers.
When Olivia finally opened her eyes, there were tears in them. Alex could also see that she was about to deny everything. “Alex,” she breathed out.
“Shh,” Alex said. She was surprised to feel tears in her own eyes again. “Let me love you.”
She could see the moment Olivia decided to acquiesce. She had to fight down the elation this brought her, to be given such a gift as Olivia.
Alex reached for the clasp of Olivia’s bra and undid it before slowly rolling them over so that she was lying on top of Olivia. She threw the bra to the floor and remained still until Olivia opened her eyes. In them she saw hesitancy and fear, but also the smallest bit of hope. She swore to herself that by the end of the night there would be nothing in those eyes other than happiness and hope.
The first touch of their lips was as light as a whisper. Alex slowly made it deeper, gently brushing their tongues together trying to show every ounce of tenderness she felt towards Olivia. Throughout it all, she felt Olivia trying to resist. Felt it in the trembling of her muscled, the clenching of her fists in the sheets. At the point of release, Olivia let out what sounded like a strangled sob and moan combined.
Alex quickly moved up Olivia’s still humming body and took her in her arms as tears fell from Olivia’s eyes. She felt as if she shouldn’t have been surprised that Olivia would release her pain in silence.
Even after the tears ended, Alex continued holding Olivia and lightly stroked her stomach. “You’d be so easy to love,” Alex whispered, “if you’d only let me.”
Olivia closed her eyes and brought a hand up to run through her hair. “I don’t think I know how Alex.”
“Can’t you at least try?” Alex pleaded.
Olivia sighed and rolled them over so they were face to face. “Alex I have never had anyone offer me a pure love before. I wouldn’t know the first thing to do with it. It’s almost a certainty that I will fuck it up. And no matter how much I want to explore this with you, I won’t allow myself to hurt you Alex. Because no matter the outcome, I will most definitely hurt you. And I wouldn’t want you to hate me in the end, which you will more than likely end up doing. I don’t want to mess up what we already have Alex. Not when I’ve finally gotten to a point where I actually feel….” She paused and brought a hand up to lightly trace the features of Alex’s face before she continued speaking. “I know that I’m not an easy person to know Alex. I’m an extremely private person and I push away anyone who shows any interest at caring. But I’ve finally gotten to a point with you that I almost feel comfortable being myself. Please don’t ask me to sacrifice that.”
“I’m not going to push you into anything Olivia.” Alex brought her hand up and placed it over Olivia’s that was cupping her face. “But I’m not asking you to sacrifice anything Liv; I’m asking you to build on it, add to it.”
“Alex,” Olivia began to interrupt her but was quickly quieted by Alex’s placing her fingers against her lips.
“No. Wait. Just listen. Everyone has demons to fight with, some worse than others, and I know that you wrestle with yours more than most, but I want to help you fight them. Because I know that I could never hate you, and that you would be completely worth any pain you might cause. We would be worth it.”
“You are being extremely optimistic Alex. I’m just afraid the pain I bring you will far outweigh any pleasure,” Olivia whispered as she placed a kiss on Alex’s forehead.
Alex brought both of her hands up to cup Olivia’s face. “Then why don’t we just take it from day to day. See where it leads us.”
There was a long silence between them where they just lay together; studying each other’s features, trying to sear them to memory. “A day at a time? No extreme expectations?” Olivia finally asked.
Alex looked deep in Olivia’s eyes. In them was still fear, but she was pleased to see that the hope had built. “A day at a time,” she promised with a kiss.
Warning: Talks of spanking, but doesn't happen.
Summary: Alex decides Olivia needs discipline, but ends up giving her something much different.
“What the hell were you thinking Detective?” Alex demanded as soon as Olivia strode into her office.
“I was thinking of saving a seven year old girl Counselor. Thought that’s what we signed up for; serve and protect and all that,” Olivia replied, anger obvious in her tone.
Alex took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes in frustration. “You know just as well as I do that there wasn’t enough evidence. His lawyer will state that he was singled out, which he was, and now he’s crying police brutality.”
Olivia shrugged and had a much too innocent look on her face. “He continued approaching after I announced myself. I thought he was going to attack me.”
“Sell the bullshit somewhere else Olivia,” Alex said testily. “He was walking out of his front door. And now he has seven stitches to back up the story.”
“Seven huh?” Olivia asked as she brought her thumb up to flick across her bottom lip. “Seems appropriate don’t you think?”
“God! Sometimes I just wish I could bend you over my knee,” Alex exclaimed. By the look on her face it was obviously something she hadn’t meant to let slip.
Fire flashed through Olivia’s eyes. “Is that what you think will help? Think bending me over your knee and spanking my pretty little ass will actually accomplish something? Teach me a thing or two?” She took a step closer as her eyes narrowed. “Well let me tell you something. It won’t do shit because it can’t do anything for what I see every single day, can’t do a damn thing for everything I’ve been through in my life. So you can light my ass up till your little heart’s content, but I’ll do the same damn thing the next time the need arises.”
The flash in Alex’s eyes conveyed her point: challenge accepted. “Be at my apartment tonight at seven.”
***
Olivia strode through the door as soon as it was opened. “You realize this is absolutely ridiculous right?” she asked as she turned back to Alex, taking off her jacket, the anger from earlier that day still evident in her demeanor.
Alex seemed to ignore Olivia’s tone and admission. “Second door on the right. Take off your pants and lay down on the bed.”
Olivia nodded her head slowly. “Alright, I’ll let you scratch your itch. But know I’ll do the same damn thing tomorrow if it means a little girl will be spending the night at home with her parents instead of on Warner’s slab.” With that, she turned and disappeared down the hallway.
Alex took a deep breath and sat on the couch. She knew Olivia was right: this was absolutely ridiculous, but she’d be lying if she said she had never thought of bending Olivia over her knee and spanking her a time or two, for discipline or just plain ol’ fun. Alex had spanked many a tough dyke in her day, broken them down then built them right back up to where they needed to be, but she somehow knew that this wouldn’t work with Olivia. Maybe it had to do with all of the violence she saw everyday; she didn’t know. Olivia could possibly like a good spanking just as much as Alex enjoyed giving one, but it wouldn’t accomplish what needed to be done now.
Fifteen minutes later, Alex took a deep breath as she rose from the couch and made her way towards her bedroom. She stopped in the doorway to study Olivia. She was surprised to find her lying comfortably with her hands folded behind her head and eyes closed even after the wait. Alex usually used the act of waiting as a way to make her partner think of what was about to happen and why, but Olivia appeared, for the first time since Alex had met her, not to have a care in the world.
Olivia lazily opened her eyes when she felt the compression of the mattress as Alex climbed onto the bed. They silently regarded each other. Alex could see the fire still flashing in Olivia’s eyes belying her easy demeanor. She could also see that she was the only one feeling any apprehension whatsoever, but then again she was the only one who knew that she had plans on changing the game.
Alex scooted up on the bed until her back was against the headboard and her legs were straight out in front of her. She motioned for Olivia to lie across her lap. Olivia shook her head as she moved to comply. “I cannot believe you’re going through with this. Just what do you think this will accomplish?”
“Maybe nothing. Maybe everything. We’ll just have to see.” Alex studied the bare legs of the detective. She wondered why she had never noticed the nice set of legs on Olivia before. They were long, tanned and muscular, absolutely perfect for Olivia’s body type. And her ass! She had definitely noticed the ass before. Alex gently squeezed it with one hand.
Alex noticed that Olivia didn’t tense or move a muscle at all when she raised her hand. When she brought it back down, it was only a hint of a touch, and only then did Olivia tense. She moved just her fingertips along the design of Olivia’s lace brief cut panties. She continued this, just lightly touching her, until Olivia sighed. “Would you just get started? I’ve got better shit to do than lay here all night helping you out with your little spanking fetish.”
Alex simply continued lightly moving her hand. “You know where the door is Detective. I’m not keeping you here. Can’t take the heat and all that.” Alex could practically feel Olivia’s eyes narrowing in annoyance. “And if you remember correctly, I only said I wanted you bent over my knee. I never mentioned the fact that I wanted to spank you once you were there.” Which of course she did, but not tonight.
She let her fingers dance across the patterns of the lace, keeping the touch as gentle as possible. She began moving the other hand that had been on the small of Olivia’s back just as lightly. “Take this off,” Alex whispered as she lightly fingered the bottom of Olivia’s shirt.
The quickness and emotion of Olivia’s refusal surprised Alex. She slowly let her fingers make their way underneath Olivia’s shirt and rubbed them across the small of her back, just above the black lace Olivia was wearing. “Alex,” Olivia growled out a warning, but Alex ignored her and let her fingers wander farther up.
Alex’s fingers came in contact with a scar and she mindlessly let her fingers follow it. She was surprised to find it much larger than she expected. She noticed Olivia’s head fall down to the bed in compliance or shame, Alex wasn’t sure. Alex slowly began pulling the shirt up Olivia’s back. Olivia released a deep breath before raising herself up on her forearms to help.
Alex couldn’t hold back the gasp once the shirt was completely off. There were scars all along Olivia’s back, some longer and deeper than others, but all of them easily visible. “Olivia,” she breathed out as she began lightly tracing them.
“Don’t,” Olivia ground out. “Don’t you dare fucking pity me.”
Alex continued lightly tracing the scars. “What happened Olivia?” she whispered.
“I broke a plate while I was doing the dishes when I was five. I brought home a B on my report card in the fifth grade. I broke one of her bottles against the wall when we were arguing one night when I was ten,” Olivia began listing things off each time Alex moved to a new scar. “I broke a vase when I was putting her to bed when I was thirteen. I whined about the fact I didn’t have a father to take to “Daddy Dad” at school. I bitched about the fact that she was a drunk when I was fourteen. That was the last time it happened. The next morning I told her if she did it again I’d leave. That was her greatest fear: that I’d leave her alone. Every time she reached for the belt after that, I’d remind her I’d walk if she touched me. She’d throw it down and go back to her bottle.”
Alex desperately tried to keep the tears that had welled up in her eye at bay, but knew she had lost the battle when the very first one escaped. She continued to gently and slowly move her hands as she tried to get the tears under control. Once she finally had, she maneuvered herself out from under Olivia and straddled her legs. She bent over and began placing light kisses across Olivia’s back.
So quickly Alex couldn’t hide her squeak of surprise, Olivia had them flipped over where she was lying across Alex breathing heavily. “I didn’t sign up for this shit,” she spat.
Alex quickly got over her surprise and wrapped her arms around Olivia, knowing that if she didn’t Olivia would quickly be gone. She again began stroking her back lightly, now not focusing only on the scars, but the entire back. “Maybe not, but it’s what you need,” she said staring directly into Olivia’s eyes that were showing an emotion Alex had never seen before. “You may be the strong, independent detective, but you need somebody to care for you. Somebody to love you like you’ve been denied before in your life.” Alex continued speaking in a quiet, soothing voice even after Olivia had closed her eyes and lowered her forehead to rest on Alex’s collarbone. “Because you deserve it Olivia. Tonight has given me an idea as to why you may think you don’t, but you’re the most deserving person I’ve ever met. Let me,” she whispered as she nuzzled Olivia’s hair. She moved a hand up to cup Olivia’s face and brought it back above hers.
When Olivia finally opened her eyes, there were tears in them. Alex could also see that she was about to deny everything. “Alex,” she breathed out.
“Shh,” Alex said. She was surprised to feel tears in her own eyes again. “Let me love you.”
She could see the moment Olivia decided to acquiesce. She had to fight down the elation this brought her, to be given such a gift as Olivia.
Alex reached for the clasp of Olivia’s bra and undid it before slowly rolling them over so that she was lying on top of Olivia. She threw the bra to the floor and remained still until Olivia opened her eyes. In them she saw hesitancy and fear, but also the smallest bit of hope. She swore to herself that by the end of the night there would be nothing in those eyes other than happiness and hope.
The first touch of their lips was as light as a whisper. Alex slowly made it deeper, gently brushing their tongues together trying to show every ounce of tenderness she felt towards Olivia. Throughout it all, she felt Olivia trying to resist. Felt it in the trembling of her muscled, the clenching of her fists in the sheets. At the point of release, Olivia let out what sounded like a strangled sob and moan combined.
Alex quickly moved up Olivia’s still humming body and took her in her arms as tears fell from Olivia’s eyes. She felt as if she shouldn’t have been surprised that Olivia would release her pain in silence.
Even after the tears ended, Alex continued holding Olivia and lightly stroked her stomach. “You’d be so easy to love,” Alex whispered, “if you’d only let me.”
Olivia closed her eyes and brought a hand up to run through her hair. “I don’t think I know how Alex.”
“Can’t you at least try?” Alex pleaded.
Olivia sighed and rolled them over so they were face to face. “Alex I have never had anyone offer me a pure love before. I wouldn’t know the first thing to do with it. It’s almost a certainty that I will fuck it up. And no matter how much I want to explore this with you, I won’t allow myself to hurt you Alex. Because no matter the outcome, I will most definitely hurt you. And I wouldn’t want you to hate me in the end, which you will more than likely end up doing. I don’t want to mess up what we already have Alex. Not when I’ve finally gotten to a point where I actually feel….” She paused and brought a hand up to lightly trace the features of Alex’s face before she continued speaking. “I know that I’m not an easy person to know Alex. I’m an extremely private person and I push away anyone who shows any interest at caring. But I’ve finally gotten to a point with you that I almost feel comfortable being myself. Please don’t ask me to sacrifice that.”
“I’m not going to push you into anything Olivia.” Alex brought her hand up and placed it over Olivia’s that was cupping her face. “But I’m not asking you to sacrifice anything Liv; I’m asking you to build on it, add to it.”
“Alex,” Olivia began to interrupt her but was quickly quieted by Alex’s placing her fingers against her lips.
“No. Wait. Just listen. Everyone has demons to fight with, some worse than others, and I know that you wrestle with yours more than most, but I want to help you fight them. Because I know that I could never hate you, and that you would be completely worth any pain you might cause. We would be worth it.”
“You are being extremely optimistic Alex. I’m just afraid the pain I bring you will far outweigh any pleasure,” Olivia whispered as she placed a kiss on Alex’s forehead.
Alex brought both of her hands up to cup Olivia’s face. “Then why don’t we just take it from day to day. See where it leads us.”
There was a long silence between them where they just lay together; studying each other’s features, trying to sear them to memory. “A day at a time? No extreme expectations?” Olivia finally asked.
Alex looked deep in Olivia’s eyes. In them was still fear, but she was pleased to see that the hope had built. “A day at a time,” she promised with a kiss.