That's a nope from me.
I could never have kids. It's my firm believe you shouldn't have kids if you're not going to love them equally and unconditionally, a conclusion I came to after seeing all the people who have had permanent mental scars because they weren't their parents' favorite, or because they were disowned by a parent for being LGBT of some kind, or because they weren't the same religion as the parents.
By that metric, I couldn't have kids because I know for a fact I'm not capable of unconditional love. If the kid is well behaved, kind, and intelligent, I don't care if they're cis, trans, gay, straight, bi, autistic, allistic, mentally ill, mentally well, Christian, Muslim, pagan, or any other legitimate religion. I wouldn't care if they married outside their race or not. I wouldn't mind if they used drugs or not, and if the use of drugs became abuse I would help them get help.
But if they grew up to be bigots, cops, millionaire or billionaire thieves, Ayn Rand fans, conspiracy theorists, Republicans, fascists, Libertarians, or anarcho-capitalists, I would absolutely wonder where I went wrong as a parent and promptly disown them so thoroughly I would pretend to everyone that the offending child had never existed in the first place. Same if they raped someone or committed a hate crime.
If they murdered someone, it would depend on who and why. If I agreed with them that the person deserved to die, I would still love them, even as I turned them in. (No way I'm risking jail to help them move a body or whatever!) Though if the murder victim had been abusing them or someone they loved, I would try to get a lawyer for them to get them off on a self defense plea or whatever.
But if they just killed someone who didn't deserve it, I'd tell them to try to enjoy never being loved ever again! And also to consider themselves disowned.
So yeah. Despite having been raised by parents who love their kids equally and unconditionally, I myself am not capable of that. So I can't have kids because I would be a hypocrite if I did.
Well, that and the fact that I absolutely have zero tolerance for screaming kids. I have enough self control I wouldn't be a physical child abuser, but I can't be sure I wouldn't scream right back at them after a while, and if I ended up with a child that screamed as much as my sister used to, that kid would be up for adoption before it turned 1 years old. And since I don't want to fuck them up for life that way, (either being yelled at constantly, or rejection issues due to being abandoned by a birth parent), it's best I just not have kids at all. Probably a good thing I could never afford a kid anyway. This was cross-posted from https://alex-antonin.dreamwidth.org/324358.html
You can comment either here or there.
By that metric, I couldn't have kids because I know for a fact I'm not capable of unconditional love. If the kid is well behaved, kind, and intelligent, I don't care if they're cis, trans, gay, straight, bi, autistic, allistic, mentally ill, mentally well, Christian, Muslim, pagan, or any other legitimate religion. I wouldn't care if they married outside their race or not. I wouldn't mind if they used drugs or not, and if the use of drugs became abuse I would help them get help.
But if they grew up to be bigots, cops, millionaire or billionaire thieves, Ayn Rand fans, conspiracy theorists, Republicans, fascists, Libertarians, or anarcho-capitalists, I would absolutely wonder where I went wrong as a parent and promptly disown them so thoroughly I would pretend to everyone that the offending child had never existed in the first place. Same if they raped someone or committed a hate crime.
If they murdered someone, it would depend on who and why. If I agreed with them that the person deserved to die, I would still love them, even as I turned them in. (No way I'm risking jail to help them move a body or whatever!) Though if the murder victim had been abusing them or someone they loved, I would try to get a lawyer for them to get them off on a self defense plea or whatever.
But if they just killed someone who didn't deserve it, I'd tell them to try to enjoy never being loved ever again! And also to consider themselves disowned.
So yeah. Despite having been raised by parents who love their kids equally and unconditionally, I myself am not capable of that. So I can't have kids because I would be a hypocrite if I did.
Well, that and the fact that I absolutely have zero tolerance for screaming kids. I have enough self control I wouldn't be a physical child abuser, but I can't be sure I wouldn't scream right back at them after a while, and if I ended up with a child that screamed as much as my sister used to, that kid would be up for adoption before it turned 1 years old. And since I don't want to fuck them up for life that way, (either being yelled at constantly, or rejection issues due to being abandoned by a birth parent), it's best I just not have kids at all. Probably a good thing I could never afford a kid anyway. This was cross-posted from https://alex-antonin.dreamwidth.org/324358.html
You can comment either here or there.