if i had 3 wishes...

[alex86]

if i had 3 wishes i'd....

1. wish for someone who was more worried about me than anything else...someone who put me first...someone who wanted me to be happy and okay more than anything in the entire world...someone who treated me like i keep asking to be treated...

2. wish to have a really great birthday...

3. wish to be appreciated for everything...all the SHIT i put up with...all the excuses i put up with...everything i have to go through everyday....i would wish to NOT be blamed for all the problems that we have...to have someone else try to fix us...to have someone else make more of an effort for us than i do...

I'M SICK OF IT. I LOVE YOU. I WANT TO BE HAPPY WITH YOU.

BUT.

YOU HAVE TO MAKE ME HAPPY.
I CAN'T MAKE MYSELF HAPPY.

AND NO.

IT ISN'T MY FAULT THAT WE FIGHT.

AND NO.

IT ISN'T MY FAULT THAT WE DON'T GET TO SPEND TIME TOGETHER.

AND NO.

IT ISN'T MY FAULT THAT I'M SAD.
OR THAT I CRY.
OR THAT I'M NOT HAPPY.

AND FUCKING NO.

IT ISN'T MY JOB TO FIX IT ANYMORE.
IT'S YOUR'S.

SO.

I SUGGEST YOU FIX IT.
FIX ME.
FIX US.
SOON.
PREFERABLY NOW.

OR ELSE...

YOU'LL BE REALIZING...ONE DAY...

JUST WHAT YOU MISSED OUT ON.

I'M WONDERFUL.

I JUST DON'T KNOW IF YOU KNOW HOW WONDERFUL I COULD BE WITH YOU.

BECAUSE YOU WON'T LET ME BE WONDERFUL WITH YOU.

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I THINK YOU REALIZE.

AND BY ME STICKING WITH YOU THROUGH ALL THIS SHOULD BE ENOUGH...

ENOUGH FOR YOU TO MAKE THE BIGGEST EFFORT OF YOUR LIFE TO STAY WITH ME AND TO MAKE ME HAPPY.

I LOVE YOU.