Whining About Winter
**This is an old post moved over from my other blog. If you're reading from mobile it shows up as recent.**
The other day my mom came over for the expressed purpose of getting me out of the house.
I don't do well with winter. Montreal, where I live, does winter very hard. There is snow on the ground from December to March. It's icy and freezing fucking cold for most of it. My husband is the only one with a driver's license and he's been working ridiculous hours, so the car is off limits and I'm terrified of taking the baby out when it's too cold and being stranded somewhere. Never mind that since we moved below the tracks the only access to anywhere remotely interesting is an underpass with two sets of long, icy stairs.
My mom and I attempted the stairs together and managed it, but I can't imagine doing it on my own with a heavy stroller and a heavy bucket car seat and a heavy infant and ice and slipping and oh god.
Sometimes I'm not a particularly adventurous person.
So the baby and I have been stuck inside the house an embarrassing amount. I've gone absolutely stir crazy and am uninspired to do anything besides put my head down and survive until spring.
I watch too much tv. Cleaning is often the most exciting part of my day. Sometimes people come over, and I do talk to people otherwise, but I'm still here at home, inside.
I feel the worst for the poor baby, who is pale as the driven snow from lack of sunshine and must think this whole wide world thing is actually awfully small and has a pretty heavy cat-to-human ratio.
When my mom and I went out we stopped at a cafe. Kal could not contain himself looking at all the people. He LOVED it. I feel terrible for keeping him so cooped up but I honestly just don't know what to do. I could try wearing him when we go out instead of taking the stroller but I'm unpracticed at that, don't have the right outdoor gear for it and because he won't let his arms be tucked into the wrap he's top heavy and could topple out. AND DID I MENTION THE ICE? I've taken some bad spills on these sidewalks. I know my city. It's not made for walking in winter. It's especially not made for walking with young babies, I've discovered. So I'm just inside, all the time.
My butt actually hurts from sitting so much. If I watch one more minute of DVRed episodes of Say Yes to the Dress, I'll...no, never mind. I am never sick of Say Yes to the Dress.
But still! I want to take my baby to the park! I want to sit with him in cafes and write, I want to talk to people and join yoga groups and do a thousand other things. I'm waiting to start my life with a baby and not just sit day in an day out watching tv and playing with the same six toys, waiting to go to bed so I can get up and do it all again tomorrow.
I mean, if I was a single mom or had older kids you'd bet my butt I'd have to figure out how to get out. But that's not my situation, so that tiny bit of permission to not do the thing that's hard is enough for me to let myself get psyched out.
Winter is such a beast. I will really have to figure out how to conquer it because I can't do this again next year. If you're reading this, do you have any tricks for making winter more enjoyable, especially with a baby and no car?