Fifty Shades of Awful...a book review

[aleksiina_26]

Just before I begin this, I just want to state that all my opinions here are my own. No one has to agree with me on this, and please, don't take my words as holy scripture, I'm just saying what I think about the following works, but I encourage everyone to make their own opinions, no matter how much I tell you how something sucks. I'm just sharing

Comments

[aleksiina_26]

Eurgh! I'm more than mildly disgusted to even have finished it >_< And I find the fact that a fuckload of people find this piece of utter crap any good highly worrisome. What the hell are people taking away from this? Its so painfully bad, how can they even appreciate this stuff when anyone with half a brain would just toss it out the window. It baffles me how the average american housewife is so undereducated and illiterate that she would find this kind of stuff remotely good. I'm actually scared for the future of america's cultural heritage and completely mindfucked over this tbh.

I mean, how discouraging must it be for those actually talented writers out there trying to make it when they stumble on that kind of stuff. Its an insult not only to the erotica genre but to writing itself. When I found out there were two more books I just went "fuck it, I don't want to live on this planet anymore!" An the bdsm is so awful...its not that its hardcore at all, pretty fucking tame actually, but just thats it approached with such pedestrian, google-fuelled knowledge that it makes it painful to read for anyone with just a slight inclination for the lifestyle. That woman makes her dom refer to spanking as "hitting"! As in "I'm gonna hit you so hard." I recoiled in disgust. There is a huge, HUGE difference between spanking or flogging and just flat out hitting. Hitting someone involves unwarranted assault goddamnit! And the book is full of such nonsense.

As you can see you're not missing much. Twilight is blander than oatmeal and an ode to how you should submit to your abusive boyfriend's every whim or have absolutely no worth in life, and Fifty Shades is...*sigh* nearly the same thing but with horrible sex scenes and britishisms. Both fucking awful. The first person narrative could be alright if the character wasn't such a despicable nitwit -___- Reading the thoughts of someone you absolutely have no interest for is tedious at best, unbearable in this instance. The first person narrative is the hardest to pull off imho because it requires actual characterization skills, which that unfortunate "author" has none of.

Blergh, I wish people consumed less and used their brains more. It would give some decent authors a chance -___- Thanks for commenting my dear xoxo