well then..
Im sittin here at chuck and aarons..everyone is drunk and i couldnt even think about drinking after my night at canada. so many things are going through my head as im sittin here. Why am i thinkin of him?? I havent spoken to him forever and he hurt me so bad. I thought i was over him and i swore to myself that i would never feel how i feel right now again. I guess you cant control your feelings. Being around the people i have been latelty just really makes me think about me. Everyone has someone in thier life right now. I wonder when and why i havent. I feel as marvin was the only person who could have been the one to make me happy. And then i think of everyting he has done to me and ask why i had to fall in love with him and get nothing but a broken heart out of it. ANd then i think i might have been able to find someone to have fun with like i did with marvin and things went the complete opposite way. I believe in myself and never really have a low confidence in myself but right now as i think of everything i do. What is it about me that a guy just wants to be friends? I mean it doesnt bother me but deep down it tends too.