just a summer romance
I go outside at night, and without any special perceptiveness on my part it is clear that there is an uninterrupted wash of bug noises. There's crickets (or whatever) that I only hear a couple of, but there's also other things (too horrible to imagine) making high pitched EE EE EE noises continuously, so there is no division of time in which something disgusting I want to destroy is not vocalizing. How many of these things are there? The crickets make a distinct noise, but the other things are so incessant that it's impossible for me to hear patterns or even what direction they're coming from. Then there's all the buzzing droning noises that are so subtle and constant that I can't even register them. I get the impression that I'm surrounded by a volume of insect life that would give me a panic attack if I had to confront it visually instead of aurally.
I don't have much of a background in biology or entomology or anything, so all I can imagine is that these noises are about fucking. How does that work out? Do all of these sounds culminate in a sex act? If not, when do the monsters decide to call it a night? Do bugs even sleep? Is there anything in their shitty consciousness that registers disappointment when making a grating chirp every 1.5 seconds doesn't pay off? They don't even have brains! They go out every night and do this shit without even knowing what they're doing. Do they even know when they succeed? Do they fuck with the same ignorance and indifference that I've already concluded they court with? Do bugs fuck or is it like fish where they just fertilize eggs outside the body? I've seen butterflies and houseflies zooming around piggyback, so some of them must! And if sex isn't what this is about, why won't these things just shut up already? If it's territorial, I've got news for them: everything around our house is exactly the same and they're idiots.
And these are just the ones I hear right now. Who knows how many got started before I went outside and are already fucking? This whole time I've assumed it's the males making noises, so I have no idea what the females are doing. I only heard two crickets, so what's the deal on that? Are all the ladies taken? I know there's plenty of goddamn crickets around. In addition to the leaves and pine needles and berries that fall on my car so much that its actual factory color is obscured, I get little green crickets who jump in my window as soon as I roll it down, or cling impossibly to my windshield just to mock my pathetic inability to turn on the wipers and face their obliterated corpses for the rest of my drive. Are these the same motherfuckers I hear? And if I stayed out long enough, would I be able to hear some of them stop (in defeat or in disgusting unthinkable victory) and other ones start up? Have I misinterpreted everything, and are these the sounds of bugs who are already fucking?
I don't have much of a background in biology or entomology or anything, so all I can imagine is that these noises are about fucking. How does that work out? Do all of these sounds culminate in a sex act? If not, when do the monsters decide to call it a night? Do bugs even sleep? Is there anything in their shitty consciousness that registers disappointment when making a grating chirp every 1.5 seconds doesn't pay off? They don't even have brains! They go out every night and do this shit without even knowing what they're doing. Do they even know when they succeed? Do they fuck with the same ignorance and indifference that I've already concluded they court with? Do bugs fuck or is it like fish where they just fertilize eggs outside the body? I've seen butterflies and houseflies zooming around piggyback, so some of them must! And if sex isn't what this is about, why won't these things just shut up already? If it's territorial, I've got news for them: everything around our house is exactly the same and they're idiots.
And these are just the ones I hear right now. Who knows how many got started before I went outside and are already fucking? This whole time I've assumed it's the males making noises, so I have no idea what the females are doing. I only heard two crickets, so what's the deal on that? Are all the ladies taken? I know there's plenty of goddamn crickets around. In addition to the leaves and pine needles and berries that fall on my car so much that its actual factory color is obscured, I get little green crickets who jump in my window as soon as I roll it down, or cling impossibly to my windshield just to mock my pathetic inability to turn on the wipers and face their obliterated corpses for the rest of my drive. Are these the same motherfuckers I hear? And if I stayed out long enough, would I be able to hear some of them stop (in defeat or in disgusting unthinkable victory) and other ones start up? Have I misinterpreted everything, and are these the sounds of bugs who are already fucking?