(no subject)
parents, oh parents. just like everyone else on this rock, you have no idea the POWER you have in your every action. your every breath. just like everyone else, you fail to realize the importance, the responsibility, and the duty attached to your every fucking second of existence. not pushing your son/daughter to do something they don't want to do one day will lead to the utter lack of discipline the next. force too hard one day and it will lead to the utter destruction of the child's character later.
what seperates men/women from boys/girls? i'm sure there's an endless list of trials one has to successfully go through in order to become an adult, but i think it's simply recognizing what real responsibility is, and taking the full brunt of that responsibility on one's shoulders, without being a bitch about it. if you can do that, i think you're a man/woman. this is where my issue with responsibility arises. HOW much of our personalities, ourselves, can we give credit to nature, (genes) and how much can we credit to nuture, (upbringing)? from my experience, a very short 19 years on this planet, it seems to me that the nature aspect can be twisted in almost any direction, whereas the nuture bit is where it's at.
I, ME, Rashad, can't take responsibility for anything. i can't because i have morals. i can't because i have principles, and i can't because i don't want to. nothing in my realm of influence is worth touching. the act of becoming a man...in here, this country is impossible. how can i possibly become this thing that i know is a good and worthwhile goal to accomplish, when EVERYTHING involved in getting and maintaining it is, for the lack of a better word: TAINTED. i mean everything from teh automatic aspects of life, (paying taxes to a corrupt and EVIL government) to the daily routines, (getting up, going to class, learning = which only makes me more aware of how WRONG everything is). tainted.
what does this all mean? why is this happeneing? i have come to terms with god, religion, all of that. i have no more hatred in my heart for GOD or whatever it is that made us. i only hate my fellow people, human creeps, flesh + greed. thats all i see. if i wasn't so sure that i was a mistake, i'd hate my parents for not using contraceptives. it's more than obvious that none of them, (our parents) really thought about what they were doing, and what kind of misery they'd be pouring on to us, most of us who would if we really thought about it, would leave this fucking place, into non existance with less than a moments thought. this isn't self pitying, rant. this isn't anything but the truth, and you all know i'm right. THIS FUCKING PLACE SUCKS AND I WANT TO LEAVE. you are all to cowardly, or blind to agree with me...or maybe you're happy, and if you are i'm sorry..this isn't for you.
so i'm going to make another vow, (this is becoming a habit): i vow never to grow up and become part of the adult world. to do so would involve taking responsibility. to take responsibility and actively engage in the real world, we would be condoning the way it works, and i'm never going to do that. on behalf of the bastard generation, all of whom have parents but wish we didn't, i say:
fuck you adulthood.
what seperates men/women from boys/girls? i'm sure there's an endless list of trials one has to successfully go through in order to become an adult, but i think it's simply recognizing what real responsibility is, and taking the full brunt of that responsibility on one's shoulders, without being a bitch about it. if you can do that, i think you're a man/woman. this is where my issue with responsibility arises. HOW much of our personalities, ourselves, can we give credit to nature, (genes) and how much can we credit to nuture, (upbringing)? from my experience, a very short 19 years on this planet, it seems to me that the nature aspect can be twisted in almost any direction, whereas the nuture bit is where it's at.
I, ME, Rashad, can't take responsibility for anything. i can't because i have morals. i can't because i have principles, and i can't because i don't want to. nothing in my realm of influence is worth touching. the act of becoming a man...in here, this country is impossible. how can i possibly become this thing that i know is a good and worthwhile goal to accomplish, when EVERYTHING involved in getting and maintaining it is, for the lack of a better word: TAINTED. i mean everything from teh automatic aspects of life, (paying taxes to a corrupt and EVIL government) to the daily routines, (getting up, going to class, learning = which only makes me more aware of how WRONG everything is). tainted.
what does this all mean? why is this happeneing? i have come to terms with god, religion, all of that. i have no more hatred in my heart for GOD or whatever it is that made us. i only hate my fellow people, human creeps, flesh + greed. thats all i see. if i wasn't so sure that i was a mistake, i'd hate my parents for not using contraceptives. it's more than obvious that none of them, (our parents) really thought about what they were doing, and what kind of misery they'd be pouring on to us, most of us who would if we really thought about it, would leave this fucking place, into non existance with less than a moments thought. this isn't self pitying, rant. this isn't anything but the truth, and you all know i'm right. THIS FUCKING PLACE SUCKS AND I WANT TO LEAVE. you are all to cowardly, or blind to agree with me...or maybe you're happy, and if you are i'm sorry..this isn't for you.
so i'm going to make another vow, (this is becoming a habit): i vow never to grow up and become part of the adult world. to do so would involve taking responsibility. to take responsibility and actively engage in the real world, we would be condoning the way it works, and i'm never going to do that. on behalf of the bastard generation, all of whom have parents but wish we didn't, i say:
fuck you adulthood.