Boy Trouble and... ME!?
I am just feeling beyond frustrated, so I'm gonna rant on here...
It is no secret in the real world that I am not a people person. I have a phobia of being touched, standing in front of the class, failure, etc, as well as OCD. Plus, I'm just a naturally taciturn kinda person, and resultingly do not converse with my peers all that often, unless it's one of my three friends-- of which I only have lunch with one, one class during which I'm nowhere near her, and nothing but the phone for my best friend. And, overall, I'm just afraid of humanity in general-- the male side of that spectrum, in particular (if only because I was tormented throughout my childhood by boys more so than girls)
Overall, I am a very fearful, unsociable person
Which is why this situation makes absolutely no sense to me
His name is Adam
First he went after my twin sister. He sat behind her in Japanese, and they have zero hour together. Me and my twin are sophomores. He is a senior
He'd, like, flirt with her, and they texted 800... texts within 9 days. Constantly, he asked her in a text, "What kind of guys do you like?" and she replied every time, "I'm not interested in guys." Finally, he caught her in the stairwell before zero hour started, when the school's all but deserted, and tried to hug her. She wouldn't let him. He wouldn't let her leave the stairwell. Don't worry, folks, it turned out alright. She yelled at him to stop flirting and leave her alone-- and he did. Now, he doesn't even talk to her, much to her, not to mention my, relief. I've been worried this whole time, quite frankly. O.O He's frightening. I'm also scared of tall people, by the way, and he towers over little 5 ft 2 in me. And he was scaring my sister, too. So, we were all very relieved when that happened. A couple days before she yelled at him, Sensei gave us new seat assignments in Japanese, too, so that all worked out right well
For a time
Did I mention? There was a football game a couple weeks ago. Our friend Sarah, one of my three friends, is in the band and had to play for the game and all that. Adam asked my sister if she and I could go. -- Wait, both of us? He kept pestering me, asking again and again, "Why won't you go to the game?" I replied every single time, "I don't like crowds and I don't like noise", which basically summarizes a football game. Yet still he asked. And he pestered my sister about it in endless text messages. Finally, he realized there wasn't any hope in getting me to go, thank god! But he kept pestering my sister, as I said. So, she outright asked our parents, "Please forbid me from going to that game." Forbidding granted. My wonderful mother and father have been listening to us rant about this situation from the very start, and have been even more concerned than me (and I'm the definition of paranoid)
Which leads me to the very beginning
I'm not entirely sure when it started, but for our birthday, me and my sister got our first cell phones. My sister gave him her phone number-- she was giving it to all the people she's friendly with! And she was at least friendly with him, back before he started flirting with and harassing her. He asked for my number. I told him, "I haven't memorized it yet." Of course I memorized it. It's my freaking cell number!! And I ordered my sister not to give him my number under any circumstances. Thankfully, she complied, if only because of how deathly serious I was when I asked this of her
He has since asked her for my number many a time. She has not given it to him
To the now...
In the new seating assignments, my sister sits by the door next to Sarah, Michael, and Bill (the two boys of which ignore them, choosing to converse with their friends in the next group over). I was moved across the room from her in the middle group along the far wall. The seats are arranged in groups of four, and my group consists of Miranda and Alex (who are together) in front, me alone in back, and I couldn't be happier. Unfortunately... To my left is what I refer to as "Arianna's Group". That group consists of Arianna, who I humor, Sam, who I ignore, and... Adam. Adam's in the back of his group, alone, much like me. Sensei likes group work...
Which is, quite obviously, when he started getting serious about harassing me
In the mornings now, if he sees me on my way to zero hour (mine of which is at the opposite end of the campus), he says hi and tries to talk to me or walk up to me. I always make sure to have my earphones in at that time, even if I'm not actually listening to music, and ignore him, trudge on to class. Next time I see him is at lunch. I have to pass him to get to my table by the windows, where no one else sits but me, my sister, Ceresa (my other friend), and, now, the other Alex (he only recently joined the table group). Anyways, Adam always walks up to me and tries to, like, pat me on the shoulder or stop me to talk by grabbing my arm. Remember my mentioning earlier about fear of being touched? Yeah. That kicks in. I'll freak out, but this is my freaking out which consists of jerking away as if burned. No yelling. No cries. Nothing verbal or violent, if only the force with which I jerk away. And I ignore his cries of protest and continue my way to my table. He is well aware of my fear of being touched. Since he started sitting practically beside me, he's questioned me many a time as to why I react as such, and I always poignantly reply, "I have a fear of being touched." And I do! Whether it's Arianna trying to hug me when I cosplay as Yuuki or just an accidental brush in the crowded hallways-- I freak out!! It is quite literally everyone. Miranda tries to hug me, too, and I freak out. I accidentally walked into Alex once. Freakout. Yet he keeps asking me why I freak out everytime he tries to touch me
As I said. Sensei likes group work. All the other groups are an even four. Which leaves me with Adam
And the whole time he'll try to talk to me. He likes to go on and on about how his love (a girl named Selika) doesn't return his feelings, or what a "hard life" he's had. I outright tell him, "Good for you. I don't wanna hear about it," and read a book, totally ignoring him as he talks about it, anyways. Sensei then changed his tune-- thank god!!-- and decided he didn't want the same people pairing up every single time. Sarah swaps twins and pairs up with me lol, and Adam usually just sulks in his corner and does a three-person pair-up with Arianna or Sam and their partner. Good for him. I'm happy with Sarah
Earlier this week
Sensei decided he'd had enough of Keegan and Zach ignoring him (Keegan never shuts up), so he moved Zach next to me. Zach's a nice guy, but also very talkative. I ignore him for the most part and read my book, just like I do absolutely everyone else (it's my common curteousy to listen when someone's talking to me; I don't listen to Adam, anymore)
End of the period? Adam walks up and goes, "You like Zach, don't you?"
I was already scared of him. And I told my best friend, Emily, as much over the phone. She also has zero hour with him and my sister. Somehow I came up, and she told him I'm scared of him. Which is fine with me. I was kinda hoping that'd make him back off. Backfire! Now, he just goes on and on about how he's "not scary" and "Why are you scared of me?" every day, on and on. So I ignore him and read my book. I don't even wave hello to him, anymore, and I used to do that, 'cause I'll at least wave at anyone else who waves at me. This morning he practically yelled at me for it
But back to the topic. I sit next to a guy for a half hour-- and suddenly Adam's gettin' all territorial?? That is downright terrifying. He's like a fucking dog, if you'll excuse my language. I am also terrified of dogs, by the way. He's possessive! Of me! And I don't even talk to him! All I do is ignore and avoid him!! I already fear male-kind for this exact reason, even though no guy I've ever known as ever actually committed such a vile act. And Adam. just. did. I've actually had a nightmare about him advancing on me. Obviously, this's beyond serious, at least in my mind
Today, as I mentioned earlier, he yelled at me for not waving at him. I did my Oral Interview (test week), and then Adam was called up for his right after-- close call! I almost had to do my Oral Interview with him, but luckily got paired with Sarah *relieved sigh*
Adam finishes his interview and sits back down. I'm absorbed by the movie (we watch Japanese movies during test weeks), 'Kiki's Delivery Service', when suddenly-- Ow! He threw something at my head, and it hit my neck and it hurt. So I spun around at him and snapped, "What was that for!?" You know what he replied? A shrug and an "I dunno"
Next time, I'm gonna tell him, "Go to hell", rather than just glare, and return to the movie
Both me and my sister have informed our parents-- okay, mother, in particular-- of everything that's happened every step of the way. Since the very beginning. And with every escalation, their concern for us has grown
With today's incident, during which time my big sister was over, so she got to listen in, too, we made a decision. My big sister's gonna talk to her friend, who owes her a favor and is a senior, too. This friend probably knows Adam in some way. Meanwhile, either I or my sister is gonna find out Adam's last name. And I shall ask for a new seat
My mom also agreed to take action, by the way. If Adam doesn't back off with this, they'll go to the school themselves. Me and my sister will talk to Sensei about it. Something will be done
And this will not end up like when my big sister was sexually harassed as a high schooler, herself, and the principle told her "Boys will be boys." -_- You don't get away with that shit in today's world, and I will not have some asshole thinking-- thinking-- thinking anything at all!! I am not interested, and I have indicated as such every single step of the way! I didn't give him my number, I don't talk to him, I blatantly ignore him, I outright tell him I don't wanna hear it
I'm done. I. am. done.
This is sexual harassment, and I've had enough. Go to hell, Adam. Get a clue, back off, and go to hell, you selfrighteous asshole who tells me and my sister we're going to Hell for being Athiests-- and then still harasses us! Fuck off! Or I'll make you
*relieved sigh*
Ah, it's good to get that off my chest ^^' This's been goin' on since the beginning of the school year, and it's a lot to take. Especially for someone like me who's only ever been on one date and dumped the poor guy that same night because he held my hand (fear of being touched!!). I've no experience with boys, but I'm no insolent idiot. I know what flirting is. And I know that this is sexual harassment. And I know I have a right to tell someone, to do something, and to make him fuck off
I don't usually swear, but this whole ordeal has just got me so frustrated that I am!
... Sorry about ranting. It's a relief just to write it out, even knowing no one'll ever read this. I'm feeling... a lot better ^^ Honestly, still a bit queasy thinking about it, but a whole level better than beforehand. It's nice to just talk about your problems. *deep, relieved breaths* Yes. I feel much better now. I'm excited to ask for a new seat tomorrow. And I've got it planned out, too. First I'm gonna ask Sensei, "What's Adam's last name?" And then, "Thank you. Can I have a new seat?" Yep! It's a new day tomorrow, and I'm gonna make the best of it! ^^' I'm feeling very relieved