dont think you know
because you dont.
i went to the eye doctors today, dr. wingate. i already didnt like him, but i mean, he was good enough anyway. my eyes were getting wicked blurry, so i figured i better go have them checked out, to see if i still needed glasses.
So we get there blah blah blah, you know the usual. prepping up for everything. well the nurse is super nice but shes like 'and what is your blood sugar?' and i was like what the hell, you really want me to get it out and test? and she's like 'is it, good up and down....?' and so it turns out she wanted to know how they had been. and i was like 'hun, thats WAY more than one blood sugar....moron...
so the doctor comes in and he's like 'so how have you blood sugars been lately? have you tests today?' and im like 'what the hell is wrong with you people, yes, i tested myself today, 4 times already, idiot' (i didnt say this stuff, but i was definately thinking it)
so i was like 'well lately theyve been up and down a little but i noticed the blurriness 2-3 months ago so i dont think thats it'
of course he doesn't listen to me 'have you been testing these past 5 days?' and i hesitated because the question took me off guard. of course ive tested, jerk, about 7-8 timesa day no less. what is wrong with you. so i guess the hesitation made him think i hadnt and he was like 'whats the highest in the past 5 days?' and i wanted to say '170' just to piss him off, but of course, i had to be honest.
'390' and then he spazzes out as if thats my average for the past 6 months. hes like 'you gotta get it in control! thats why youre eyes are blurry yatta yatta yatta i like to pretend im smart but im really just a jerk who buys my own awards at ACMoores, fills them out and puts them on the walla as if ive actually won something'.
and this entire time hes going on about how careless it is to let my blood sugars get so bad. and im sitting there ready to cry like 'what the hell is WRONG with you, you have NO IDEA! my parents and i have been fighting these past couple weeks because we ARE trying to get into control' and i was ready to spazz, but i held my composure.
after that, i made sure i didnt fail the eye test. he was like 'well, youre 20/20' and i was like 'HAH! so i havent been taking care of myself, have i? you freaking jerk, let me shove it in your face a little more, just to avenge the fact that you belittled the hell my family has been through because of diabetes!'
i havent cried yet, but God knows i want to. when my mom and i were in the car my mom was starting to break down. he had been yelling at us as if we didnt know how freaking serious this was. as if he knows how hard it is.
at the end its like he suddenly realized, oh, maybe i pissed them off so he was like 'its hard! i know it is!' and i wanted to kick him in the shins. he has no idea how freaking hard it is. he talks about getting back into control as if its like flipping a switch.
im gunna break down soon, i know i am.
im over due for a break down anyway.
we're never gunna go see him again, my mom promised.
-csea
i went to the eye doctors today, dr. wingate. i already didnt like him, but i mean, he was good enough anyway. my eyes were getting wicked blurry, so i figured i better go have them checked out, to see if i still needed glasses.
So we get there blah blah blah, you know the usual. prepping up for everything. well the nurse is super nice but shes like 'and what is your blood sugar?' and i was like what the hell, you really want me to get it out and test? and she's like 'is it, good up and down....?' and so it turns out she wanted to know how they had been. and i was like 'hun, thats WAY more than one blood sugar....moron...
so the doctor comes in and he's like 'so how have you blood sugars been lately? have you tests today?' and im like 'what the hell is wrong with you people, yes, i tested myself today, 4 times already, idiot' (i didnt say this stuff, but i was definately thinking it)
so i was like 'well lately theyve been up and down a little but i noticed the blurriness 2-3 months ago so i dont think thats it'
of course he doesn't listen to me 'have you been testing these past 5 days?' and i hesitated because the question took me off guard. of course ive tested, jerk, about 7-8 timesa day no less. what is wrong with you. so i guess the hesitation made him think i hadnt and he was like 'whats the highest in the past 5 days?' and i wanted to say '170' just to piss him off, but of course, i had to be honest.
'390' and then he spazzes out as if thats my average for the past 6 months. hes like 'you gotta get it in control! thats why youre eyes are blurry yatta yatta yatta i like to pretend im smart but im really just a jerk who buys my own awards at ACMoores, fills them out and puts them on the walla as if ive actually won something'.
and this entire time hes going on about how careless it is to let my blood sugars get so bad. and im sitting there ready to cry like 'what the hell is WRONG with you, you have NO IDEA! my parents and i have been fighting these past couple weeks because we ARE trying to get into control' and i was ready to spazz, but i held my composure.
after that, i made sure i didnt fail the eye test. he was like 'well, youre 20/20' and i was like 'HAH! so i havent been taking care of myself, have i? you freaking jerk, let me shove it in your face a little more, just to avenge the fact that you belittled the hell my family has been through because of diabetes!'
i havent cried yet, but God knows i want to. when my mom and i were in the car my mom was starting to break down. he had been yelling at us as if we didnt know how freaking serious this was. as if he knows how hard it is.
at the end its like he suddenly realized, oh, maybe i pissed them off so he was like 'its hard! i know it is!' and i wanted to kick him in the shins. he has no idea how freaking hard it is. he talks about getting back into control as if its like flipping a switch.
im gunna break down soon, i know i am.
im over due for a break down anyway.
we're never gunna go see him again, my mom promised.
-csea