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May 23, 2004 21:32

well as you guys know, prom is tonight, infact its happening right now as i type. im not going cuz i couldnt find a date, then when i got home today i was talking to chelsea and she told me she wouldve went with me if i wouldve asked... great... why am i such a dumb ass? i dont know and will never know, its probably cuz my parents did pot and crack before i was born and probably when i was born too.

me and rob are starting a band!!! ive been best friends with him since fucking 6th grade, i miss the bastard, im gonna try to go to his college after senior year.

me and paige are talking again, im happy for that.

the other day i was watching vanilla sky and i got really really depressed, i havent been that down in like... since paige dumped me, and i couldnt take it anymore, i really wanted to die, i almost did cut, but i decided to see if they needed help at work and they did so i worked to get my mind off of things. and it helped. it really did. i know how people are always like "god dammit i dont want to go to work, fuck" trust me i know, im the same way, but when ur down like i was, it really helped me, like to me it was like very strong medicine or soemthing.

if you havent seen vanilla sky before, come over to my house or ill come over and we can watch it, i have it on dvd. its seriously like the best movie ever.

i really wish i had someone that i could like cuddle with, and go to the fair with. to light some candles and cuddle on my bed with soft music on and just nibble and kiss. i miss having that.

thats pretty much of whats going on with me right now.

<3
-matt
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