Dream (Chapter 6)
Title: Dream (Chapter 6)
Pairing: Junseung, slight Dooseob and Kiwoon (not so much on this chapter though)
Rating: PG
A/N: Wow, my last update was more than 6 months ago. I think most have forgotten about this eh? ^^
Where am I?
Everything seems dark and cold. I’m cold, Junhyung. I’m feeling so cold.
“Hyunseung!” I woke up hastily, a tarn of sweat soaked through my hair. Two nurses and a doctor were already beside Hyunseung. One of the nurses came rushing to me.
“I’m sorry but you have to get out”
I couldn’t say anything as she pushed me out of the room. I stood in the doorway, nervousness bubbling in my stomach as the sound of the machine kept ringing through my ears. It was making me sick and nauseous. I prayed hard that Hyunseung would be alright.
Please please please please…. Don’t let them take him away from me.
“Junhyung!”
I turned around to see Kikwang running towards me. I quickly grabbed hold on his coat.
“Kikwang, you need to help Hyunseung. He’s …. “
“I got him back!”
Both Kikwang and I turned around to see that Hyunseung was breathing again. His chest visibly moving up and down. The doctor and nurses breathed a sigh of relief. I let go of Kikwang’s coat and uttered a quick apology. He nodded and placed his hand on my shoulder, giving it a little squeeze for assurance.
“He’s stable for now. We’ll keep an eye on him. Kikwang, can I see you outside for a minute?”
All of them walked out from the room and one of the nurses closed the door. I staggered my way to Hyunseung’s hospital bed and immediately sat down beside him. Stroking his palm, I whispered words of encouragement to let him know that we all needed him to stay alive.
I needed him to be alive.
It was the first time that things went so wrong and truthfully, I was very much shaken by the ordeal. I felt like I had let Hyunseung down. I nearly lost him and I had the feeling that the next time we won’t be this lucky.
I left fleeting touches on his forehead and down to his cheek. I was about to snuggle against Hyunseung when Kikwang opened the door.
“Jun, come outside for a while. “
He held the door open till I was outside with him.
“Jun. I don’t know how to break this to you nicely but … “ Kikwang stopped and stared at his hands.
“Is this about Hyunseung?”
Kikwang nodded.
“He’s getting weaker. I’m - I’m not sure if he can make it. Things have taken a turn for the worse.”
Kikwang looked up to look at me in the eyes.
“it’s his heart. His heart is getting weaker. We’re giving him drugs to stimulate his heart muscles. As much as I believe in science and all that, I do believe that - that by giving him encouragement to live, he’ll be able to get through this.”
Kikwang smiled at me and tilted his head to one side.
“You know, I wouldn’t have known that you are a caring person if it wasn’t for Hyunseung.”
“Hey!” I snapped.
Kikwang chuckled but he instantly became solemn.
“I know you barely know Hyunseung but - but please try to help him in any way possible.”
I gave him a sad smile. Yes, it was true that I met Hyunseung under weird circumstances. I wouldn’t even consider it as I have met met him. It didn’t really matter now because I cared for him just as much. Although our meetings were short and brief, I guess you could say that we have bonded in a weird way.
“That, I can assure you.”
*******
“What? So, what are we going to do now? Oh my goodness!” Dongwoon was jumping up and down on his hospital bed.
“Dongwoon! Calm down! You are gonna get me killed by Kikwang if he sees you like this.” I tried to stop him from further injuring himself but he seemed to be quite a handful.
“My poor Hyunseung Hyung! I should have been there for him!”
“Dongwoon, stop it!”
“Junhyung Hyung! Do something!”
“Dongwoon!”
“DONGWOON! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
Both Dongwoon and I stopped what we were doing and turned to look at the source of that angry voice.
“Ki - Kikwang Hyung. I - I erm - I was - “
“Junhyung, why are you holding on so tightly to Dongwoon?” Kikwang said while tapping his feet.
I looked at where my hands were and I realized that I was practically tearing apart Dongwoon’s hospital gown. I quickly let go and shook my head.
“I wasn’t doing anything! He was -“
“KIKWANG HYUNG! HELP ME!” Dongwoon pry my hands off him and dashed towards Kikwang, which took Kikwang by surprised because both of them nearly fell down hard when Kikwang lost his balance.
“Dongwoon, please! Stay in bed!” Kikwang pushed Dongwoon gently to his bed.
“But - but I “
“Hush Dongwoon. You can tell me all about it while you are lying comfortably on your bed.” Kikwang tiptoed to pat Dongwoon’s head.
Dongwoon turned around reluctantly while mumbling that he wasn’t a small kid anymore. As soon as he got into his bed, Kikwang tucked him in.
“Hyung, please. I’m not tired yet.”
“You need more rest.”
“Hyung, Hyunseung Hyung needs our help!”
Kikwang sighed. “I know he does. We just need to pray hard and hope the medicines are working their wonders and - and to encourage him to stay strong.”
“Junhyung Hyung can help then, right Hyung?” Dongwoon looked at me and all of the sudden I was afraid. Afraid that I wouldn’t be able to bring you back.
Kikwang looked at me and he seemed worried.
“We’ll think of something. Right now, I want you to rest. I need to talk to Junhyung for a while, alright?”
Dongwoon seemed to sense that something wasn’t really right but he let it slide. Kikwang motioned me to follow him out of the room. Before leaving, I patted Dongwoon’s head, much to his distaste. Kikwang closed the door as soon as I was out.
“Junhyung, I know that I told you to help Hyunseung as much as you can but now that I really think about it, I’m not sure if I want you to be too involved.”
“What do you mean?” I frowned because I didn’t think that there would a problem with that.
“These - these dreams and whatnot, I don’t think this is a good idea. I don’t feel comfortable that you immerse yourself too much into this - this thing.”
“You told me to help him out!”
“I know I did but - but I just”
“You just what?”
Kikwang flinched. I was angry. Confused. Frustrated. I stared at him and he looked back at me with his eye wide open.
“I -I just - Hyung”
I’ve never seen Kikwang stuttered this bad before. It made me feel bad.
“Look Kikwang. Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. Just forget it, alright?”
Kikwang shook his head. “I’m just worried about you. I don’t want you to hurt yourself or get into trouble.”
I walked towards Kikwang and gave him a hug. “Don’t worry Kikwang. I’ll know what to do.”
Kikwang hugged back. “I sure hope you do Junhyung.”
*******
I bid Dongwoon farewell and walked back to Hyunseung’s room. I stared at his pale face, at his frail frame and I couldn’t help but felt sorry. I touched his left cheek. He felt cold. I wanted to look upon his eyes again. Such beautiful eyes. I wanted to be with him not in our dreams but like this. Here. Reality. The next time we met, it might be our last.
*******
I walked into my apartment solemnly. I looked around the living hall for the first time in years and I realized that I have not been living my life as I thought I should be. Years of working had made me forget the path that I dreamt of when I was younger. In a way, meeting Hyunseung has changed all that. I have not felt such excitement, such want towards something or someone for a long, long time.
I stared at my fingers. It felt just so right to be holding, touching Hyunseung. I smiled to myself. It was time to get back what was mine. I found him - or should it be the other way around. I guess it was my turn now to find him.
I lied down on my bed. However, I was wide awake and I got tired of waiting for sleep to find me. I looked at my clock and it seemed that half an hour has passed. Sitting upright, I came up with a thought. My eyes transfixed on the tiny shelf in the bathroom. It took me a full whole minute to comprehend what I was about to do but my body moved on its own accord. Before I knew it, I was swallowing five of the sleeping pills. I was calm; I wasn’t even shocked of what I was doing. I stood in the bathroom for a little while, waiting for the pills to take its’ effect. I looked into the mirror and noticed immediately that my eyes looked different. My eyes were less - less dull I would say. I pushed my hair back and placed both of my hands on the sides of the sink. My head was getting light-headed. Dragging my feet, I walked back to my bed and I was asleep the moment my head hit the pillow.
********
I opened my eyes and it was pitched dark. I looked to my left and right but I could see nothing amidst the darkness.
“Hello?”
No answer.
“Hyunseung, are you here?”
Silence reigned.
I felt uncomfortable and cold. I felt the need to find Hyunseung fast. I quickly stood up and started walking while flailing my arms.
Tap
I swirled to my back at the source of the sound.
“Hello?”
Silence greeted me once again. My heart began to beat faster as my whole concentration was focused on determining the source of the sound.
“Hyun - Seung?”
I swallowed my saliva. The silence was deafening. I turned back around to continue forward.
Tap
“Who’s there? C - Come forward!”
Immediately after that, everything lit up. I squint my eyes to get used to the brightness. As soon as I was able to, I tried to find out where I actually was.
“Boo.”
I screamed and recoiled when I felt someone breathing down my neck.
“Hi!” He waved at me while giving me a sly smile.
“Who - who are you?” I pointed a finger at him.
“Hmmm…guess!” He disappeared in front of me and all of the sudden he was standing behind me.
“You smell nice. Perhaps that is why he is attracted to you. I wonder though what he - “
“Where is he? Where is Hyunseung?”
“My, my. So impatient.”
“Did you do anything to him?” I wasn’t afraid of this guy anymore. I just wanted the truth.
This guy had piercing eyes and a devilish smile. They looked cold and evil. He was taller than me and he was dressed in black.
“I can help you to help him.” He smiled till his teeth were showing. I didn’t like it at all.
“Are you willing to anything to help him?” I nodded. I came this far and I wasn’t about to quit.
He seemed please and kept humming to himself.
“Very well. I’ll make you a deal.”
I frowned. “What kind of deal?”
He chuckled. “I really like you Junhyung! You are so straight forward.”
This guy knew my name. I was pretty sure that he was someone dangerous. Someone I shouldn’t mess with but if he was the only person who could save Hyunseung then I would rather take my chances with him than wandering around aimlessly.
“You see -“ He continued talking. “ I was suppose to take Hyunseung together with me today. I can’t leave this place empty handed. So - “ He looked deep into my eyes. “ Why don’t I take you instead, eh? You seem delicious enough.” He licked his lips.
Honestly, I was very much afraid of this guy but I couldn’t think of any other way to help Hyunseung. I ignored Kikwang’s warning which was ringing in my head.
“You - you mean I’m taking over his place right? You’ll take me and leave him alone, right?” I needed assurance. I needed to be sure that Hyunseung would be out of harm’s way.
The guy just hummed and tilted his head. I was beginning to think that it was a bad idea when I heard it. I heard his voice.
Junhyung!
I looked to my left and right.
“Hyunseung! Are you here?”
Beside me, the guy made a ‘tsk’ sound and his expression changed.
Junhyung!
“Hyunseung!”
“Hey you, made up your mind yet? What say you huh? Deal?”
I pushed him away. “ No! I’m going to find Hyunseung myself!”
I started to run the opposite way and tried to go as far as possible from the guy. I knew I ran a lot but no matter how hard I ran, the guy was still behind me and it didn’t seem like he ran at all. I cursed loudly when he appeared in front of me again.
“I’m bored of this game. No one says no to me.”
He grabbed my neck and everything started to fall apart.
Pairing: Junseung, slight Dooseob and Kiwoon (not so much on this chapter though)
Rating: PG
A/N: Wow, my last update was more than 6 months ago. I think most have forgotten about this eh? ^^
Where am I?
Everything seems dark and cold. I’m cold, Junhyung. I’m feeling so cold.
“Hyunseung!” I woke up hastily, a tarn of sweat soaked through my hair. Two nurses and a doctor were already beside Hyunseung. One of the nurses came rushing to me.
“I’m sorry but you have to get out”
I couldn’t say anything as she pushed me out of the room. I stood in the doorway, nervousness bubbling in my stomach as the sound of the machine kept ringing through my ears. It was making me sick and nauseous. I prayed hard that Hyunseung would be alright.
Please please please please…. Don’t let them take him away from me.
“Junhyung!”
I turned around to see Kikwang running towards me. I quickly grabbed hold on his coat.
“Kikwang, you need to help Hyunseung. He’s …. “
“I got him back!”
Both Kikwang and I turned around to see that Hyunseung was breathing again. His chest visibly moving up and down. The doctor and nurses breathed a sigh of relief. I let go of Kikwang’s coat and uttered a quick apology. He nodded and placed his hand on my shoulder, giving it a little squeeze for assurance.
“He’s stable for now. We’ll keep an eye on him. Kikwang, can I see you outside for a minute?”
All of them walked out from the room and one of the nurses closed the door. I staggered my way to Hyunseung’s hospital bed and immediately sat down beside him. Stroking his palm, I whispered words of encouragement to let him know that we all needed him to stay alive.
I needed him to be alive.
It was the first time that things went so wrong and truthfully, I was very much shaken by the ordeal. I felt like I had let Hyunseung down. I nearly lost him and I had the feeling that the next time we won’t be this lucky.
I left fleeting touches on his forehead and down to his cheek. I was about to snuggle against Hyunseung when Kikwang opened the door.
“Jun, come outside for a while. “
He held the door open till I was outside with him.
“Jun. I don’t know how to break this to you nicely but … “ Kikwang stopped and stared at his hands.
“Is this about Hyunseung?”
Kikwang nodded.
“He’s getting weaker. I’m - I’m not sure if he can make it. Things have taken a turn for the worse.”
Kikwang looked up to look at me in the eyes.
“it’s his heart. His heart is getting weaker. We’re giving him drugs to stimulate his heart muscles. As much as I believe in science and all that, I do believe that - that by giving him encouragement to live, he’ll be able to get through this.”
Kikwang smiled at me and tilted his head to one side.
“You know, I wouldn’t have known that you are a caring person if it wasn’t for Hyunseung.”
“Hey!” I snapped.
Kikwang chuckled but he instantly became solemn.
“I know you barely know Hyunseung but - but please try to help him in any way possible.”
I gave him a sad smile. Yes, it was true that I met Hyunseung under weird circumstances. I wouldn’t even consider it as I have met met him. It didn’t really matter now because I cared for him just as much. Although our meetings were short and brief, I guess you could say that we have bonded in a weird way.
“That, I can assure you.”
*******
“What? So, what are we going to do now? Oh my goodness!” Dongwoon was jumping up and down on his hospital bed.
“Dongwoon! Calm down! You are gonna get me killed by Kikwang if he sees you like this.” I tried to stop him from further injuring himself but he seemed to be quite a handful.
“My poor Hyunseung Hyung! I should have been there for him!”
“Dongwoon, stop it!”
“Junhyung Hyung! Do something!”
“Dongwoon!”
“DONGWOON! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
Both Dongwoon and I stopped what we were doing and turned to look at the source of that angry voice.
“Ki - Kikwang Hyung. I - I erm - I was - “
“Junhyung, why are you holding on so tightly to Dongwoon?” Kikwang said while tapping his feet.
I looked at where my hands were and I realized that I was practically tearing apart Dongwoon’s hospital gown. I quickly let go and shook my head.
“I wasn’t doing anything! He was -“
“KIKWANG HYUNG! HELP ME!” Dongwoon pry my hands off him and dashed towards Kikwang, which took Kikwang by surprised because both of them nearly fell down hard when Kikwang lost his balance.
“Dongwoon, please! Stay in bed!” Kikwang pushed Dongwoon gently to his bed.
“But - but I “
“Hush Dongwoon. You can tell me all about it while you are lying comfortably on your bed.” Kikwang tiptoed to pat Dongwoon’s head.
Dongwoon turned around reluctantly while mumbling that he wasn’t a small kid anymore. As soon as he got into his bed, Kikwang tucked him in.
“Hyung, please. I’m not tired yet.”
“You need more rest.”
“Hyung, Hyunseung Hyung needs our help!”
Kikwang sighed. “I know he does. We just need to pray hard and hope the medicines are working their wonders and - and to encourage him to stay strong.”
“Junhyung Hyung can help then, right Hyung?” Dongwoon looked at me and all of the sudden I was afraid. Afraid that I wouldn’t be able to bring you back.
Kikwang looked at me and he seemed worried.
“We’ll think of something. Right now, I want you to rest. I need to talk to Junhyung for a while, alright?”
Dongwoon seemed to sense that something wasn’t really right but he let it slide. Kikwang motioned me to follow him out of the room. Before leaving, I patted Dongwoon’s head, much to his distaste. Kikwang closed the door as soon as I was out.
“Junhyung, I know that I told you to help Hyunseung as much as you can but now that I really think about it, I’m not sure if I want you to be too involved.”
“What do you mean?” I frowned because I didn’t think that there would a problem with that.
“These - these dreams and whatnot, I don’t think this is a good idea. I don’t feel comfortable that you immerse yourself too much into this - this thing.”
“You told me to help him out!”
“I know I did but - but I just”
“You just what?”
Kikwang flinched. I was angry. Confused. Frustrated. I stared at him and he looked back at me with his eye wide open.
“I -I just - Hyung”
I’ve never seen Kikwang stuttered this bad before. It made me feel bad.
“Look Kikwang. Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. Just forget it, alright?”
Kikwang shook his head. “I’m just worried about you. I don’t want you to hurt yourself or get into trouble.”
I walked towards Kikwang and gave him a hug. “Don’t worry Kikwang. I’ll know what to do.”
Kikwang hugged back. “I sure hope you do Junhyung.”
*******
I bid Dongwoon farewell and walked back to Hyunseung’s room. I stared at his pale face, at his frail frame and I couldn’t help but felt sorry. I touched his left cheek. He felt cold. I wanted to look upon his eyes again. Such beautiful eyes. I wanted to be with him not in our dreams but like this. Here. Reality. The next time we met, it might be our last.
*******
I walked into my apartment solemnly. I looked around the living hall for the first time in years and I realized that I have not been living my life as I thought I should be. Years of working had made me forget the path that I dreamt of when I was younger. In a way, meeting Hyunseung has changed all that. I have not felt such excitement, such want towards something or someone for a long, long time.
I stared at my fingers. It felt just so right to be holding, touching Hyunseung. I smiled to myself. It was time to get back what was mine. I found him - or should it be the other way around. I guess it was my turn now to find him.
I lied down on my bed. However, I was wide awake and I got tired of waiting for sleep to find me. I looked at my clock and it seemed that half an hour has passed. Sitting upright, I came up with a thought. My eyes transfixed on the tiny shelf in the bathroom. It took me a full whole minute to comprehend what I was about to do but my body moved on its own accord. Before I knew it, I was swallowing five of the sleeping pills. I was calm; I wasn’t even shocked of what I was doing. I stood in the bathroom for a little while, waiting for the pills to take its’ effect. I looked into the mirror and noticed immediately that my eyes looked different. My eyes were less - less dull I would say. I pushed my hair back and placed both of my hands on the sides of the sink. My head was getting light-headed. Dragging my feet, I walked back to my bed and I was asleep the moment my head hit the pillow.
********
I opened my eyes and it was pitched dark. I looked to my left and right but I could see nothing amidst the darkness.
“Hello?”
No answer.
“Hyunseung, are you here?”
Silence reigned.
I felt uncomfortable and cold. I felt the need to find Hyunseung fast. I quickly stood up and started walking while flailing my arms.
Tap
I swirled to my back at the source of the sound.
“Hello?”
Silence greeted me once again. My heart began to beat faster as my whole concentration was focused on determining the source of the sound.
“Hyun - Seung?”
I swallowed my saliva. The silence was deafening. I turned back around to continue forward.
Tap
“Who’s there? C - Come forward!”
Immediately after that, everything lit up. I squint my eyes to get used to the brightness. As soon as I was able to, I tried to find out where I actually was.
“Boo.”
I screamed and recoiled when I felt someone breathing down my neck.
“Hi!” He waved at me while giving me a sly smile.
“Who - who are you?” I pointed a finger at him.
“Hmmm…guess!” He disappeared in front of me and all of the sudden he was standing behind me.
“You smell nice. Perhaps that is why he is attracted to you. I wonder though what he - “
“Where is he? Where is Hyunseung?”
“My, my. So impatient.”
“Did you do anything to him?” I wasn’t afraid of this guy anymore. I just wanted the truth.
This guy had piercing eyes and a devilish smile. They looked cold and evil. He was taller than me and he was dressed in black.
“I can help you to help him.” He smiled till his teeth were showing. I didn’t like it at all.
“Are you willing to anything to help him?” I nodded. I came this far and I wasn’t about to quit.
He seemed please and kept humming to himself.
“Very well. I’ll make you a deal.”
I frowned. “What kind of deal?”
He chuckled. “I really like you Junhyung! You are so straight forward.”
This guy knew my name. I was pretty sure that he was someone dangerous. Someone I shouldn’t mess with but if he was the only person who could save Hyunseung then I would rather take my chances with him than wandering around aimlessly.
“You see -“ He continued talking. “ I was suppose to take Hyunseung together with me today. I can’t leave this place empty handed. So - “ He looked deep into my eyes. “ Why don’t I take you instead, eh? You seem delicious enough.” He licked his lips.
Honestly, I was very much afraid of this guy but I couldn’t think of any other way to help Hyunseung. I ignored Kikwang’s warning which was ringing in my head.
“You - you mean I’m taking over his place right? You’ll take me and leave him alone, right?” I needed assurance. I needed to be sure that Hyunseung would be out of harm’s way.
The guy just hummed and tilted his head. I was beginning to think that it was a bad idea when I heard it. I heard his voice.
Junhyung!
I looked to my left and right.
“Hyunseung! Are you here?”
Beside me, the guy made a ‘tsk’ sound and his expression changed.
Junhyung!
“Hyunseung!”
“Hey you, made up your mind yet? What say you huh? Deal?”
I pushed him away. “ No! I’m going to find Hyunseung myself!”
I started to run the opposite way and tried to go as far as possible from the guy. I knew I ran a lot but no matter how hard I ran, the guy was still behind me and it didn’t seem like he ran at all. I cursed loudly when he appeared in front of me again.
“I’m bored of this game. No one says no to me.”
He grabbed my neck and everything started to fall apart.