Phoenix
I love my job. I am so very glad I made the decision I made. I feel so much lighter and free...like I can grow again and work towards who I want to be. I just have had such an awesome experience this year, in this district, with this staff... I am really busy, thus the reduced entries, but I'm busy figuring out how to make learning fun and taking care of the things to make life easier; the things I should be doing. And when I come home I am usually free to do what I need to do for my life. The work/life balance is such an important thing and I am so grateful to work for a place that believes that.
I mean, they expect you to focus and be on it when you are there and give 110%, but they get that you need play too. I don't know how to describe it; it's like feeling something changing inside you and starting to come out again. Something that was ridiculed and tossed aside so many times before and is now being recognized and valued, and the risk to come out more and develop into who you are is appreciated. I can feel the anxiety, the pain, the memory of the past slipping away and it only makes me want to let go faster--I have no use for it here. I barely even think of the past anymore.
I used to be someone who only focused on the future, but now I can focus on the moment too and there is so much joy in this moment. I'm still learning but THIS moment will never come again and I can transform THIS moment into something wonderful, for me or for someone else. And that has made all the difference. I can compare and contrast my previous district and this one, but at the end of the day it's irrelevant; what matters is now. In fact I was going to talk about some of it, but as soon as I started writing I didn't feel like thinking about it. I am free of her and her restrictions and everything else so why waste time thinking of them? She doesn't deserve a moment of my time and I have no interest in anything about her at all...and I think that is how it hit me that I have moved on.
I am free to be me again and I am thriving...and my students are growing, and I am just so very happy.
I mean, they expect you to focus and be on it when you are there and give 110%, but they get that you need play too. I don't know how to describe it; it's like feeling something changing inside you and starting to come out again. Something that was ridiculed and tossed aside so many times before and is now being recognized and valued, and the risk to come out more and develop into who you are is appreciated. I can feel the anxiety, the pain, the memory of the past slipping away and it only makes me want to let go faster--I have no use for it here. I barely even think of the past anymore.
I used to be someone who only focused on the future, but now I can focus on the moment too and there is so much joy in this moment. I'm still learning but THIS moment will never come again and I can transform THIS moment into something wonderful, for me or for someone else. And that has made all the difference. I can compare and contrast my previous district and this one, but at the end of the day it's irrelevant; what matters is now. In fact I was going to talk about some of it, but as soon as I started writing I didn't feel like thinking about it. I am free of her and her restrictions and everything else so why waste time thinking of them? She doesn't deserve a moment of my time and I have no interest in anything about her at all...and I think that is how it hit me that I have moved on.
I am free to be me again and I am thriving...and my students are growing, and I am just so very happy.