Roller coasters suck
Why did I want to write a book? Why did I make it a memoir? What crack pipe was I smoking when I decided this was a good idea?
Today I emailed with several people, including one of my ex-husbands, about content of the memoir. I shared relevant portions with several people and they all say "Wow, awesome job except for the part where you say I a) am an alcoholic, b) did coke with you in college, c) used to tell people I was gay, d) etc. Some things can be changed and some just shouldn't be. I am giving everyone the option of using pseudonyms, but of course anyone who knows them will know we are connected. So whatever, these are hard conversations (and I haven't even tackled my mother yet -- and won't until/unless I have a contract and a publication date).
I also received two rejections, one from a random agent who rejected the query without seeing the proposal or ms. (and that's fine, this is simply not her cup of tea) but a second from someone who saw the proposal and said "this is very good, but I don't think I can sell it in the crowded memoir market." On the up side, no one said "it sucks," but on the down side, rejection sucks NO MATTER WHAT. Like, a lot.
Meanwhile I am doing all of this instead of doing paying work, so the prospect of the family starving to death (there being two kids but no spouse) is starting to loom. Annoying.
I don't need an agent -- I need a patron, like in 17th century England. I'd like a house on someone's estate where I can sit and think great thoughts while my kids share tutors with the young Duke and his sisters.
Ugh.
Today I emailed with several people, including one of my ex-husbands, about content of the memoir. I shared relevant portions with several people and they all say "Wow, awesome job except for the part where you say I a) am an alcoholic, b) did coke with you in college, c) used to tell people I was gay, d) etc. Some things can be changed and some just shouldn't be. I am giving everyone the option of using pseudonyms, but of course anyone who knows them will know we are connected. So whatever, these are hard conversations (and I haven't even tackled my mother yet -- and won't until/unless I have a contract and a publication date).
I also received two rejections, one from a random agent who rejected the query without seeing the proposal or ms. (and that's fine, this is simply not her cup of tea) but a second from someone who saw the proposal and said "this is very good, but I don't think I can sell it in the crowded memoir market." On the up side, no one said "it sucks," but on the down side, rejection sucks NO MATTER WHAT. Like, a lot.
Meanwhile I am doing all of this instead of doing paying work, so the prospect of the family starving to death (there being two kids but no spouse) is starting to loom. Annoying.
I don't need an agent -- I need a patron, like in 17th century England. I'd like a house on someone's estate where I can sit and think great thoughts while my kids share tutors with the young Duke and his sisters.
Ugh.