The Ex-Files--another rant
While I have decided to make most of my personal entries to this journal locked, this one will be one of the few exceptions as it is a rant against the very reason I've made some of my entries private.
First of all, I've got to admit that I'm beginning to think that it could be me. Maybe I'm a bad relationship/dating/etc. breaker upper. The number of times when I've ended relationships or just the whole dating thing with guys, it seems to me that I may not have been firm enough. Why would I say that, you might ask? Well, perhaps it has something to do with the fact that they keep hounding me afterwards about "another chance" or about "working it out" or "just hanging out and talking" or whatever else cliched line there is out there. And it's not just one or two guys. That then brings me to the idea that maybe it's not them. Maybe it's me. Was I not resolved enough the first time 'round? Or the second time 'round? Or, (in two cases) the third and fourth and umpteenth time 'round? I've been nice and I've been mean. I've done it by phone, letter, and in person. What am I missing?
At first, I had thought the problem lies with them--in particular, an ex-bf of several years. What is it about some guys who can't seem to let go of the past? Today, I received another communication from said ex-bf attempting to arrange a meeting between us so that we could see about giving the relationship another chance. WTF?! It's been like...a little less than two years! I've moved on! He claims to have a gf (a woman a totally feel sorry for given his attitude)! Again, WTF?
For about one second I actually considered the meeting--if only to emphasize my very negative attitude towards the whole thing. Note, I said one second. After that I started getting annoyed again that he's making his problems regarding relationships and closures to be MY problems. What is this, a misery loves company thing? He's miserable so he's decided to attempt to make my life miserable too? Did he even consider the fact that I am seeing someone? And how unfair that is? Ugh! JERK!
And so, in the end, I've decided to ignore the letter and pretend it didn't exist--well, except for the fact that I'm ranting about it in my journal. If he's waiting for a response from me, this journal entry would have to do (because I know damn well he probably lurks around here). It's a little creepy, I think, and my friends have agreed with me. He claims not to be an online stalker or some such thing...but really. It feels as though the boy doth protests too much. I have also resolved to ignore/throw away/put in the shredder/delete any other communications from him without reading/perusing/skimming it prior to the act. It might be a little tough given my curious nature, but in the end, I think it's for the best. It just aggravates me too much to read through someone else's baggage. Not to mention that it makes me a little paranoid!
*sighs* So, I guess for me, at this point, the jury's still out. Am I just a bad breaker-upper? Or is it the case that I happen to subconsciously choose to go out with guys who can't seem to let go? Or is it them and guys in general?
First of all, I've got to admit that I'm beginning to think that it could be me. Maybe I'm a bad relationship/dating/etc. breaker upper. The number of times when I've ended relationships or just the whole dating thing with guys, it seems to me that I may not have been firm enough. Why would I say that, you might ask? Well, perhaps it has something to do with the fact that they keep hounding me afterwards about "another chance" or about "working it out" or "just hanging out and talking" or whatever else cliched line there is out there. And it's not just one or two guys. That then brings me to the idea that maybe it's not them. Maybe it's me. Was I not resolved enough the first time 'round? Or the second time 'round? Or, (in two cases) the third and fourth and umpteenth time 'round? I've been nice and I've been mean. I've done it by phone, letter, and in person. What am I missing?
At first, I had thought the problem lies with them--in particular, an ex-bf of several years. What is it about some guys who can't seem to let go of the past? Today, I received another communication from said ex-bf attempting to arrange a meeting between us so that we could see about giving the relationship another chance. WTF?! It's been like...a little less than two years! I've moved on! He claims to have a gf (a woman a totally feel sorry for given his attitude)! Again, WTF?
For about one second I actually considered the meeting--if only to emphasize my very negative attitude towards the whole thing. Note, I said one second. After that I started getting annoyed again that he's making his problems regarding relationships and closures to be MY problems. What is this, a misery loves company thing? He's miserable so he's decided to attempt to make my life miserable too? Did he even consider the fact that I am seeing someone? And how unfair that is? Ugh! JERK!
And so, in the end, I've decided to ignore the letter and pretend it didn't exist--well, except for the fact that I'm ranting about it in my journal. If he's waiting for a response from me, this journal entry would have to do (because I know damn well he probably lurks around here). It's a little creepy, I think, and my friends have agreed with me. He claims not to be an online stalker or some such thing...but really. It feels as though the boy doth protests too much. I have also resolved to ignore/throw away/put in the shredder/delete any other communications from him without reading/perusing/skimming it prior to the act. It might be a little tough given my curious nature, but in the end, I think it's for the best. It just aggravates me too much to read through someone else's baggage. Not to mention that it makes me a little paranoid!
*sighs* So, I guess for me, at this point, the jury's still out. Am I just a bad breaker-upper? Or is it the case that I happen to subconsciously choose to go out with guys who can't seem to let go? Or is it them and guys in general?