Sitting in Class, listening to music.
So, its been an intersting week. Currently i am sitting in Mr.Flanders room listening to music, trying not to smoke! I felt like a journal entry was well deserved. I had a dream about Leanna last night, i mis her , this is like the 4th dream i have had since we havent been friends, eh. I also had a dream that my math teacher (???) was drug searching me, and so i ended up eating all of the drugs i had on me, euuuck. Anyways, i have been doing alot of drugs, thats beside the point, ill remember that, i always do, but what i wont remember are the revelations that i have the the feelings that the drug culture and that my life at general at that point has given me. Probably a reprocussion of the drugs eating my memory alive, but whatever.
I wore a blue pattern dress today, no bra, it feels nice.
Anyways, so i finished the fountainhead last week, the book was so beautiful, it ended with Dominique getting elevated over Roarks building of the Wynand bilding ( the largest in the city), and then there was just the ocean and Roark. I felt that it was ironic because the major sections in the book were named after keating, Toohey, Roark and Wynand, but i think that Domninique was one of the main characters present throughout the whole book, and the one linking some of the characters together. She was a beautiful beautiful main character, her looks were never much discussed (her facial featuresm hair color, etc) But she seemed so so so beautiful, i would love to have sex with her. thats when you know a book is written well, when you lust for the main characters.
i love to write here, un punctuated, un flowing, fuck i hate writing because of the fucking structure of it, i cant fucking do it, and then i feel so intimidated by amazing literature. I need too, some part of me feels that creative urge, i think once i stopped deadding my mind with too much grateful dead. oh, dont get me wrong i love that music, but it does not capture the true essence of my soul, you know? like some of those songs that i have heard and that made me cry and see the world truly. i had some awesome revelations about art, and life and everything last week, on Friday, i was inspired by a good piece of film, or maybe the night, i believe it was a full moon.
But as of a whole i have been feeling alright, i have been getting alot of free time because of matt working, and the nice hours on my job , but i still need to stop doing nothing, and start turning the beauty and inspiration i see into something plausible, something thats me, you know? I am going to start to play the piano, becau sei would love lvoe love lvoe to use my synthesizer.
Alright, lunch time is almost over, well i want to do some more bullshit work.
<3 Sam.
I wore a blue pattern dress today, no bra, it feels nice.
Anyways, so i finished the fountainhead last week, the book was so beautiful, it ended with Dominique getting elevated over Roarks building of the Wynand bilding ( the largest in the city), and then there was just the ocean and Roark. I felt that it was ironic because the major sections in the book were named after keating, Toohey, Roark and Wynand, but i think that Domninique was one of the main characters present throughout the whole book, and the one linking some of the characters together. She was a beautiful beautiful main character, her looks were never much discussed (her facial featuresm hair color, etc) But she seemed so so so beautiful, i would love to have sex with her. thats when you know a book is written well, when you lust for the main characters.
i love to write here, un punctuated, un flowing, fuck i hate writing because of the fucking structure of it, i cant fucking do it, and then i feel so intimidated by amazing literature. I need too, some part of me feels that creative urge, i think once i stopped deadding my mind with too much grateful dead. oh, dont get me wrong i love that music, but it does not capture the true essence of my soul, you know? like some of those songs that i have heard and that made me cry and see the world truly. i had some awesome revelations about art, and life and everything last week, on Friday, i was inspired by a good piece of film, or maybe the night, i believe it was a full moon.
But as of a whole i have been feeling alright, i have been getting alot of free time because of matt working, and the nice hours on my job , but i still need to stop doing nothing, and start turning the beauty and inspiration i see into something plausible, something thats me, you know? I am going to start to play the piano, becau sei would love lvoe love lvoe to use my synthesizer.
Alright, lunch time is almost over, well i want to do some more bullshit work.
<3 Sam.