drabble dump (one)
aokis
rating: pg - pg-13
a/n: my brain has been going crazy lately, so i decided to let it run rampage on unrestricted drabbles! \o/ enjoy, everyone. ♥
important note: all of these drabbles take place in japan. each title is a tanka written by tawara machi. these will most likely be continued in a series dedicated to this. (i tried to translate them as best as possible, but a lot of the initial meanings got lost in translation. forgive me orz)
another not-as-important note: i'm thinking of opening a requests post, so let me know if you guys would ever like something written for you by me! ♥
01. 男には首のサイズがあることの 何か悲しきワイシャツ売場
(the mere fact that there are neck sizes for men at the dress shirt counter somehow strikes me as sad.)
changmin/jaejoong
jaejoong cheerfully sips at his green tea frappuccino, soaking up the rays of sun beaming brightly down on shibuya. there’s a slight breeze that refreshes yet replenishes at the same time, leaving the (mostly young) people coming and going undisturbed in their journey.
jaejoong thinks that changmin, however, is determined to disturb his journey. “what the fuck, jaejoong-hyung,” changmin growls, voice rough and not amused in the slightest.
“watch your language, dongsaeng.” jaejoong continues his leisurely strolling pace down the street, unaffected by changmin’s anger.
“no, seriously, jaejoong, what the fuck.” changmin tugs at jaejoong’s shirt.
jaejoong’s sure that if he turns to look at his dongsaeng, changmin’s eyes would be pulsating and his eyebrows would be furrowed. his eyes and eyebrows would probably still look perfect, too. “what ‘what the fuck’ do you mean?”
“there’s a lot of them,” changmin begins, voice slurring in harsh korean with how fast he’s speaking, “for one, you had to bring me, out of three other guys perfectly willing to shop and spend to your heart’s content, out to suffer in the large crowds instead of one of them.”
“you’re the tallest! i need the best eyes to locate the best stores,” jaejoong defends, smiling at a young girl who passes by with an exuberant greeting. he replies with a warm, enthusiastic greeting and a head pat.
changmin is obviously Even More Moody at being interrupted. “secondly, did you even think about what you put on to wear before you wore it? did you even look at yourself?”
“what a stupid question,” jaejoong chirps. he takes a glance down at his attire, and still finds himself pleased with his appearance. complimented with a deep-cut, black a-shirt, he had thrown on a pair of his skinny-fit, ripped jeans and black construction-type boots to match. “have you even seen most of what the guys are wearing here? this is shibuya’s finest street fashion, i’ll have you know!”
“you look ridiculous, i’ll have you know,” changmin snipes back, and jaejoong can suddenly sense his presence very close to his side. “don’t you think you’re showing off more than enough?”
“you’re being ridiculous,” jaejoong huffs, switching into japanese easily, “i’m blending in with shibuya! and i look good, thank you very much.” a young man around the same age of the pair chimes in with a, “really good” and a thumbs up as he passes by jaejoong. “see!” jaejoong finally turns to face changmin, whose face is fuming, one eyebrow raised in irritation.
then it dawns on jaejoong. he stops in the street, changmin softly knocking into his side at the suddenness, and places a hand on changmin’s chest, struggling to keep his laughter bottled. “wait, wait. you’re not jealous or being possessive, are you, dongsaeng?”
the pink tone in changmin’s cheeks and his neck-rubbing prove jaejoong correct, who just bursts into laughter. changmin scoffs in response and resumes walking, passing by jaejoong, expression still grim and petulant.
jaejoong watches his dongsaeng from his spot for a few seconds, a fond smile on his lips, until he sees a group of well-dressed, teenage girls look up at changmin and giggle, covering their mouths as he goes by. with a murderous feel blinding his vision, jaejoong decides it’s time he lets shibuya’s stores and people know that changmin is not for sale.
with a small jump in his jog, he hops onto changmin’s back, legs immediately curling around his waist and arms wrapping around his neck and shoulders. changmin grunts, but says nothing more as he holds jaejoong secure against his back and continues to walk.
“hey,” jaejoong speaks, resting his chin on changmin’s shoulder so his lips press against changmin’s neck, “do you want to go back? we can, if you really don’t want to be here.”
changmin fights to keep a grin off of his face. “no, it’s okay. we can stay.”
“good.” jaejoong presses a brief kiss to changmin’s temple and offers some of his frappuccino. “because i still have plenty of stores to peruse. i need some cheap dress shirts.”
changmin turns his head and stares suspiciously at jaejoong. “you’re being very obvious, you know.”
“i know. so what?” jaejoong looks up at changmin through his lashes.
changmin can’t fight the smirk that makes its way to his lips. “jealous of those girls, were you?”
“i was not!” jaejoong explodes childishly, angry all over again. he deflates quickly enough at changmin’s loud laughter, burying his face into changmin’s shirt. “shut up. you’re buying me crab for lunch and a dress coat.”
02. 男ではなくて 大人の返事する 君にチョコレート革命起こす
(not as a man, but as an “adult” you give your reply: against you i now declare, the chocolate revolution begins!)
changmin/yunho
“so hot,” yunho sighs, his body sinking even deeper into the steamy spring water. he looks out the large glass window in his front view to watch the sun cast setting hues of orange and dark pinks over mutsu bay.
changmin exhales loudly on yunho’s right, breath relaxed and relieved. his arms drench themselves in the hot water on their own accord. “great, right?”
yunho simply nods, too focused on the water outside than the water inside. he can see the fading reflection cast off of the bay, twinkling as bright as stars in the sky.
“i told you,” changmin gloats, satisfied smirk on his face. he props his chin against a fist in mock thought, eyes tracing the wooden ceiling. “kiyoshi-san definitely knows good onsen. you need to have more faith in-”
“hey,” yunho softly interrupts, his arms winding around changmin’s waist from under the water and sliding him closer.
when he sees a look of pure adoration in yunho’s eyes, changmin thinks his heart stops for a few seconds. he blinks innocent eyes at him. “what?”
yunho smiles, brushing a few damp pieces of changmin’s hair out of his eyes. though the sunset sight in aomori prefecture is breathtaking, yunho still believes changmin will forever be the best at taking his breath away. “nothing.”
past the steam rising around their bodies, yunho can see changmin’s blushing cheeks and shy eyes cast downwards. changmin’s fingers slowly fit around yunho’s under the water, lazy, yet just as meaningful as ever.
“you’re right, kiyoshi-kun is completely to thank,” yunho indulges and takes advantage of changmin’s silence, hand still lightly weaving through changmin’s hair, “though we’ve been thinking of taking this vacation up north for a while. it’s you i should be thanking for convincing me to go.”
changmin snorts. “you’re a person, just like everyone else. you deserve a vacation, too, yunho.”
yunho smiles softly and looks out to the bay again. the sun is almost done casting its colours, a particular patch of light coming in through the window and reflecting off of them. “changmin-ah, look at the bay.”
changmin, always ever with youthful curiosity, does what yunho says, eyes glued at the way the waterline deepens and how the mountains contribute to the darkening skyline. all is quiet in the onsen, the two privileged with privacy, and yunho is more than content to stare at his younger counterpart, the way the setting sun makes changmin’s tanned skin sparkle.
“i love you.” it’s quiet, it’s in english, it’s risky to say in public, but yunho thinks it’s all worth it and more at the way changmin’s doe eyes flick to yunho’s face in surprise in a split second.
after a few more seconds of nothing but the sound of the spring water floor and the bay water waves, changmin quietly chuckles and settles as close to yunho as possible, resting his head against yunho’s shoulder. “we need to work on your accent,” he mock whispers.
yunho huffs in indignation, despite the bright grin fitting over his lips. “tomorrow, when we go to shimokita-hanto. i wonder if i can find some candy in town, too.”
“candy?” changmin laughs in disbelief, flicking a tiny bit of water in yunho’s direction. “we travel all the way to the north and you want candy?”
“there’s nothing wrong with that,” is yunho’s childish response, an added pout thrown in for effect. he crosses his arms and grumbles.
“hey.”
changmin’s still smiling when yunho feels a pair of lean, strong arms pull him against changmin’s chest. “if you want candy, you can have as much as your heart desires when you take me to atami for our next vacation. until then, let’s enjoy aomori as much as our hearts desire while we’re here.”
and as the sun finally drops from the skyline, changmin kisses yunho tenderly and in all the best ways that take yunho’s breath away.
03. いつもより一分早く駅に着く 一分君のこと考える
(i arrive at the station a minute early; i think about you for a minute.)
junsu/yunho
there is a saying that junsu remembers hearing some time ago, filed in the back of his brain as merely filler knowledge. he finds it completely ironic that it’s the first thing he thinks about as yoochun drives him from the heart of toshima to ikebukuro station.
the hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. junsu agrees wholeheartedly from first-hand experience, as much as he tries to erase the memories and the damage permanently done, seemingly more painful as time promises to heal.
“you’re sure you want to do this?” yoochun asks, supportive and nothing else. “it’s a big decision, uprooting yourself.”
junsu simply nods, preoccupied by looking out the window and at the neon signs, the crowds, the lights. though he knows he’ll miss toshima with all of his heart, he also knows that leaving (behind that certain part of his heart) is essential if he ever hopes to build his heart back.
he believes that it’s not the initial fall that hurts (the snubbing, the avoiding, the leaving, the tears, the loneliness), but the sheer incredibility of the happiness before the fall (holding hands, the shy smiles, the endearing kisses, the tender touches).
yoochun parks on the side of the street in front of the station and turns to junsu, eyes loving and sympathetic. “i couldn’t be more happy that you want to get back up again, junsu-yah. i wish you the best in whatever you decide, and you know i’ll always support you. the being-best-friends thing doesn’t change anything.”
junsu forbids himself from crying. he smiles thankfully at yoochun, body language always able to say so much more than what his words could. “i’ll call you when i get to takadanobaba.” he grabs his bag from the backseat of yoochun’s car, stands up and walks towards the station doors.
“junsu,” yoochun calls him back.
curious, junsu turns his head and gives yoochun an odd look when he’s beckoned back towards the car. he does what he’s told and leans into the passenger door, window rolled completely down.
“if you love somebody, set them free. if they return, they were always yours. if they don’t, they never were.” yoochun winks softly at junsu, his eyes twinkling. “make sure to remember that, junsu-yah.”
and with that, before junsu can even open his mouth, yoochun is putting the car into drive and pulling back into the traffic of ikebukuro. junsu stands on the street for a few seconds, dumbfounded, before he realizes that he needs to hurry. his train leaves in less than ten minutes.
he sits down on one of the benches in the middle of the station’s general area, lone bag tucked behind his feet. he plays with his ticket, glances at a few louder passing groups and lets his mind wander. he’s prepared, already, when his mind wanders into the broken-into box full of pain and, inevitably, happiness.
first, he wonders. wonders why they started a relationship in the first place, why he left without saying goodbye. he wonders how he’s doing, when he realizes that he probably won’t ever know where he disappeared to. second, he wishes. wishes he’d never met him, wishes maybe he could have fixed things. third, he dares to want. wants to see him one last time.
he hears the arrival for his train and makes to quickly stand up and orient himself. time’s up. slugging his bag over his shoulder and beginning to walk to the platform, he promises to leave the last of his thoughts like a weaved trail throughout ikebukuro station. where it starts, it should end.
“junsu?”
junsu freezes, instantly as if the coldest existing ice has been dumped down his back. first, he panics. second, he swallows slowly. and third, he turns around.
looks right at yunho’s shocked and equally pained face. junsu thinks he looks the same as before, slightly bleached hair resting halfway down his neck, long legs encased in jeans and boots, and carrying a similar travel bag to junsu’s.
there’s a lot exchanged in their silence. neither of them move an inch (forwards or backwards), though junsu learns everything he needs to know from yunho’s (apologetic, guilt-ridden, loving, strong, devoted) gaze.
suddenly, quiet laughs are escaping from his throat. he’s missed his train. “yoochun?”
yunho finally smiles. though it’s soft and terrified, it’s the one thing that warms junsu’s heart from the perpetually everlasting ice. “yoochun.”
junsu decides to take another chance. just as yoochun had told him, yunho had come back, and junsu knows, deep down, that he’ll always be yunho’s.
when the crowds in ikebukuro station clear from rush hour and junsu is in yunho’s arms, in the middle of the lobby, holding on with the intentions of never letting go, junsu is perfectly fine with missing his train, since yunho is where his home is.
04. ポン・ヌフに初夏（はつなつ）の風 ありふれた恋人同士として歩きたい
(all along pont neuf there's an early summer breeze, everyday lovers strolling in the wind... my wish to be crossing there with you.)
junsu/changmin
junsu wanders in the darkening park full of blossomed sakura, head down to prevent being looked at full-on in the face. he knows what he’s doing is highly dangerous, and the full extent of the consequences of his actions if caught. he doesn’t know why he agreed in the first place.
he jumps when he feels a pair of long arms slide around his waist and halt his wanderlust. the hold is gentle and secure, telling junsu things like it’s okay, i’m here and you’re with me now, you’re safe.
junsu’s not sure how he feels about his heart being so full.
“relax, it’s just me,” changmin’s lips whisper into junsu’s ear, pulling junsu back farther until they’re chest-to-back.
junsu does relax. after a few seconds of changmin’s fingers tracing his ribs through his coat, junsu decides he wants to look at changmin’s face to tell him off. “changmin, we need to stop this.”
“oh?” changmin’s one eyebrow raises, but that’s all the physical reaction junsu gets from him.
“yes,” junsu pushes, lightly pushing changmin’s arms from him, “i have to get back to kagurazaka before anyone notices i’m missing, and if your wife ever found out about this-”
changmin pulls junsu back into an embrace, one arm locked tight around his waist and the other carding through his hair. “junsu, you’re a courtesan, are you not?”
junsu simply nods, too distracted by changmin’s affections to give a better answer.
“your life is to keep people like me company,” changmin murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to the nape of junsu’s neck. “living in the hanamachi for years has put you on edge. kiyomi wouldn’t care. she knows.”
“knows what?” junsu hisses. “she could destroy us both.”
“not likely.” changmin turns junsu around in his arms to look into his eyes. junsu feels his knees go weak. “kiyomi and her family need my money. she knows i don’t love my business arrangements.”
junsu watches a sakura petal blow past in the distance. “how do you know that?”
“because i love you, and i know what i love.” changmin encloses his hand around a bulb that floats towards them.
despite being warmer than summer on the inside, junsu is frozen like winter on the outside. “changmin, you know you can’t. it’s not allowed.”
“let me decide that, junsu.” changmin slips the sakura bud into junsu’s hand, holding on tight. “do you like being in the hanamachi?”
“no,” junsu answers honestly after a pause.
changmin leans forward to press a kiss to junsu’s closed fist. “do you like being with me?”
“more than anything,” junsu blurts out. he can’t lie to changmin; changmin knows junsu lives for him, to accompany him.
when changmin breaks out into a breathtaking grin, junsu knows he can’t refuse what comes next out from changmin’s mouth. “won’t you come and live with me, then?”
“okay,” junsu splutters. this is happening too fast for him to process.
“from now on, then, everything i don’t want is not allowed. i want to love you, so you must deal with it in any way you want.”
the next thing junsu knows is that changmin is kissing him. junsu clings onto changmin’s shoulders for dear life, addicted to changmin’s lips just as much as changmin himself is addicting.
he remembers why he agreed in the first place.
(01: shibuya street fashion for men usually consists of dark wash, ripped jeans with boots and deep cut shirts. shibuya is known as japan's "fashion center".
02: mutsu bay is a bay in aomori prefecture, the most northern prefecture on honshu island.
changmin is referring to another city in japan known for its onsen and beaches, which is atami.
03: junsu is leaving from ikebukuro station, the second busiest railway station in japan, to move to a stop along the seibu-ikebukuro line, takadanobaba. it's mostly known for its catering towards university students.
04: there are several things referenced; a courtesan is somewhat of a mistress, who lives in the household of someone of a higher status to keep them company and provide entertainment.
hanamachi describe neighbourhoods where geisha and courtesan communities usually house.
when mentioning kagurazaka, junsu is referring to a popular district in tokyo where most known geisha stay. presently, it homes rare restaurants who still provide geisha entertainment and has a large french influence.)
rating: pg - pg-13
a/n: my brain has been going crazy lately, so i decided to let it run rampage on unrestricted drabbles! \o/ enjoy, everyone. ♥
important note: all of these drabbles take place in japan. each title is a tanka written by tawara machi. these will most likely be continued in a series dedicated to this. (i tried to translate them as best as possible, but a lot of the initial meanings got lost in translation. forgive me orz)
another not-as-important note: i'm thinking of opening a requests post, so let me know if you guys would ever like something written for you by me! ♥
01. 男には首のサイズがあることの 何か悲しきワイシャツ売場
(the mere fact that there are neck sizes for men at the dress shirt counter somehow strikes me as sad.)
changmin/jaejoong
jaejoong cheerfully sips at his green tea frappuccino, soaking up the rays of sun beaming brightly down on shibuya. there’s a slight breeze that refreshes yet replenishes at the same time, leaving the (mostly young) people coming and going undisturbed in their journey.
jaejoong thinks that changmin, however, is determined to disturb his journey. “what the fuck, jaejoong-hyung,” changmin growls, voice rough and not amused in the slightest.
“watch your language, dongsaeng.” jaejoong continues his leisurely strolling pace down the street, unaffected by changmin’s anger.
“no, seriously, jaejoong, what the fuck.” changmin tugs at jaejoong’s shirt.
jaejoong’s sure that if he turns to look at his dongsaeng, changmin’s eyes would be pulsating and his eyebrows would be furrowed. his eyes and eyebrows would probably still look perfect, too. “what ‘what the fuck’ do you mean?”
“there’s a lot of them,” changmin begins, voice slurring in harsh korean with how fast he’s speaking, “for one, you had to bring me, out of three other guys perfectly willing to shop and spend to your heart’s content, out to suffer in the large crowds instead of one of them.”
“you’re the tallest! i need the best eyes to locate the best stores,” jaejoong defends, smiling at a young girl who passes by with an exuberant greeting. he replies with a warm, enthusiastic greeting and a head pat.
changmin is obviously Even More Moody at being interrupted. “secondly, did you even think about what you put on to wear before you wore it? did you even look at yourself?”
“what a stupid question,” jaejoong chirps. he takes a glance down at his attire, and still finds himself pleased with his appearance. complimented with a deep-cut, black a-shirt, he had thrown on a pair of his skinny-fit, ripped jeans and black construction-type boots to match. “have you even seen most of what the guys are wearing here? this is shibuya’s finest street fashion, i’ll have you know!”
“you look ridiculous, i’ll have you know,” changmin snipes back, and jaejoong can suddenly sense his presence very close to his side. “don’t you think you’re showing off more than enough?”
“you’re being ridiculous,” jaejoong huffs, switching into japanese easily, “i’m blending in with shibuya! and i look good, thank you very much.” a young man around the same age of the pair chimes in with a, “really good” and a thumbs up as he passes by jaejoong. “see!” jaejoong finally turns to face changmin, whose face is fuming, one eyebrow raised in irritation.
then it dawns on jaejoong. he stops in the street, changmin softly knocking into his side at the suddenness, and places a hand on changmin’s chest, struggling to keep his laughter bottled. “wait, wait. you’re not jealous or being possessive, are you, dongsaeng?”
the pink tone in changmin’s cheeks and his neck-rubbing prove jaejoong correct, who just bursts into laughter. changmin scoffs in response and resumes walking, passing by jaejoong, expression still grim and petulant.
jaejoong watches his dongsaeng from his spot for a few seconds, a fond smile on his lips, until he sees a group of well-dressed, teenage girls look up at changmin and giggle, covering their mouths as he goes by. with a murderous feel blinding his vision, jaejoong decides it’s time he lets shibuya’s stores and people know that changmin is not for sale.
with a small jump in his jog, he hops onto changmin’s back, legs immediately curling around his waist and arms wrapping around his neck and shoulders. changmin grunts, but says nothing more as he holds jaejoong secure against his back and continues to walk.
“hey,” jaejoong speaks, resting his chin on changmin’s shoulder so his lips press against changmin’s neck, “do you want to go back? we can, if you really don’t want to be here.”
changmin fights to keep a grin off of his face. “no, it’s okay. we can stay.”
“good.” jaejoong presses a brief kiss to changmin’s temple and offers some of his frappuccino. “because i still have plenty of stores to peruse. i need some cheap dress shirts.”
changmin turns his head and stares suspiciously at jaejoong. “you’re being very obvious, you know.”
“i know. so what?” jaejoong looks up at changmin through his lashes.
changmin can’t fight the smirk that makes its way to his lips. “jealous of those girls, were you?”
“i was not!” jaejoong explodes childishly, angry all over again. he deflates quickly enough at changmin’s loud laughter, burying his face into changmin’s shirt. “shut up. you’re buying me crab for lunch and a dress coat.”
02. 男ではなくて 大人の返事する 君にチョコレート革命起こす
(not as a man, but as an “adult” you give your reply: against you i now declare, the chocolate revolution begins!)
changmin/yunho
“so hot,” yunho sighs, his body sinking even deeper into the steamy spring water. he looks out the large glass window in his front view to watch the sun cast setting hues of orange and dark pinks over mutsu bay.
changmin exhales loudly on yunho’s right, breath relaxed and relieved. his arms drench themselves in the hot water on their own accord. “great, right?”
yunho simply nods, too focused on the water outside than the water inside. he can see the fading reflection cast off of the bay, twinkling as bright as stars in the sky.
“i told you,” changmin gloats, satisfied smirk on his face. he props his chin against a fist in mock thought, eyes tracing the wooden ceiling. “kiyoshi-san definitely knows good onsen. you need to have more faith in-”
“hey,” yunho softly interrupts, his arms winding around changmin’s waist from under the water and sliding him closer.
when he sees a look of pure adoration in yunho’s eyes, changmin thinks his heart stops for a few seconds. he blinks innocent eyes at him. “what?”
yunho smiles, brushing a few damp pieces of changmin’s hair out of his eyes. though the sunset sight in aomori prefecture is breathtaking, yunho still believes changmin will forever be the best at taking his breath away. “nothing.”
past the steam rising around their bodies, yunho can see changmin’s blushing cheeks and shy eyes cast downwards. changmin’s fingers slowly fit around yunho’s under the water, lazy, yet just as meaningful as ever.
“you’re right, kiyoshi-kun is completely to thank,” yunho indulges and takes advantage of changmin’s silence, hand still lightly weaving through changmin’s hair, “though we’ve been thinking of taking this vacation up north for a while. it’s you i should be thanking for convincing me to go.”
changmin snorts. “you’re a person, just like everyone else. you deserve a vacation, too, yunho.”
yunho smiles softly and looks out to the bay again. the sun is almost done casting its colours, a particular patch of light coming in through the window and reflecting off of them. “changmin-ah, look at the bay.”
changmin, always ever with youthful curiosity, does what yunho says, eyes glued at the way the waterline deepens and how the mountains contribute to the darkening skyline. all is quiet in the onsen, the two privileged with privacy, and yunho is more than content to stare at his younger counterpart, the way the setting sun makes changmin’s tanned skin sparkle.
“i love you.” it’s quiet, it’s in english, it’s risky to say in public, but yunho thinks it’s all worth it and more at the way changmin’s doe eyes flick to yunho’s face in surprise in a split second.
after a few more seconds of nothing but the sound of the spring water floor and the bay water waves, changmin quietly chuckles and settles as close to yunho as possible, resting his head against yunho’s shoulder. “we need to work on your accent,” he mock whispers.
yunho huffs in indignation, despite the bright grin fitting over his lips. “tomorrow, when we go to shimokita-hanto. i wonder if i can find some candy in town, too.”
“candy?” changmin laughs in disbelief, flicking a tiny bit of water in yunho’s direction. “we travel all the way to the north and you want candy?”
“there’s nothing wrong with that,” is yunho’s childish response, an added pout thrown in for effect. he crosses his arms and grumbles.
“hey.”
changmin’s still smiling when yunho feels a pair of lean, strong arms pull him against changmin’s chest. “if you want candy, you can have as much as your heart desires when you take me to atami for our next vacation. until then, let’s enjoy aomori as much as our hearts desire while we’re here.”
and as the sun finally drops from the skyline, changmin kisses yunho tenderly and in all the best ways that take yunho’s breath away.
03. いつもより一分早く駅に着く 一分君のこと考える
(i arrive at the station a minute early; i think about you for a minute.)
junsu/yunho
there is a saying that junsu remembers hearing some time ago, filed in the back of his brain as merely filler knowledge. he finds it completely ironic that it’s the first thing he thinks about as yoochun drives him from the heart of toshima to ikebukuro station.
the hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. junsu agrees wholeheartedly from first-hand experience, as much as he tries to erase the memories and the damage permanently done, seemingly more painful as time promises to heal.
“you’re sure you want to do this?” yoochun asks, supportive and nothing else. “it’s a big decision, uprooting yourself.”
junsu simply nods, preoccupied by looking out the window and at the neon signs, the crowds, the lights. though he knows he’ll miss toshima with all of his heart, he also knows that leaving (behind that certain part of his heart) is essential if he ever hopes to build his heart back.
he believes that it’s not the initial fall that hurts (the snubbing, the avoiding, the leaving, the tears, the loneliness), but the sheer incredibility of the happiness before the fall (holding hands, the shy smiles, the endearing kisses, the tender touches).
yoochun parks on the side of the street in front of the station and turns to junsu, eyes loving and sympathetic. “i couldn’t be more happy that you want to get back up again, junsu-yah. i wish you the best in whatever you decide, and you know i’ll always support you. the being-best-friends thing doesn’t change anything.”
junsu forbids himself from crying. he smiles thankfully at yoochun, body language always able to say so much more than what his words could. “i’ll call you when i get to takadanobaba.” he grabs his bag from the backseat of yoochun’s car, stands up and walks towards the station doors.
“junsu,” yoochun calls him back.
curious, junsu turns his head and gives yoochun an odd look when he’s beckoned back towards the car. he does what he’s told and leans into the passenger door, window rolled completely down.
“if you love somebody, set them free. if they return, they were always yours. if they don’t, they never were.” yoochun winks softly at junsu, his eyes twinkling. “make sure to remember that, junsu-yah.”
and with that, before junsu can even open his mouth, yoochun is putting the car into drive and pulling back into the traffic of ikebukuro. junsu stands on the street for a few seconds, dumbfounded, before he realizes that he needs to hurry. his train leaves in less than ten minutes.
he sits down on one of the benches in the middle of the station’s general area, lone bag tucked behind his feet. he plays with his ticket, glances at a few louder passing groups and lets his mind wander. he’s prepared, already, when his mind wanders into the broken-into box full of pain and, inevitably, happiness.
first, he wonders. wonders why they started a relationship in the first place, why he left without saying goodbye. he wonders how he’s doing, when he realizes that he probably won’t ever know where he disappeared to. second, he wishes. wishes he’d never met him, wishes maybe he could have fixed things. third, he dares to want. wants to see him one last time.
he hears the arrival for his train and makes to quickly stand up and orient himself. time’s up. slugging his bag over his shoulder and beginning to walk to the platform, he promises to leave the last of his thoughts like a weaved trail throughout ikebukuro station. where it starts, it should end.
“junsu?”
junsu freezes, instantly as if the coldest existing ice has been dumped down his back. first, he panics. second, he swallows slowly. and third, he turns around.
looks right at yunho’s shocked and equally pained face. junsu thinks he looks the same as before, slightly bleached hair resting halfway down his neck, long legs encased in jeans and boots, and carrying a similar travel bag to junsu’s.
there’s a lot exchanged in their silence. neither of them move an inch (forwards or backwards), though junsu learns everything he needs to know from yunho’s (apologetic, guilt-ridden, loving, strong, devoted) gaze.
suddenly, quiet laughs are escaping from his throat. he’s missed his train. “yoochun?”
yunho finally smiles. though it’s soft and terrified, it’s the one thing that warms junsu’s heart from the perpetually everlasting ice. “yoochun.”
junsu decides to take another chance. just as yoochun had told him, yunho had come back, and junsu knows, deep down, that he’ll always be yunho’s.
when the crowds in ikebukuro station clear from rush hour and junsu is in yunho’s arms, in the middle of the lobby, holding on with the intentions of never letting go, junsu is perfectly fine with missing his train, since yunho is where his home is.
04. ポン・ヌフに初夏（はつなつ）の風 ありふれた恋人同士として歩きたい
(all along pont neuf there's an early summer breeze, everyday lovers strolling in the wind... my wish to be crossing there with you.)
junsu/changmin
junsu wanders in the darkening park full of blossomed sakura, head down to prevent being looked at full-on in the face. he knows what he’s doing is highly dangerous, and the full extent of the consequences of his actions if caught. he doesn’t know why he agreed in the first place.
he jumps when he feels a pair of long arms slide around his waist and halt his wanderlust. the hold is gentle and secure, telling junsu things like it’s okay, i’m here and you’re with me now, you’re safe.
junsu’s not sure how he feels about his heart being so full.
“relax, it’s just me,” changmin’s lips whisper into junsu’s ear, pulling junsu back farther until they’re chest-to-back.
junsu does relax. after a few seconds of changmin’s fingers tracing his ribs through his coat, junsu decides he wants to look at changmin’s face to tell him off. “changmin, we need to stop this.”
“oh?” changmin’s one eyebrow raises, but that’s all the physical reaction junsu gets from him.
“yes,” junsu pushes, lightly pushing changmin’s arms from him, “i have to get back to kagurazaka before anyone notices i’m missing, and if your wife ever found out about this-”
changmin pulls junsu back into an embrace, one arm locked tight around his waist and the other carding through his hair. “junsu, you’re a courtesan, are you not?”
junsu simply nods, too distracted by changmin’s affections to give a better answer.
“your life is to keep people like me company,” changmin murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to the nape of junsu’s neck. “living in the hanamachi for years has put you on edge. kiyomi wouldn’t care. she knows.”
“knows what?” junsu hisses. “she could destroy us both.”
“not likely.” changmin turns junsu around in his arms to look into his eyes. junsu feels his knees go weak. “kiyomi and her family need my money. she knows i don’t love my business arrangements.”
junsu watches a sakura petal blow past in the distance. “how do you know that?”
“because i love you, and i know what i love.” changmin encloses his hand around a bulb that floats towards them.
despite being warmer than summer on the inside, junsu is frozen like winter on the outside. “changmin, you know you can’t. it’s not allowed.”
“let me decide that, junsu.” changmin slips the sakura bud into junsu’s hand, holding on tight. “do you like being in the hanamachi?”
“no,” junsu answers honestly after a pause.
changmin leans forward to press a kiss to junsu’s closed fist. “do you like being with me?”
“more than anything,” junsu blurts out. he can’t lie to changmin; changmin knows junsu lives for him, to accompany him.
when changmin breaks out into a breathtaking grin, junsu knows he can’t refuse what comes next out from changmin’s mouth. “won’t you come and live with me, then?”
“okay,” junsu splutters. this is happening too fast for him to process.
“from now on, then, everything i don’t want is not allowed. i want to love you, so you must deal with it in any way you want.”
the next thing junsu knows is that changmin is kissing him. junsu clings onto changmin’s shoulders for dear life, addicted to changmin’s lips just as much as changmin himself is addicting.
he remembers why he agreed in the first place.
(01: shibuya street fashion for men usually consists of dark wash, ripped jeans with boots and deep cut shirts. shibuya is known as japan's "fashion center".
02: mutsu bay is a bay in aomori prefecture, the most northern prefecture on honshu island.
changmin is referring to another city in japan known for its onsen and beaches, which is atami.
03: junsu is leaving from ikebukuro station, the second busiest railway station in japan, to move to a stop along the seibu-ikebukuro line, takadanobaba. it's mostly known for its catering towards university students.
04: there are several things referenced; a courtesan is somewhat of a mistress, who lives in the household of someone of a higher status to keep them company and provide entertainment.
hanamachi describe neighbourhoods where geisha and courtesan communities usually house.
when mentioning kagurazaka, junsu is referring to a popular district in tokyo where most known geisha stay. presently, it homes rare restaurants who still provide geisha entertainment and has a large french influence.)