The Day I Took My Teddy Bear to Law School
I’M STILL IN LAW SCHOOL. DON’T ASK WHY. I JUST LIKE THE TEDDY BEAR. NONE OF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE TO ME. BUT THE TEDDY BEAR IS REALLY COOL. HE'S MY PAL.
In the weeks since I returned from overseas, I’ve become a bit of a hermit. The weather has been oppressive, and to my mind really discourages leaving the house. I only have classes on Monday evenings and Wednesdays, so I don’t spend much time at school. Even when I do go to school, things like the newspaper and keeping my sanity require that extra-personal interaction be kept to a minimum. Since Nancy gave me some barbecue popcorn, I have no reason to go out on weekends. Instead, sitting at home watching Fawlty Towers DVDs and reruns of Hugh Grant movies is a much more exciting and effortless entertainment option. Of course, to say I don’t socialize with anyone would be inaccurate, because in the last couple of weeks I’ve come to be very close to someone, someone I consider a true friend. Who is this true friend, you ask? Well, it’s simply Tippi, my teddy bear.
Tippi and I have a strong relationship. He gets me, and I understand him. Still, he’s new to Canadian winters and Osgoode, so I’ve decided to take him around and show him the ropes as it were. We’ve had some really exciting times, especially when we’ve been hanging with Sunny D, my little orange stuffed dolphin. More importantly, we’ve had some really stimulating conversations about the world today. Here are some of the more memorable moments from one memorable day last week.
Part One: CREDITS
“Why do we have to get up so early?” This was Tippi’s complaint on Wednesday morning. We had Evidence at eight-thirty, and this meant we had to get up at seven if we hoped to be on time. It didn’t help that snow was still falling and traffic was slow-going.
“Because we have class this morning, dude.” He sighed, but hopped out of bed and brushed his teeth anyway. What a good kid! On the way to school, he asked why I took the morning Evidence class, instead of the Tuesday evening class. That way, he reasoned, I wouldn’t have to get up so early and drag us both to school.
“Well, the problem is the class on Tuesday night is only three credits, and the morning one is four credits. That’s because the night class is only scheduled for three hours, and the morning classes go for four hours. I need the four credits, and because there are no other four credit classes this semester, I have to take it.”
Tippi wasn’t satisfied, because he also knew the morning classes never went for four hours, because the professor was a very busy man. Everyone knew this, and no one complained, but no one understood why the other class was only three credits. After all, students spent as much time in lectures there as they did in the other class?
“I don’t know, Tippi. I don’t know. That’s just the way law school is. In the words of Cat (No-Fly) Stevens, it’s a wild world.”
We drove on in silence, the snow slowly enveloping our thoughts.
Part Two: THE DARK
“This school’s too dark,” complained Tippi. “The walls are ugly brown and there’s no windows.”
We had arrived at Osgoode, and Tippi was confronted by its bleakness for the first time. I just shrugged. It was a common observation, and no one really knew the answer. But Tippi had an idea.
“Is that to counter the fact that 90% of the people here are white?”
Part Three: THE COLD
“Wow! It’s really cold here!” We had left Osgoode to get some lunch at York Lanes. It had been colder in the morning when we walked from the parking lot to the school, but Tippi had fallen asleep, so I tucked him into my school bag. Now, walking between buildings, he was getting a real sense of a snowy, slushy Canadian winter.
“How come you didn’t give me any long-johns or anything? It’s gotta’ be minus twenty-five or something! I’m a teddy bear, not a polar bear, although my uncle Ralph was made into a stuffed polar bear.”
“Sorry Tippi, I wasn’t thinking.” The guilt was overwhelming. I was wearing thermal underwear, two pairs of socks and a hat, and I didn’t give the poor little guy anything!
“Sorry! I’m a law student, and we only think of ourselves! I’ll make it up to you I promise!”
He just hugged himself tight and put his head down as we sloshed through the worst winter had to offer. Finally, he broke the silence.
“Do you know what the scientific name for polar bear is? Ursus maritimus.”
We walked on.
Part Four: FRIENDS
After a quiet lunch, we were spending a quiet afternoon reading in the mixing area. At least I was trying to read. Tippi was getting frustrated. He needed to talk to someone (teddy bears are inherently very sociable creatures). “Where are all your friends?” he asked, exasperated.
“Sorry? Friends?”
“Yeah, you know, friends. People you talk to and laugh with. You’re a handsome and smart and funny guy, so where are they?”
“Well, I have a few friends, but I don’t think that really happens at Osgoode. Most people just sort of keep to themselves and keep the friends they have outside of school. It’s a law school thing.” I turned back to my books.
Tippi, however, wasn’t satisfied. “What do you mean, it’s a law school thing? You had friends at the other law school? Why not here?”
“Well, most people here are pretty nice. They say please and thank you.”
“Forget nice, what about friends?”
“Umm…I guess…I suppose it’s because here, we all have to compete with each other. There, you get good marks if you do well. Here, you get good marks if you do better than everyone else. So when someone needs notes or something because they’re too sick to make it to class, they ask one of the Deans for help. And when the Dean asks students for notes, she has to tell them that no one else will see or use the notes. Otherwise, no one will give them to the sick kid. See what I mean?”
Tippi nodded, slowly digesting what I had just said. “I miss Ed. He was my friend,” said Tippi. “He helped me when I was sick.” I smiled and patted him on the head. Ed was his best friend in Ireland, but he stayed behind. They were real pals. What a nice little guy to remember him!
Part Five: STUBBORN ICE
It was almost ten when we left that night. It had been a long, tiring day, and neither one of us really wanted to step out into the dark and cold. A fresh layer of snow had fallen on the ground, and Tippi dragged his feet. Poor little guy, he was exhausted!
He stopped on the path that runs by the trees between Osgoode and Passy. Drained, he just plopped into the snow under the trees. Fortunately, he was all wrapped up in a scarf and had one of my socks for a hat.
“I just need to rest for a minute, it’s been a long day.” While he sat and rested, I checked my phone messages. When I turned around, I saw him in an argument with a squirrel. By the time I reached him, the squirrel had run off, cussing angrily.
I asked Tippi what had happened. “The squirrel was being really rude. He kept telling me to get out of here, that I didn’t belong around here because I’m not a real animal. He said only real bears are allowed here, not pretend ones.”
“Aww, I’m sorry pal. Don’t listen to him, he’s just really narrow-minded.”
Tippi looked up, and I could see he was smiling. “It’s okay,” he said. “When he stopped talking, I just told him he was a fake skunk in a fake forest, and that he had really bad breath. Then he got all angry and ran off.”
What a brave and smart little guy! We laughed and started walking again. We’re pals!
In the weeks since I returned from overseas, I’ve become a bit of a hermit. The weather has been oppressive, and to my mind really discourages leaving the house. I only have classes on Monday evenings and Wednesdays, so I don’t spend much time at school. Even when I do go to school, things like the newspaper and keeping my sanity require that extra-personal interaction be kept to a minimum. Since Nancy gave me some barbecue popcorn, I have no reason to go out on weekends. Instead, sitting at home watching Fawlty Towers DVDs and reruns of Hugh Grant movies is a much more exciting and effortless entertainment option. Of course, to say I don’t socialize with anyone would be inaccurate, because in the last couple of weeks I’ve come to be very close to someone, someone I consider a true friend. Who is this true friend, you ask? Well, it’s simply Tippi, my teddy bear.
Tippi and I have a strong relationship. He gets me, and I understand him. Still, he’s new to Canadian winters and Osgoode, so I’ve decided to take him around and show him the ropes as it were. We’ve had some really exciting times, especially when we’ve been hanging with Sunny D, my little orange stuffed dolphin. More importantly, we’ve had some really stimulating conversations about the world today. Here are some of the more memorable moments from one memorable day last week.
Part One: CREDITS
“Why do we have to get up so early?” This was Tippi’s complaint on Wednesday morning. We had Evidence at eight-thirty, and this meant we had to get up at seven if we hoped to be on time. It didn’t help that snow was still falling and traffic was slow-going.
“Because we have class this morning, dude.” He sighed, but hopped out of bed and brushed his teeth anyway. What a good kid! On the way to school, he asked why I took the morning Evidence class, instead of the Tuesday evening class. That way, he reasoned, I wouldn’t have to get up so early and drag us both to school.
“Well, the problem is the class on Tuesday night is only three credits, and the morning one is four credits. That’s because the night class is only scheduled for three hours, and the morning classes go for four hours. I need the four credits, and because there are no other four credit classes this semester, I have to take it.”
Tippi wasn’t satisfied, because he also knew the morning classes never went for four hours, because the professor was a very busy man. Everyone knew this, and no one complained, but no one understood why the other class was only three credits. After all, students spent as much time in lectures there as they did in the other class?
“I don’t know, Tippi. I don’t know. That’s just the way law school is. In the words of Cat (No-Fly) Stevens, it’s a wild world.”
We drove on in silence, the snow slowly enveloping our thoughts.
Part Two: THE DARK
“This school’s too dark,” complained Tippi. “The walls are ugly brown and there’s no windows.”
We had arrived at Osgoode, and Tippi was confronted by its bleakness for the first time. I just shrugged. It was a common observation, and no one really knew the answer. But Tippi had an idea.
“Is that to counter the fact that 90% of the people here are white?”
Part Three: THE COLD
“Wow! It’s really cold here!” We had left Osgoode to get some lunch at York Lanes. It had been colder in the morning when we walked from the parking lot to the school, but Tippi had fallen asleep, so I tucked him into my school bag. Now, walking between buildings, he was getting a real sense of a snowy, slushy Canadian winter.
“How come you didn’t give me any long-johns or anything? It’s gotta’ be minus twenty-five or something! I’m a teddy bear, not a polar bear, although my uncle Ralph was made into a stuffed polar bear.”
“Sorry Tippi, I wasn’t thinking.” The guilt was overwhelming. I was wearing thermal underwear, two pairs of socks and a hat, and I didn’t give the poor little guy anything!
“Sorry! I’m a law student, and we only think of ourselves! I’ll make it up to you I promise!”
He just hugged himself tight and put his head down as we sloshed through the worst winter had to offer. Finally, he broke the silence.
“Do you know what the scientific name for polar bear is? Ursus maritimus.”
We walked on.
Part Four: FRIENDS
After a quiet lunch, we were spending a quiet afternoon reading in the mixing area. At least I was trying to read. Tippi was getting frustrated. He needed to talk to someone (teddy bears are inherently very sociable creatures). “Where are all your friends?” he asked, exasperated.
“Sorry? Friends?”
“Yeah, you know, friends. People you talk to and laugh with. You’re a handsome and smart and funny guy, so where are they?”
“Well, I have a few friends, but I don’t think that really happens at Osgoode. Most people just sort of keep to themselves and keep the friends they have outside of school. It’s a law school thing.” I turned back to my books.
Tippi, however, wasn’t satisfied. “What do you mean, it’s a law school thing? You had friends at the other law school? Why not here?”
“Well, most people here are pretty nice. They say please and thank you.”
“Forget nice, what about friends?”
“Umm…I guess…I suppose it’s because here, we all have to compete with each other. There, you get good marks if you do well. Here, you get good marks if you do better than everyone else. So when someone needs notes or something because they’re too sick to make it to class, they ask one of the Deans for help. And when the Dean asks students for notes, she has to tell them that no one else will see or use the notes. Otherwise, no one will give them to the sick kid. See what I mean?”
Tippi nodded, slowly digesting what I had just said. “I miss Ed. He was my friend,” said Tippi. “He helped me when I was sick.” I smiled and patted him on the head. Ed was his best friend in Ireland, but he stayed behind. They were real pals. What a nice little guy to remember him!
Part Five: STUBBORN ICE
It was almost ten when we left that night. It had been a long, tiring day, and neither one of us really wanted to step out into the dark and cold. A fresh layer of snow had fallen on the ground, and Tippi dragged his feet. Poor little guy, he was exhausted!
He stopped on the path that runs by the trees between Osgoode and Passy. Drained, he just plopped into the snow under the trees. Fortunately, he was all wrapped up in a scarf and had one of my socks for a hat.
“I just need to rest for a minute, it’s been a long day.” While he sat and rested, I checked my phone messages. When I turned around, I saw him in an argument with a squirrel. By the time I reached him, the squirrel had run off, cussing angrily.
I asked Tippi what had happened. “The squirrel was being really rude. He kept telling me to get out of here, that I didn’t belong around here because I’m not a real animal. He said only real bears are allowed here, not pretend ones.”
“Aww, I’m sorry pal. Don’t listen to him, he’s just really narrow-minded.”
Tippi looked up, and I could see he was smiling. “It’s okay,” he said. “When he stopped talking, I just told him he was a fake skunk in a fake forest, and that he had really bad breath. Then he got all angry and ran off.”
What a brave and smart little guy! We laughed and started walking again. We’re pals!