Whoa, where did April and May go?
It's about time I finally had a chance to update. I didn't write anything the entire month of April or May....I wanted to, but just never had the time, or was too tired, or had something to say but wasn't in the mood to write it all out. I want to start writing in my journal more when things are starting to happen. It's when I am most in tune with what is going on, more emotional about the situation I'm writing about, and the whole point of even starting this journal was to have the chance to write things down to help me work through them (while hopefully getting some feedback from some friends). I need to realize that each entry doesn't have to be a book or even that interesting, but everytime I feel like sitting down to write, I should just sit down and write what is on my mind. Who knows, I may even have a whole better perspective about the things on my mind. Or not. But I want to find out.
The most life changing thing that happened in the last few months was Dylan died. I am even balling my eyes out as I write this because I miss my puppy so much. I love her so much. She was 14 and hurting and tired and I know it was the right thing to do and that she is happy. I miss her so much, though. I miss coming home and having her greet me at the door, I miss watching TV together, I miss talking to her, I miss everything. We all miss her and love her so much.
Carline graduated this May! That was really cool. The weekend definitely had it's ups and downs, but it was really great. Billy Joel was the commencement speaker. It wasn't that great of a speech, but he was pretty funny and he sang a song that we all got to sing along with, so that was pretty cool. It was really cool to watch Carline and her friends graduate. It is also pretty scary that we're all starting to graduate. My friends and I have one more year (a few have a little longer), but then we have to go out into the real world, get jobs, start families of our own, go in different directions. It has freaked me out for a long time because I love having everyone together and being in one place with friends, but I know it won't last forever. I haven't exactly prepared myself, but I think what scares me the most is everyone branching off. I want to move to NYC and work in the music industry, but I am not sure which of my friends has plans to move to NYC as well. I think finding a job and getting out there and being in the real world is scary, but I think we'll all be fine. I'm so afraid of loosing touch with people. I agree with Carline and Emily that "we're not forming these great relationships just to throw them away after 4 or 5 years." That's my theory and you know me, I plan to hold true to it and put in such an effort but I'm really nervous. I'm not gonna get to see my friends for long periods of time and we'll all be in different places doing our own things and I just don't want days of not talking with each other and seeing each other to turn to weeks to months to years. I already feel like I am kinda alone and lonely, and I just don't want that to be true and be my whole life. I just hope everyone feels the same as I do about staying connected and I want every one of us to be successful and happy and living their dream lives.
Currently, I am just trying to get through co-op. It's become very stressful right now. We've been so behind, people are getting moody, people are getting petty, and I'm just at the point where I am done. I'm sick of hearing it and I'm tired of the inbox. I'm really starting to despise the inbox...being in it and answering emails all the time and worrying about it and de-spamming it, and being behind....it's all just not very appealing. I don't get paid anywhere near the ballpark of what my efforts and labor are worth. The job, in my opinion, is AT LEAST worth $10/hour. I make $250/every two weeks. And I work full time, pretty close to 40 hours a week easily. Five co-op jobs later, four that didn't even pay, one that pays peanuts, I am really frustrated that companies in the entertainment industry think they can put the word "intern" in a job title and then don't have to pay anything. Why do we agree to it? They tell us it's all for the experience but like Carline pointed out, "everything is an experience." I have engineering friends and pharmacy friends that would literaly laugh at your face in the interview if you offered them less than $15/hour. They don't understand the entertainment industry at all. But it isn't fair. I don't even have "intern" in my title (Member Relations Rep) and I work full time and still get paid junk. Isn't it supposed to be at least minimum wage if you're working full time? I think companies need to wake up and realize that we're not just anybody here. We're music industry majors, business minors, communication majors who have been studying the industry for years now. We can handle more than doing stupid, meaningless jobs and getting coffee. The major is becoming increasingly popular at universities and I think we are the point where companies can't just look at us and think just being in their presence is good enough experience. They can't look at us, qualified in the industry as we are, and think just anybody off the street can do what we are qualified to do. I don't mean to sound preachy, but it's not fair. I think we run into a little problem when my co-op advisor thinks the complete opposite of what I am saying but the entire major of students agrees with me. It's like nobody wants to fight for us. Don't tell me you understand that I have bills to pay or groceries to buy because if you truly undersotod, you would realize that we are doing a job just like anyone doing a job and we deserve to be paid decently for it. I would imagine that was why minimum wage laws were created. But you put the word "intern" in the job description and all of a sudden no rules apply, all bets off the table? That's just not right.
I'm basically ready for co-op to be over and then my family and I are going on vacation to Cedar Point in Ohio. I am very excited because we are golfing, horseback riding, going to the amusement park, going to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and relaxing. I really need to relax. People see me sleep in very rarely and very occasionally and think I have it easy and relaxed all the time. Not true. I have been very stressed lately, very overworked, and in much need of relaxation. All I have wanted to do is just play golf. It's all I want to do. I can't wait to finish co-op and just play golf and do practivally nothing for Summer 2. Sonicbids is working on setting me up with a job for my senior year, which I will accept because I don't want the stress of looking for another job when I have graduating and getting a career started to think about. I'll only accept it if it pays nicely. But for the most part, I am relaxing and taking a much needed break this Summer 2 and getting prepared for senior year. I think during Summer 2 I am going to start my job search for after graduation. Carline and Sophie have been working on their searches and I see how rough it can be, so I think it is best to start early, especially while I will have all the extra time.
But relaxing will definitely be happening....I may not remember exactly how to relax, but I'm sure a few days sleeping in and a few rounds of golf and it'll all come back to me. :)
The most life changing thing that happened in the last few months was Dylan died. I am even balling my eyes out as I write this because I miss my puppy so much. I love her so much. She was 14 and hurting and tired and I know it was the right thing to do and that she is happy. I miss her so much, though. I miss coming home and having her greet me at the door, I miss watching TV together, I miss talking to her, I miss everything. We all miss her and love her so much.
Carline graduated this May! That was really cool. The weekend definitely had it's ups and downs, but it was really great. Billy Joel was the commencement speaker. It wasn't that great of a speech, but he was pretty funny and he sang a song that we all got to sing along with, so that was pretty cool. It was really cool to watch Carline and her friends graduate. It is also pretty scary that we're all starting to graduate. My friends and I have one more year (a few have a little longer), but then we have to go out into the real world, get jobs, start families of our own, go in different directions. It has freaked me out for a long time because I love having everyone together and being in one place with friends, but I know it won't last forever. I haven't exactly prepared myself, but I think what scares me the most is everyone branching off. I want to move to NYC and work in the music industry, but I am not sure which of my friends has plans to move to NYC as well. I think finding a job and getting out there and being in the real world is scary, but I think we'll all be fine. I'm so afraid of loosing touch with people. I agree with Carline and Emily that "we're not forming these great relationships just to throw them away after 4 or 5 years." That's my theory and you know me, I plan to hold true to it and put in such an effort but I'm really nervous. I'm not gonna get to see my friends for long periods of time and we'll all be in different places doing our own things and I just don't want days of not talking with each other and seeing each other to turn to weeks to months to years. I already feel like I am kinda alone and lonely, and I just don't want that to be true and be my whole life. I just hope everyone feels the same as I do about staying connected and I want every one of us to be successful and happy and living their dream lives.
Currently, I am just trying to get through co-op. It's become very stressful right now. We've been so behind, people are getting moody, people are getting petty, and I'm just at the point where I am done. I'm sick of hearing it and I'm tired of the inbox. I'm really starting to despise the inbox...being in it and answering emails all the time and worrying about it and de-spamming it, and being behind....it's all just not very appealing. I don't get paid anywhere near the ballpark of what my efforts and labor are worth. The job, in my opinion, is AT LEAST worth $10/hour. I make $250/every two weeks. And I work full time, pretty close to 40 hours a week easily. Five co-op jobs later, four that didn't even pay, one that pays peanuts, I am really frustrated that companies in the entertainment industry think they can put the word "intern" in a job title and then don't have to pay anything. Why do we agree to it? They tell us it's all for the experience but like Carline pointed out, "everything is an experience." I have engineering friends and pharmacy friends that would literaly laugh at your face in the interview if you offered them less than $15/hour. They don't understand the entertainment industry at all. But it isn't fair. I don't even have "intern" in my title (Member Relations Rep) and I work full time and still get paid junk. Isn't it supposed to be at least minimum wage if you're working full time? I think companies need to wake up and realize that we're not just anybody here. We're music industry majors, business minors, communication majors who have been studying the industry for years now. We can handle more than doing stupid, meaningless jobs and getting coffee. The major is becoming increasingly popular at universities and I think we are the point where companies can't just look at us and think just being in their presence is good enough experience. They can't look at us, qualified in the industry as we are, and think just anybody off the street can do what we are qualified to do. I don't mean to sound preachy, but it's not fair. I think we run into a little problem when my co-op advisor thinks the complete opposite of what I am saying but the entire major of students agrees with me. It's like nobody wants to fight for us. Don't tell me you understand that I have bills to pay or groceries to buy because if you truly undersotod, you would realize that we are doing a job just like anyone doing a job and we deserve to be paid decently for it. I would imagine that was why minimum wage laws were created. But you put the word "intern" in the job description and all of a sudden no rules apply, all bets off the table? That's just not right.
I'm basically ready for co-op to be over and then my family and I are going on vacation to Cedar Point in Ohio. I am very excited because we are golfing, horseback riding, going to the amusement park, going to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and relaxing. I really need to relax. People see me sleep in very rarely and very occasionally and think I have it easy and relaxed all the time. Not true. I have been very stressed lately, very overworked, and in much need of relaxation. All I have wanted to do is just play golf. It's all I want to do. I can't wait to finish co-op and just play golf and do practivally nothing for Summer 2. Sonicbids is working on setting me up with a job for my senior year, which I will accept because I don't want the stress of looking for another job when I have graduating and getting a career started to think about. I'll only accept it if it pays nicely. But for the most part, I am relaxing and taking a much needed break this Summer 2 and getting prepared for senior year. I think during Summer 2 I am going to start my job search for after graduation. Carline and Sophie have been working on their searches and I see how rough it can be, so I think it is best to start early, especially while I will have all the extra time.
But relaxing will definitely be happening....I may not remember exactly how to relax, but I'm sure a few days sleeping in and a few rounds of golf and it'll all come back to me. :)