(no subject)
Today I started wondering how I come off to people.
The other day, Spazz and I were chatting about my plans for later that night or week...or something. He asked me about what Adam was doing and I said I wasn't entirely sure, but most likely working. He questioned whether or not that bothered me. When I told him that it didn't, I'm a fairly independent person and while I do enjoy the time I get to spend with Adam, I don't NEED to be with him at all possible times, he said - in that over-the-top-ridiculous-sarcastic-asshole-way that only Spazz can, "YOU!? YOU are INDEPENDENT!? WHAAAAAT!?! I NEVER would have guessed in a million years! I am SHOCKED!" Jerk.
Anyone that knows me knows how I feel about inconsiderate men that date my friends. I tend to feel... negatively toward them. Okay, fine, homicidal. And everyone knows that stems from my being married to one of those inconsiderate (boy, what an understatement!) men. I can deal with the occasional complaint, but when childish, selfish, asshole, ignorant behavior becomes a trend, I get angry. I persisted through a relationship where I never knew what he was going to be like when I got home. Was he going to hand me a drink or throw a plate at me? Was he going to hug me or bombard me at the door with shouting? Was he going to have dinner ready or would he even be there at all that night? I was a nervous wreck whenever he was around and eventually, even when I knew I was going to have to be around him. That's not a proper way to live.
I don't hate men. Only the crappy ones that think the world revolves around them. But I hate chicks like that too. So maybe I just hate selfish people? I'm generally not concerned with how other perceive me, but I do hope I don't come off as some man-hating, "I don't need no man; I do what I want!" bitch.
I don't even know where I was going with this. Move along!