The Quotable Beckett is rated "R"

[airin61]

Josh Beckett will not be outdone by Kevin Youkilis.

Hi, I'm Josh Beckett.



A few of my crazy scary insane imaginative fans were discussing things that I do or do not do, so I thought I'd better set the record straight for y'all.

I do have fun with my teammates.





I do not enjoy press conferences. (Especially when the questions are lame and/or stupid.)



I do enjoy hunting.



I do not enjoy parades.



I do like it when that Ellsbury kid wins me a free taco.



I do not care for "Dancing with the Red Sox" (especially when Pap is wearing a scary-ass outfit.)



I do like football.





I do not like off days. (Especially if the other guys aren't executing their pitches.)





I do enjoy a party.





Under the right circumstances I do not totally hate guest appearances. (Acceptable situations: things that have to do with Texas, kids, or the President. In that order.)







Obviously I do enjoy executing pitches.





I especially enjoy throwing f'ing strikes.


I do not start fights. But if they happen to break out near me?





That's all I have to say. Let me know if you have any questions.



To the 2.5 of you who care: Happy joshBECKETT day!