(no subject)
Work wasn't too bad for a minute. There was no power so we sold books out of the front door. The caste structure was dormant. Then at some point, the power came back on and the corporate heart started beating. It pumped its blood through the veins of my coworkers. The well-oiled machine revived almost instantly.
My boss never like my ideas much. I didn't hide them. So now I pretend I'm my Mother and everything works out fine. I didn't have to work for several days due to the threat of hurricane Francis. Also, my boyfriend's sister was visiting from CA. So we were all stuck in our mini apartment castle. His mother and her boyfriend also made an appearance. Really, it was bliss in one way. His sister doesn't particularly favor me. Good thing we're not courting, she and I. She's a blonde-haired beast anyway. Girls seems to fawn over Brett's brother. He is/was the lead singer for their band. Yes, he is definitely talented but an insecure bastard.... I realize I have recently become depressed...and repressed. Because of Ryan's insecurity and the fact that he is my roommate, I have to hide who I am. I hide who I am in every way. But...I used to feel sorry for him. Until I found out why his sister doesn't like me, that is. He thinks I have taken his life away by destroying his band. Then he tells everyone he meets this. The truth is, I have always encouraged my boyfriend to continue working with his 'band' because I think it's (in a very minimalist perspective) a good investment. I can't say that about most music and the musicians who perform it. But now, I have heard Ryan's theories and while I will not voice my opinion, I am no longer supportive of this band. I will not encourage or discourage anything. I really like who I am. I really dislike people who don't know me and fill in the blanks with their own ideas. If we had judges and juries like that....well, at least we wouldn't have population problems.
I received an email from Alex. It was short. I wish I had more friends. I have become so much of a loner.
I also received an email from Eddie Toll, a childhood friend my mother used to babysit. He is a writer and apparently doesn't like to be reachable. So he fled to New Zealand and dumped his girlfriend. Or something like that. I remember him as a boy. He seemed so...boyish. Is writing feminine? It doesn't look that way if one reads Pound. But I don't read Pound. I would pound on his head. I have read some interesting perspectives regarding his emptiness. I formulate my own opinions. Not everyone can like everything.
I also found I avoid inconoclasts. No wonder I hate Vonnegut. Here, I open myself to thrashing. You know, for having opinions.
I have been really positive over the last year. I really just needed a break from it.
I rarely sing because I have been afraid of making Ryan's 'condition' worse. I sing a lot everywhere else. Mostly things I make up. Maybe I should stay depressed. Luckily, my voice records very well. Even when there are no effects on it. I have to work today.
I have really become interested in the Tudors. I now am going to read a book about Anne Boleyn's daughter, Elizabeth. Funny how Henry cast Anne aside and accused him of witchcraft for sucking him off and other ridiculous trumped up charges, meanwhile Her daughter became one the greatest Queens's while Jane's Edward VI...yeah whatever.
My boss never like my ideas much. I didn't hide them. So now I pretend I'm my Mother and everything works out fine. I didn't have to work for several days due to the threat of hurricane Francis. Also, my boyfriend's sister was visiting from CA. So we were all stuck in our mini apartment castle. His mother and her boyfriend also made an appearance. Really, it was bliss in one way. His sister doesn't particularly favor me. Good thing we're not courting, she and I. She's a blonde-haired beast anyway. Girls seems to fawn over Brett's brother. He is/was the lead singer for their band. Yes, he is definitely talented but an insecure bastard.... I realize I have recently become depressed...and repressed. Because of Ryan's insecurity and the fact that he is my roommate, I have to hide who I am. I hide who I am in every way. But...I used to feel sorry for him. Until I found out why his sister doesn't like me, that is. He thinks I have taken his life away by destroying his band. Then he tells everyone he meets this. The truth is, I have always encouraged my boyfriend to continue working with his 'band' because I think it's (in a very minimalist perspective) a good investment. I can't say that about most music and the musicians who perform it. But now, I have heard Ryan's theories and while I will not voice my opinion, I am no longer supportive of this band. I will not encourage or discourage anything. I really like who I am. I really dislike people who don't know me and fill in the blanks with their own ideas. If we had judges and juries like that....well, at least we wouldn't have population problems.
I received an email from Alex. It was short. I wish I had more friends. I have become so much of a loner.
I also received an email from Eddie Toll, a childhood friend my mother used to babysit. He is a writer and apparently doesn't like to be reachable. So he fled to New Zealand and dumped his girlfriend. Or something like that. I remember him as a boy. He seemed so...boyish. Is writing feminine? It doesn't look that way if one reads Pound. But I don't read Pound. I would pound on his head. I have read some interesting perspectives regarding his emptiness. I formulate my own opinions. Not everyone can like everything.
I also found I avoid inconoclasts. No wonder I hate Vonnegut. Here, I open myself to thrashing. You know, for having opinions.
I have been really positive over the last year. I really just needed a break from it.
I rarely sing because I have been afraid of making Ryan's 'condition' worse. I sing a lot everywhere else. Mostly things I make up. Maybe I should stay depressed. Luckily, my voice records very well. Even when there are no effects on it. I have to work today.
I have really become interested in the Tudors. I now am going to read a book about Anne Boleyn's daughter, Elizabeth. Funny how Henry cast Anne aside and accused him of witchcraft for sucking him off and other ridiculous trumped up charges, meanwhile Her daughter became one the greatest Queens's while Jane's Edward VI...yeah whatever.