Mustering all of my faith in God

[ainsleymeadows]

Sometimes when the world seems to get us down, it feels like God either doesn't want to listen or has learned to not care about us anymore. However, I do not believe that. I know without a shadow of doubt that God has only given us trials that are at the time incredibly hard and we may think that we do not have the strength to get through it, but indeed we do, for God only blesses us with trials that we are capable of handling and at the end of things has only served to make us stronger. For instance, my relationship with my current boyfriend I have fought so hard and for so long to keep us together and inspite of all my friends who were against us on the onset of our relationship I have turned it around so that they supported me, for they only truly wanted to see me happy. And having had my heart broken constantly this year over one thing or another, they were overprotective. As I would be for any friend of mine in the same situation. However, enough was enough with them and it needed to come to an end. And it did. I honestly thought this time things were different, I knew that it was going to take me quite a while to completely trust someone again, and indeed it has. But never in my entire life have I ever trusted a man so openly, completely, and with every fiber of my being. I trusted him with the very life in my body. I didn't know that would ever be possible for me, especially not after this last year of my life. And love, oh heavens, I never and I quite honestly never loved someone so much. Especially since I have not been in this relationship long. I was happy, of course I know that every relationship is going to have its hard times, and sometimes those hard times are enough to rip two people who love each other apart; but as long as you hold onto that love things will indeed be okay. Keep the trust in God, and continue to be each others support; each others solid rock, that when an earthquake happens, things won't allow to shake up that rock. A few birds may come by and decided to use the same rock as its shiting place, but eventually comes the rain to wash away the shit. Thus, in a relationship when the shit comes, hold on for not too long in coming comes the rain, the rain that will instead will becoming as the healing, the hand in help that may be needed at the time. However, the birds will have the last laugh if instead you give up during the hard times, not everything is meant to be easy, its only supposed to be worth it. Take for instance, the time it took for me to learn to walk straight as a little kid, instead of crooked like my pigeoned-toed feet wanted me too. Or how about the fact that it took me until the third grade in order to read, it was a hard struggle to learn to read but one that was well worth it, for I indeed love to read now. I am an avid reader now, and just to think that I once had to struggle so hard in order to get to where I am now.
I firmly believe that my relationship is no different, especially this one. I love this man, in fact in the mormon faith we firmly believe that family is eternal, not just for this world. And I would be eternally happy and grateful, if I could but spend eternity with him. That is correct, if I could ever ask, ever say it, I would ask now and forever, if not to late and if he ever reads this, Christopher, would you marry me, not now, but when we both are ready?