Update
So life isn't going to horrible. I have learned that taking my own advice is one of the toughest things to do because when you are wallowing in self pity you can't think of the wondrous and wise things you said to everyone else. In this case its fix what you can and move on. I can't change feelings, beliefs, or the choices people have made. All I can do is control myself and let that be enough. When you hear what people really think of you it sucks, that is something I can usually change but for some reason I can't this time. The funny thing is I know whats happening is the right thing but I can't help but be selfish. My what an asshole I am.