(no subject)
Apparantly I'm a bad person or something? I'm not sure. I don't think that I am. I mean, I could be so much worse. Yeah, I'm a decent person. I guess that I'm just trying to convince myself but at the same time, yeah, I believe it. Does that make any sense? People have been putting me down for thinking good thoughts about myself & I don't really understand why anyone would want to do that.
*****Xcore: you think so highly of yourself.
Trust me, that was meant to be negative. Oh well.
My dad told me that I've lost weight from walking so much in Florida. He said that if I continue to walk every day, that I'll lose more weight. I told him that I didn't really want to lose weight & that I just want to be the way I've always been; before Florida. He looked puzzled & suggested that I do. Lately it's been so hard for people to understand that I'm happy with myself. I'm not as insecure as I used to be. Just accept it & move on. I'm comfortable with myself, so you should be comfortable with me.
I've also realized that I really dislike being alone. I mean things are good, I'm being selfish for complainging. It's just weird; not having some boy to call & complain about my not-so-perfect day to. & now I get crushes on everyone, or I think that I get crushes on everyone, or something. It's really dumb. I don't really like it too much.
I've been reminding myself of how I was in eighth/ninth grade. I guess that in some ways, I'm still that person. But I'm so different now & I've grown so much & I don't want to go back to being that way. I don't like certain parts of that person, & those parts are coming back into play, & I don't remember how I got rid of them in the first place...