They say time with make all this go away..
Notes taken after rehearsal today:
-Act better.
How depressing. Not only did I fuck up my whole three lines, but after the run I felt that familiar stabbing pain again, although this time it encompassed my entire chest cavity instead of one direct location. I had no choice but to curl up into a ball in order to breathe. I’m such a fucking baby, but I’m seriously tired of this pain. I don’t remember what it was like before it happened…And…I’m too stubborn to even think about going to that godforsaken hospital again.
And it’s not just that… although the mere thought of the events leading up to that sickens me… it’s everything else I simply cannot manage.
Someone teach me to direct my rage triggered by jealousy toward something else… beside myself and/or my lungs. Please?
-Act better.
How depressing. Not only did I fuck up my whole three lines, but after the run I felt that familiar stabbing pain again, although this time it encompassed my entire chest cavity instead of one direct location. I had no choice but to curl up into a ball in order to breathe. I’m such a fucking baby, but I’m seriously tired of this pain. I don’t remember what it was like before it happened…And…I’m too stubborn to even think about going to that godforsaken hospital again.
And it’s not just that… although the mere thought of the events leading up to that sickens me… it’s everything else I simply cannot manage.
Someone teach me to direct my rage triggered by jealousy toward something else… beside myself and/or my lungs. Please?