thetenspot: The Good vs. The Bad.
Two in one. One was too gloomy to stand on its own even if that'd be exactly how I'm feeling, and the other one was just too...positive for how I'm feeling. The only logical thing was doing this.
The ten good things:
1. I'm a damn good cook.
2. I'm very loyal. I may not be very friendly, but if there's something no one can fault me on is me being loyal to someone.
3. I'm honest and say what I think about a certain situation; I rarely sugar-coat anything. I may not be very pleasant to someone because of how honest I can be, but beating around the bush just doesn't do it for me.
4. I'd do anything to protect the ones I love. Kinda goes along with the loyal thing, but ah well.
5. I don't really care what other people think about me unless your name is Tess, Orlando, Hannah or DJ. Might be a bad thing to some, I guess, but it's a good thing for me.
6. I don't give up. Ever, even when I know I should and I'm fighting a losing battle. Quitting is just never an option.
7. Throughout the years I've developed a strong sense of discipline, and I'm proud of it. I think it makes me different from most thugs I used to work with, somehow.
8. My name. I actually like my name, even if Michael is just too damn common. And Beck... It's my real 'inheritance' from my grandfather.
9. My ability to survive. Is it weird that I list that? But what can I say, I am proud of it. I'm supposed to be dead by now, after everything I've done and have gone through - how can I not be proud of it?
10. And since I'm having a hard time coming up with the tenth one... I like the fact that I know damn well how to shoot a gun. I know how to defend myself without firearms, no problem, but if the guns come out then you better get the fuck out of my way. I rarely have bad aim. Sixteen years of practice does that to you.
The ten bad things:
1. What I've done, and what I do, puts the ones I love in danger. There are no words that can say how much I hate this.
2. I never feel like what I do is good enough.
3. I have a self-destructive behavior.
4. I hold grudges very easily, and there's no such thing as "forgive and forget" with me. In some cases I don't care, but in others I do since it makes me jeopardize relationships I don't want to lose.
5. So many things in my life are lies and secrets that I don't even know what's real anymore.
6. I have more issues than I can count. And no, I'm not going to name them. If you know me, then you know, and that's enough for me.
7. ...oh, yeah. I'm secretive. To the point of not even being able to be completely honest with the ones I care about, which is what I hate, but I've been this way since I was a kid. Lousy excuse, but can't find any other reason for it.
8. Speaking of lousy, I've been a fuckin' lousy uncle. It's not all my fault, since DJ's kids don't exactly want me in their lives, but I can't help but feel like I haven't done enough for them.
9. I push away the ones I care about. Especially when I need them. Like now. Something else I've always done.
10. No matter how much I say I've changed, truth is that I haven't. Worst part is that sometimes I'm actually okay with that.
The ten good things:
1. I'm a damn good cook.
2. I'm very loyal. I may not be very friendly, but if there's something no one can fault me on is me being loyal to someone.
3. I'm honest and say what I think about a certain situation; I rarely sugar-coat anything. I may not be very pleasant to someone because of how honest I can be, but beating around the bush just doesn't do it for me.
4. I'd do anything to protect the ones I love. Kinda goes along with the loyal thing, but ah well.
5. I don't really care what other people think about me unless your name is Tess, Orlando, Hannah or DJ. Might be a bad thing to some, I guess, but it's a good thing for me.
6. I don't give up. Ever, even when I know I should and I'm fighting a losing battle. Quitting is just never an option.
7. Throughout the years I've developed a strong sense of discipline, and I'm proud of it. I think it makes me different from most thugs I used to work with, somehow.
8. My name. I actually like my name, even if Michael is just too damn common. And Beck... It's my real 'inheritance' from my grandfather.
9. My ability to survive. Is it weird that I list that? But what can I say, I am proud of it. I'm supposed to be dead by now, after everything I've done and have gone through - how can I not be proud of it?
10. And since I'm having a hard time coming up with the tenth one... I like the fact that I know damn well how to shoot a gun. I know how to defend myself without firearms, no problem, but if the guns come out then you better get the fuck out of my way. I rarely have bad aim. Sixteen years of practice does that to you.
The ten bad things:
1. What I've done, and what I do, puts the ones I love in danger. There are no words that can say how much I hate this.
2. I never feel like what I do is good enough.
3. I have a self-destructive behavior.
4. I hold grudges very easily, and there's no such thing as "forgive and forget" with me. In some cases I don't care, but in others I do since it makes me jeopardize relationships I don't want to lose.
5. So many things in my life are lies and secrets that I don't even know what's real anymore.
6. I have more issues than I can count. And no, I'm not going to name them. If you know me, then you know, and that's enough for me.
7. ...oh, yeah. I'm secretive. To the point of not even being able to be completely honest with the ones I care about, which is what I hate, but I've been this way since I was a kid. Lousy excuse, but can't find any other reason for it.
8. Speaking of lousy, I've been a fuckin' lousy uncle. It's not all my fault, since DJ's kids don't exactly want me in their lives, but I can't help but feel like I haven't done enough for them.
9. I push away the ones I care about. Especially when I need them. Like now. Something else I've always done.
10. No matter how much I say I've changed, truth is that I haven't. Worst part is that sometimes I'm actually okay with that.