A light at the end of the tunnel.
Michael still remembers how, when he was younger, his grandfather would always try to keep positive even in the worst of situations. If money was short a certain month, he'd just try to make the situation lighter than what it really was and would reassure Michael that everything would pass.
"Soon," Ben would tell him, "everything will be over, and we'll look back on this and realize that things weren't as hard as we once thought they were. You will be surprised, son. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel."
Sometimes his grandfather had been right, other times he really hadn't been, but his grandfather's never-ending hope did manage to always help them get through whatever was troubling them.
The first week after Michael quit heroin just a little over a month ago, Michael had been almost sure that he'd go back to his habit and eventually overdose somewhere in Brooklyn, or in Long Island. Sometimes he'd be hopeful, though, and he'd try to keep himself positive how Ben had done for him the first time he had quit heroin, but he had never quite realized how hard it was to do it by himself. Or, at least, it was extremely hard to be hopeful when reality was giving him a hard slap in the face every time he'd wake, and every time he'd lay awake during the night as he battled another craving.
One night, however, after Michael had woken up with a high fever and trembling as his body demanded more heroin, he had found Elise sitting next to him as she tried to soothe him. He tried to fight her off at first, not wanting anybody to see how he was, but Elise hadn't moved and Michael's strength to keep fighting her off just diminished in a second anyway. She had been wanting to be that something she had never been to him, she had wanted a chance to be his mother, and that night she had taken it. She sat with him, and she talked quietly while he tried to concentrate on something other than the way his body felt as if it was being set on fire from the inside.
It didn't take long before Michael started feeling worn out again and started to fall asleep, and it was then that he had heard her. Her voice had been quiet, and filled with anguish as she watched her son suffer through heroin withdrawal, but her words had given him a reassurance that he had needed more than he had realized. "Soon it'll all be over," she promised as her hand rubbed his back gently, as if it'd help soothe him. "Soon everything will pass. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel, remember?"
Of course he remembered, he wanted to answer. He had grown up with those words being uttered to him more times than he could have counted - how did she expect him to not remember? Instead, though, he just nodded, knowing that Elise had probably heard those same words from Ben - after all, they had been raised by the same man.
Those words meant, and still mean, more to him than Michael has ever told Elise. Things didn't quite get easier right away, but they have gotten easier as time has started to pass. Every now and then he's still fighting off cravings, although smaller than the first ones, but now it's nothing he doesn't feel he can't control.
Now he has other things he has to go up against, new challenges and new trials that he knows he has to face in the new life he's going to be starting once more, but a hope that had died almost five years ago is finally lit now. It's still very dimly lit, but lit nonetheless. He doesn't know how long it'll last, but he does know he'll make the most of it.
For the first time in years, it finally feels as if he's closer to that end of the tunnel.
"Soon," Ben would tell him, "everything will be over, and we'll look back on this and realize that things weren't as hard as we once thought they were. You will be surprised, son. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel."
Sometimes his grandfather had been right, other times he really hadn't been, but his grandfather's never-ending hope did manage to always help them get through whatever was troubling them.
The first week after Michael quit heroin just a little over a month ago, Michael had been almost sure that he'd go back to his habit and eventually overdose somewhere in Brooklyn, or in Long Island. Sometimes he'd be hopeful, though, and he'd try to keep himself positive how Ben had done for him the first time he had quit heroin, but he had never quite realized how hard it was to do it by himself. Or, at least, it was extremely hard to be hopeful when reality was giving him a hard slap in the face every time he'd wake, and every time he'd lay awake during the night as he battled another craving.
One night, however, after Michael had woken up with a high fever and trembling as his body demanded more heroin, he had found Elise sitting next to him as she tried to soothe him. He tried to fight her off at first, not wanting anybody to see how he was, but Elise hadn't moved and Michael's strength to keep fighting her off just diminished in a second anyway. She had been wanting to be that something she had never been to him, she had wanted a chance to be his mother, and that night she had taken it. She sat with him, and she talked quietly while he tried to concentrate on something other than the way his body felt as if it was being set on fire from the inside.
It didn't take long before Michael started feeling worn out again and started to fall asleep, and it was then that he had heard her. Her voice had been quiet, and filled with anguish as she watched her son suffer through heroin withdrawal, but her words had given him a reassurance that he had needed more than he had realized. "Soon it'll all be over," she promised as her hand rubbed his back gently, as if it'd help soothe him. "Soon everything will pass. There's always a light at the end of the tunnel, remember?"
Of course he remembered, he wanted to answer. He had grown up with those words being uttered to him more times than he could have counted - how did she expect him to not remember? Instead, though, he just nodded, knowing that Elise had probably heard those same words from Ben - after all, they had been raised by the same man.
Those words meant, and still mean, more to him than Michael has ever told Elise. Things didn't quite get easier right away, but they have gotten easier as time has started to pass. Every now and then he's still fighting off cravings, although smaller than the first ones, but now it's nothing he doesn't feel he can't control.
Now he has other things he has to go up against, new challenges and new trials that he knows he has to face in the new life he's going to be starting once more, but a hope that had died almost five years ago is finally lit now. It's still very dimly lit, but lit nonetheless. He doesn't know how long it'll last, but he does know he'll make the most of it.
For the first time in years, it finally feels as if he's closer to that end of the tunnel.