Crazy lazy days

Feb 28, 2012 19:37

So I'm sick again (lovely) and it was worse with the exception that I didn't have a massive panic attack when I went to the ER because I knew somewhat knew what was going on this time. I literally went from my first bout with stomach issues to a massive respiratory cold/infection back to stomach issues. They started back up just as the hellacious cough went away. Started with a feeling that something was going on in my throat which lead to worthless antibiotics (since it wasn't bacterial) which probably tore up my stomach & when those didn't work and I came down with a fever in Ohio (while I was home for my college roommate's surprise bday party), it was off to another doctor who gave me an even stronger antibiotic that tore up my stomach even more. Got back to LA on a Tues, back to the Urgent care on a Friday, doctor gives me a shot of prednisone to take down the swelling in my throat and a drug to keep me from being so nauseous from the antibiotics. The next Tues (beginning of Feb), I had an appointment with my new primary doctor and tell her something feels stuck in my throat to the point I can barely even eat soft foods & she pretty much blows me off like some ignorant welfare case. (that's what you deal with when you don't have health insurance). She gives me some freaking prescription zantac, clairitin and vitamins because she's a "conservative doctor" and doesn't want to run any tests on me nevermind I told her I've been dealing with this on and off for like 3 months now. At least she had the decency to give me zoloft as well. "it's just stress." (yeah that's why it's still here. watch as I roll my eyes). "come back in a month and go get these blood test in 3 weeks" (apparently she also wasn't listening to me when I told her I just had complete blood work done in November)

Well a little over 24 hours later, I wind up back in the ER with massive stomach gurgling, pain and belching again. I couldn't even drink water without it killing me. They look as far down my throat as they can without a scope (they find nothing especially where i say it hurts: behind my right tonsil). Gave me industrial strength Maalox-type acid reducer to drink (it was the grossest nastiest stuff ever, I almost puked it up), ran extensive blood & urine tests (gallbladder, liver, pancreas all came back clean. everything came back clean) & sent me on my way. it's not fun being at the ER until 5am....and I'm supposed to leave for New Jersey a couple days later to finally meet my boyfriend's family. Now that was in jeopardy too. Well until I called the airline and realized what dicks they were going to be if I tried to change/cancel my flight (this is why I almost always try to fly southwest, but this time I couldn't). Somehow I muster the strength to work through all of this too....I've only missed one shift of work through all of this crap and that was the first time i went to the ER in November.

So once again I'm on this limited diet of no tomato, no spicy, no citrus, no caffeine, no alcohol, no chocolate, no fried/fatty food. I have a crap ton of pills to take every day (though I'm weaning myself off the anti-anxiety that i was only supposed to take for the 2-4 weeks until the zoloft kicked in). The zoloft tears my stomach up as well, so I still feel nauseous at times and the whole week I was in New jersey, it would make me "pass out while standing" tired about 4 hours after I took it (thank god that passed, though it stopped right when i wanted it to work...on the 6-hr flight back to LA). I've also had to stop auditioning so now I'm not even acting, modeling or doing any standup. It sucks because i finally got called into a couple commercial casting offices that I've been trying to get into for like 2 years now and I had to pass on an audition with a director who I already worked for as well. It's kind of my own fault though because as soon as I felt slightly better the first time, I went all gung ho and well, shocker....I got sick again. (my therapist says it's because I don't "embrace my feelings and feel them")

So my days pretty much consist of getting up, eating so I can take my medicine, sitting around the house doing nothing or just doing household chores, walking the dog, watching tv, playing on the internet and reading magazines....oh and eating so i can take more meds. Can't really go out with my friends because what fun are restaurants or bars if you can't eat or drink anything? Can't go hiking with them because I'm not sure i can do strenuous workouts yet. Oh yeah....my throat still hurts.

I go back to the doctor next Thursday and this Thursday is my THIRD round of blood tests in 3 months. I should just go get the results from the other 2 times and say "here, I think I've volunteered enough of my blood lately for testing". I swear if she talks down to me this time like I'm some uneducated jobless welfare case, I'm going to inform her that I have not one, but TWO college degrees and that i'm not stupid. I just want to get back to being awesome again and doing the things I love....like eating and drinking like NORMAL human being.

Finally, I also am on call for jury duty all of this week? SERIOUSLY!??! I thought we were done with the bullshit on 12/31/11...come on!
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