(no subject)
I think that for a lot of people (women), filling every box on the side of the Starbucks cup creates a feeling of self-importance. Like if you drink a drink that is complex and original enough that it has 6 pumps of vanilla instead of 5, the fact that your life means nothing and is worth nothing hurts less.
What I'm saying is that while working at Starbucks is fun, and I love my coworker, it's also infuriating because of the arrogance of the clientelle. I work with the same person every day (Todd) who is hilarious because he actually tells customers his opinions of them, only they think he's joking. Nothing is more satisfying than hating someone and watching your coworker do the task of ridiculing them for you, without them even understanding. It gives me my own moment of self-importance, I suppose. I might work for Starbucks, but I don't live for MONEY! I am SO much cooler than you!!!
Things in Colorado could be a lot better. But they're not so horrible as to send me running home quite yet. I've learned an awful lot out here. I've learned that relationships are harder than I thought, and I already thought they were hard. I learned that I had no idea who I was or where I'm going, and I'm not certain I do yet.
Anyways, life out here is boring. I have no social life, because I don't really have any friends. But I can't really go out at night, because I start work at 7 am 5 days a week, and work nights at Il Vicino still. I'm making a lot of money, so it's good to be getting out of debt and crawling out of that hole, but it sucks to never see anybody. Nichole has been calling me and trying to be my friend, but I keep ditching her because I have to sleep because I don't really ever get the chance to except in slots where hanging out should.
Gosh.
I miss everyone at home so much. There is no doubt in my mind that I will be back there, though I really don't know when. As early as October if things here continue on this slope, maybe December, maybe March, maybe June. Those are the options. What I can't promise, though, is that I'll stay. Being out here has also made me realize my dreams a little more clearly, and they still do encompass Chicago. I don't know when that will happen though. Perhaps I'll go to UNM and then move there for grad school. What I do know is that I have to go there if I have any hope of being happy about my decisions.
What I'm saying is that while working at Starbucks is fun, and I love my coworker, it's also infuriating because of the arrogance of the clientelle. I work with the same person every day (Todd) who is hilarious because he actually tells customers his opinions of them, only they think he's joking. Nothing is more satisfying than hating someone and watching your coworker do the task of ridiculing them for you, without them even understanding. It gives me my own moment of self-importance, I suppose. I might work for Starbucks, but I don't live for MONEY! I am SO much cooler than you!!!
Things in Colorado could be a lot better. But they're not so horrible as to send me running home quite yet. I've learned an awful lot out here. I've learned that relationships are harder than I thought, and I already thought they were hard. I learned that I had no idea who I was or where I'm going, and I'm not certain I do yet.
Anyways, life out here is boring. I have no social life, because I don't really have any friends. But I can't really go out at night, because I start work at 7 am 5 days a week, and work nights at Il Vicino still. I'm making a lot of money, so it's good to be getting out of debt and crawling out of that hole, but it sucks to never see anybody. Nichole has been calling me and trying to be my friend, but I keep ditching her because I have to sleep because I don't really ever get the chance to except in slots where hanging out should.
Gosh.
I miss everyone at home so much. There is no doubt in my mind that I will be back there, though I really don't know when. As early as October if things here continue on this slope, maybe December, maybe March, maybe June. Those are the options. What I can't promise, though, is that I'll stay. Being out here has also made me realize my dreams a little more clearly, and they still do encompass Chicago. I don't know when that will happen though. Perhaps I'll go to UNM and then move there for grad school. What I do know is that I have to go there if I have any hope of being happy about my decisions.