[YamaChii] The Heart that Cries
Title: The Heart that Cries
Author: Ai no Messeji
Pairing: YamaChii; OkaJima; YamaJima; OkaChii [Friendship]
Genre: Drama, Romance, Slice of Life
Summary: …and because he loves him so much, that even when the world is crushing down on him. He only gives his sweetest and most treasured smile. Even though deep inside, if you look inside his heart, it cries and yearns for nothing more but everything that he cannot have.
True Love comes with a price.
It always comes with the greatest sacrifice.
And that sacrifice is…
It is learning how to smile, even if deep inside…
…the heart yearns and cries.
…
Seeing them together, seeing them hold hands and laugh, it brought a certain kind of ache inside of Yuri’s heart. But as a person who loves, he just accepted it with everything that he has. Because his smile- his Yamada Ryosuke’s heartwarming and gentle smile.
For Yuri, it will always be his treasure in the whole, wide world. He really won’t trade it for anything… even for his happiness. Because just one smile from that beautiful face and just the sound of laughter resonating around those velvet lips and sparkling eyes. It brings Yuri heaven. It brings his heart a kind of fulfillment that no one can express.
He feels grateful for being able to love a person as such. That even if it hurts. That even if his heart breaks into pieces, he won’t ever regret being able to give something precious, such as his very heart to a person such as Yamada Ryosuke- his one and only true love.
Smiling sweetly, Yuri just nodded his head and continued on watching Yuto and Ryosuke play in their own world. The two are really like a couple. They match together, such a perfect site. And that stabbed Yuri’s heart tenfold but he really can’t say it out loud. He can’t be selfish, not this time. Not when Ryosuke’s happiness is involved.
He has no right.
But even so...he can still feel lonely and left behind, right?
Ryosuke is still his best friend after all. And also, since Risou no Musuko and Saikou no Jinsei no Owarikata ~Ending Planner~ have started airing; both he and Ryosuke never got the chance to be together- well, not like before. But Yuri, he really can understand that and he is not Ryosuke’s boyfriend to begin with so why would he be affected of such things?
He is only a secret admirer after all- a silent stalker.
"...a dreamer..." he added before sighing. He really doesn't have a chance at Ryosuke's heart. His only way of happiness is during their fan-service moments. Ryosuke always act so sweet to him during those times. Yuri can feel the love. However... "But I guess, 'YamaChii' won't be that visible this year ne... 'YamaJima' is way cuter than 'YamaChii' after all." The little squirrel whispered dejectedly as he tried his best to hide the tears. But unconsciously to him, a lone tear escaped his eyes.
It was a droplet of tear from his weeping heart.
The little squirrel shrugged his shoulders and smiled. He doesn't really need the negative thoughts right now. All he needs is a smile. He doesn't want to ruin any more happy moments with his selfish actions - not again. However, when Chii saw those slender fingers of Yuto wrap itself securely around Ryosuke's slender hips. Yuri just couldn't breathe. He felt suffocated that's why to avoid the pain crawling inside. He wavered his eyes away from the 'YamaJima' moment and just looked up at the sky.
Although when he saw the clouds, he frowned. It was darkening. And when the cloud darkens, Yuri hates it most, because it only means one thing; a storm is coming. It will yet again take all his sanity away, because when a storm comes, only one thing flashes into Yuri’s mind. It is the sound of thunder clapping into his ears- killing him and eating his soul alive.
“…it’s going to rain…” the little squirrel murmured before he took his eyes away from the sky and just continued on to stare at his two best friends laughing their heart out. “…such a beautiful site, ne?” a very low and gentle voice whispered at the back and that made Yuri turn and nod his head at the smiling Keito.
Keito let out a chuckle before he ruffled Yuri’s hair, “…but it hurts here, right?” the English gentleman of JUMP pointed at his heart before tears escaped those gentle eyes of his. And that hurt Yuri, very much, but still one of them has to be strong. One of them has to or else they can’t move on, “I know.” Yuri chuckled before he faced Keito and spread his arms wide, “…but for their happiness, we should learn how to accept and give up, right? So…” Yuri tried to choke back a sob by biting his lower lip, “…even if it hurts here in the heart. We should show them how much we support their choice, right? Their happiness is the greatest gift that we could give them. That’s the only thing that we can do… that’s the only-“Yuri couldn’t finish his sentence, because before he could even utter another word; his tears as well. It started to flow down on his cherry-tainted cheeks.
“…Wakkateru yo… Wakkateru…” Keito whispered softly before he encapsulated the crying Chinen into his arms. He knows. He understands that everything hurts. But crying, it is his ventilation from the pain so it’s normal for him to cry. He is always like that. But for the little guy in his arms, for Chinen, crying is not something he will do out of the spurt of the moment. Crying is not his usual ventilation, and that’s what worries Keito most. Because he knows, that once when a person who doesn’t usually cry and just always act strong, shed tears; it only means one thing.
The person has been strong enough for too long, and now that they're at their brink.
They need arms that would stable them and keep them strong.
“…just cry it all out Chii. Everything will turn out okay. We’ll find happiness…someday. I promise” Keito smiled understandingly as he continued on to hold and rub the small of Chinen’s back as he let the small boy cry into his arms.
For the two of them, loving someone is hard.
But giving the one they love the happiness...
...is far more than what they could ever wish for.
Because for the two of them..
…
Selfless love is the greatest act of sacrifice.
Fin.
Ai no Messeji: …and I won’t leave it like this, but I can really. I like this one as is. But I don’t ship YamaJima much. I only ship and is very bias to YamaChii and OkaJima, so I can’t just leave my Yuri and Keito in such a state of grief. They are too selfless. So don’t be angry with me, wait for the companion story: The Honest Heart. Also, I’ll be posting a few more. Well, only if I finish my school works early. Thanks everyone for reading!