Gender Fluidity

[ahunter3]

I don't identify as genderfluid myself. It's one more in a long list of terms that technically might apply, depending on how they're interpreted, but which would be misleading because of how they're more generally used

Comments

Gender as Costume or Straightjacket

[anonymous]

Interesting. When I was younger (early 20s) I experimented with my gender presentation in a way that could be described as genderfluid. I saw gender as a costume, something I could try on and change at will. Like you said, I think I was looking for a good fit.

My whole way of thinking about gender has changed now that I am older. I’m not an expert on gender theory, but based on my reading it seems like there are (very generally speaking) two feminist schools of thought on gender. One is the gender-as-self-expression theory, held by what you might call liberal feminists. The other is the theory, held by radical feminists, that gender is an institution for keeping women oppressed. This theory would say that gender is something imposed on us, and we would be better off doing away with the concept of gender. I don’t know if I am paraphrasing these theories well or if you would agree with my categorization.

Anyway, now that I am a little older, the radical feminist theory of gender resonates more with my experience. When I think about gender now, it’s not about how I dress or how short my hair is or what mannerisms I affect. It’s about what is expected of me, and I don’t seem to have much control over it. Regardless of what I wear, I am still expected to work all day at childcare and household duties, and then keep working all evening while the men in the household are resting or pursuing their own interests. I am still expected to subordinate my career ambitions and sexual desires to my husband’s. I can’t seem to get out of this gendered pattern even though I am aware of it. The costume has become a straightjacket.

It’s like at some point my gender solidified, not because I finally found the right “fit” and wanted to stick with it, but because the relationships and commitments I formed sort of locked me into it.

-Undercover Radfem