the right answer?...

[ahothoneyb]

i said yes,
but should i have?
should i have said NO?
it's like, i'm just saying whatever,
like, i want to be mean and
nasty and
rude but,
my mouth won't allow it.
so yes came out.
but is that my inside desire?
is that why i said yes?
cause i want this to work
when i decided that i don't give a rat's ass
about this anymore.
maybe i do...
maybe i don't...
maybe i don't...
sometimes,
i feel it
and i feel it really bad
and i'm hate it
cause i tell myself i don't want it.
and i don't
i don't.
but i said yes
yes
yes
yes...
toyka said i should try
but i don't want to
i'm tired of trying
i'm tired of being first
and i won't be
i am going to be stubborn
....
but i said yes...