I wonder...
This is personal and I normally wouldn't put this out there for everyone to read. But I needed to get it out because for some reason it's really bugging me. On Friday I went to Hooters with AJ because we both wanted Heffe. Unfortunately we got out of control and ended up drinking 3 1/2 pitchers. Not to mention I had already drank about a 6-pack before that with a couple other friends about an hour before. So needless to say we got beyond drunk and I had to call "Big Pun" (as our other friend calls him) to come and pick us up. At that point my memory is sketchy. AJ was climbing over the back seat to make out while Pun was driving and she kept saying, "someone is going to get laid tonight (yes she meant me.)"
So that's the personal part. The problem is I don't remember much of what happened and that's an understatement. I literally can only mention 3 or 4 things from the night, and it's only like a flash. All I remember is drinking at Hooters, walking to Pun's car (don't remember the walk through the casino) part of the drive home which I described above, knowing I "slept" with her and waking up in the morning with her next to me. I won't get into details but I can't stop being upset, if that's what you want to call it, for not remembering. It's been bugging me and I don't get it. It's like I really want to know what happened beyond the limited images and moments jumping around in my mind. I mean, I don't even remember being dropped off at home, unlocking the door, and walking to my room. I don't hang out with her often so maybe I'm upset because we finally did go out and I don't remember much? Shit, I can't ask her because she doesn't remember either, that's how bad we were. I guess at this point that's all we can do - GUESS.
Maybe I feel it was somewhat of a wasted time with her considering we're quite close but don't spend much time together aside from work? Or maybe I like her more than I think which is why this bothers me more than usual? Regardless, who knows when we'll go out again and who knows what it's going to be like next time we do go out. Yea it's weird I know. Normally you chalk this up to another drunk night, and I've had my fair share since moving to Vegas. But I can't help but wonder how we got so out of control. I'm normally not that bad and I've had drunk times in San Diego and out here, yet this time bugs me more. Who knows, maybe one day it'll come back to me or maybe it won't. Either way I now know to have more control over my drinking when I go out in public. And at least neither of us drove like we were talking about doing. I'm sure we'll have a talk about it considering we work close to each other and maybe she could shed some light. Or if we put the pieces to the puzzle in our minds together, we can create a half-assed attempt at an explanation to what exactly happened from the time we paid our bill to waking up.
I guess I should go to sleep considering I have to be at work at 7 am. Good night and if I have a "vision" I'll come back and delete this entry. Or laugh at myself later for being an idiot.
So that's the personal part. The problem is I don't remember much of what happened and that's an understatement. I literally can only mention 3 or 4 things from the night, and it's only like a flash. All I remember is drinking at Hooters, walking to Pun's car (don't remember the walk through the casino) part of the drive home which I described above, knowing I "slept" with her and waking up in the morning with her next to me. I won't get into details but I can't stop being upset, if that's what you want to call it, for not remembering. It's been bugging me and I don't get it. It's like I really want to know what happened beyond the limited images and moments jumping around in my mind. I mean, I don't even remember being dropped off at home, unlocking the door, and walking to my room. I don't hang out with her often so maybe I'm upset because we finally did go out and I don't remember much? Shit, I can't ask her because she doesn't remember either, that's how bad we were. I guess at this point that's all we can do - GUESS.
Maybe I feel it was somewhat of a wasted time with her considering we're quite close but don't spend much time together aside from work? Or maybe I like her more than I think which is why this bothers me more than usual? Regardless, who knows when we'll go out again and who knows what it's going to be like next time we do go out. Yea it's weird I know. Normally you chalk this up to another drunk night, and I've had my fair share since moving to Vegas. But I can't help but wonder how we got so out of control. I'm normally not that bad and I've had drunk times in San Diego and out here, yet this time bugs me more. Who knows, maybe one day it'll come back to me or maybe it won't. Either way I now know to have more control over my drinking when I go out in public. And at least neither of us drove like we were talking about doing. I'm sure we'll have a talk about it considering we work close to each other and maybe she could shed some light. Or if we put the pieces to the puzzle in our minds together, we can create a half-assed attempt at an explanation to what exactly happened from the time we paid our bill to waking up.
I guess I should go to sleep considering I have to be at work at 7 am. Good night and if I have a "vision" I'll come back and delete this entry. Or laugh at myself later for being an idiot.