Supernatural RPS fic: Light My Fire (Jensen/Jared) 3/3 - COMPLETE
Title: Light My Fire
Author: agt_spooky
Pairing: Jensen/Jared
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 6,691 (this part) / 19,700 (total for three parts)
Genre: Firefighter AU, Angst, First-time
Warnings/Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: It’s RPS, people. It never happened, but I wish it would. :-)
Author’s Notes: Many thanks, as always, to my fabulous beta, charityflint, who always makes my stories better. :-)
Summary: In New York, two men meet under unusual circumstances, and find themselves falling for each other. But when Jensen Ackles learns who Jared Padalecki really is, it all comes crashing down. Can Jared convince Jensen to open up his heart and take a chance on love again, despite who Jared is?
(banner created by agt_spooky)
Author's Notes 2: This story was born out of my love for the shows Emergency! and Third Watch and any references to them are entirely intentional. :-)
Author's Notes 3: I am incredibly nervous about posting this final chapter. The response to Chapters 1 and 2 has been overwhelming to me, and a part of me is afraid the ending here won't live up to everyone's expectations, even though I'm very happy with it. So it's with a shaky breath I give you...
Previous Chapters: PART 1 / PART 2
FROM PART 2:
The only sound in the apartment was the rain hitting the window as the two men regarded each other silently, hurt and pain radiating off of one, sympathy and compassion from the other, until Jared turned and wordlessly left Jensen alone in his apartment, holding Ryan’s photo to his chest.
PART 3
The morning of his next shift, Jensen cornered Tom in the locker room as his friend was putting on his uniform. Ignoring Kyle, who was at his own locker, Jensen walked straight up to Tom and jabbed a finger into his chest.
“You sent him over to my apartment? I should kick your ass,” Jensen snapped, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Kyle turn his head sharply, then wisely leave the room.
“Jen, I - “ Tom started, trying to explain.
“ - but I won’t,” Jensen finished.
“You…won’t?”
Jensen sat down heavily on the bench next to his friend. “No. I was handling this whole situation badly. It was time Jared knew.”
“So you guys talked?” Tom asked hopefully.
“Not really. He asked who Ryan was. I told him and then about what happened last year…and then I asked him to go.”
Tom sighed. “I was hoping he might be able to convince you to put the past behind you and give this thing a shot between the two of you.”
“I know you were,” Jensen answered, standing. “But it’s just not gonna happen, Tom.”
~~~~~
The station alarm sounded at 5:12 am the next morning, jolting the crew from their sleep. As Jensen threw back the blankets on his bed the dispatcher’s voice came over the loudspeaker - four alarm structure fire at a factory across town, in Station 51’s jurisdiction. This was the biggest run they’d had in a week and Jensen could already feel the adrenaline start to pump through his body as he jammed his feet into his boots and pulled up his turnout pants, slipping the suspenders over his shoulders.
Jared was getting ready, too, standing at the side of his bunk, across from Jensen’s. This was the closest proximity they’d been to one another since the start of shift yesterday morning. Jared had been keeping his distance from Jensen, though Jensen could tell it was hard for the young man to do so, and he tried to convince himself that he was grateful to Jared for respecting his wishes.
Jensen turned to make his way to the fire pole, but Jared caught his elbow.
“Hey. Be careful.” Jared said earnestly, then moved past Jensen to the pole before Jensen could even respond.
~~~~~
The fire lit up the early morning sky, shooting flames and smoke into the air as Station 127 approached the chaos, sirens blaring. Four full companies of firemen were pouring out of their vehicles, laying hose as the Fire Chief shouted instructions to each station captain over the walkie-talkie.
The factory night shift employees were streaming out of the burning building, covered in soot, coughing, rubbing at their eyes. Jensen watched as Jared and Alix immediately sprinted over to help them, along with the other paramedics at the scene.
“Welling! Ackles!” Jeff shouted. “Two inch and a halfs - north side! Go!”
“Right, Cap!” they chorused as they strapped on their air tanks and slipped their masks over their faces, seating their helmets tight on their heads. Then they were grabbing the requested hose off the rear of the engine as Kyle worked quickly to get the water flowing. They could see Daniel, Toby and Shawn getting the ladder truck in place, raising the snorkel to the level of the second floor of the factory.
Yards of hose trailing behind them, Jensen and Tom ran toward the north side of the building and in through the door next to the loading docks. The wall of heat slammed into them first, brilliant red-orange flames so bright they had to squint, devouring everything in its path.
Tom and Jensen turned their hoses on as flaming debris showered down around them, pallets of material bursting into flames, toppling over. Tom stood on Jensen’s right, four or five steps ahead of him, spraying gallons upon gallons of water on the fire, trying desperately to beat it back, get it under control.
Jensen was sweating in his heavy turnout gear, breathing harshly inside his air mask, eyes sweeping everywhere at once, making sure the fire wasn’t wrapping around behind them when he heard it - an ominous groaning noise from directly above him and Tom.
Looking up, Jensen felt his heart slam against his chest - the support beams were on fire. And as he looked he saw the one above them snap. There could be only moments before it crashed down upon them.
“TOM!” Jensen screamed, even though he knew it was practically useless, his voice not carrying from behind his mask and over the sound of the fire to the other man.
He tried to reach Tom, tried to take those five steps to push his friend out of danger, but he only managed to take two before the beam broke away, falling from the ceiling and slamming into them both.
Jensen cried out as the heavy wood struck him on his right shoulder, driving him to the concrete floor but not pinning him. He landed chest down on his hose, driving the breath from him for a moment before he was rolling away from the flaming beam.
“TOM!” Jensen screamed again, still on the floor, eyes searching wildly for his friend as the fire surged up around them.
What he saw terrified him - Tom, unmoving, lying face down, pinned fully underneath the beam that was still on fire.
“Tom!” Jensen’s gloved hand immediately came up to slap his personal alarm that was clipped to the strap of his air tank, activating the device, sending a signal out to Kyle at the engine, letting him know that Jensen was in trouble.
Then, shoulder screaming in protest, Jensen lifted up his hose and turned it on the beam, and Tom, praying that Tom’s turnout gear was still protecting him from the flames.
The last of the fire had just gone out from the beam when movement from his right caught Jensen’s attention. It was Toby and four guys from Station 51, running full tilt into the building. Jensen snapped off his hose as they approached, dropping it to the floor, struggling to get to his knees, his left hand clutching his right arm and shoulder.
“Tom’s pinned!” Jensen yelled as Toby reached his side, helping him stand.
Three of the guys from 51 immediately started lifting the heavy wood from Tom while the other picked up Jensen’s discarded hose, turning it on, pushing the flames back.
Toby got Jensen to his feet then rushed over to pull Tom out once the beam was lifted up high enough.
“We need a backboard!” Jensen yelled to Toby, dropping back down to the floor to check on Tom’s condition.
“I’m on it!” Toby shouted back, sprinting back out of the building.
Another of Station 51’s men was able to get Tom’s hose under control, which was still turned on, whipping around wildly on the floor, and turned it on the flames. A pallet of material exploded to their left and Jensen instinctively covered Tom’s prone body with his own, protecting his injured friend as burning debris rained down.
Just over a minute later Toby returned with the backboard, and as Jensen watched, Tom was transferred to it, face down, because of the air tank on his back.
Throughout the process Tom remained unmoving, eyes closed, breathing shallowly and Jensen desperately wanted his friend out of this fiery hell hole as quick as possible.
“Okay, let’s move!” Toby yelled once Tom was secured to the backboard, and he and two of 51’s men lifted the board and started moving out of the building, Jensen trailing behind, his right arm held tight against his body.
As they got closer to the door, Jensen could see Jared and Alix waiting just outside with a stretcher, their expressions tight and concerned.
The minute Jensen cleared the doorway he was throwing off his helmet, pulling off his air mask as Tom was loaded onto the gurney.
“Beam came down on both of us!” Jensen called to Jared and Alix as the two of them started quickly rolling the stretcher toward the ambulance. “Tom was pinned! He hasn’t moved or opened his eyes!”
Jared nodded. “Let’s get this gear off of him!” he ordered as they came to a stop in front of the bus, and Tom’s helmet, air mask and tank were carefully removed by Toby.
“Let’s roll him,” Alix said. “I’ve got his neck.”
Jared and Alix carefully rolled Tom from his side onto his back and the paramedics went into action, Toby and Jensen standing by helplessly. Alix started putting a C-Collar on Tom as Jared unbuckled Tom’s turnout coat and immediately put his stethoscope to Tom’s chest.
“Pupils are equal and reactive,” Alix called out, moving then to check Tom’s leg, which was lying at a strange angle. “Compound fracture of the left femur!”
Jared shook his head. “I’ve got decreased breath sounds on the right.”
“Dammit,” Jensen swore, knowing that was a sure sign of a broken rib that had punctured a lung.
Alix immediately fastened a blood pressure cuff on Tom’s arm. “BP’s falling!”
“Shit! Tension pneumo - he’s gonna go into respiratory failure if we don’t decompress.”
“Get him on the bus, right now,” Alix ordered, opening the ambulance doors, and Toby helped Jared get the stretcher inside, Jared remaining next to Tom.
“Get an IV going!” Alix told Jared as she closed the doors. “Jen? What’s wrong with your arm?”
“What?” Jensen tore his eyes away from the ambulance. “Nothing. Don’t worry about me. Take care of Tom.”
“Cut the crap and get in the bus. I don’t have time to argue with you,” Alix said sharply, moving toward the driver’s door.
“Go,” Toby told Jensen. “I’ll tell Cap what’s going on.”
Jensen nodded and climbed into the passenger seat of the ambulance for the longest six minute ride he could ever remember. He could hear Jared on the radio to Angel of Mercy hospital, calling in Tom’s condition, which was deteriorating. They needed to get a chest tube in him immediately.
Alix pulled into the ER bay at the hospital with a rush of lights and sirens where one of the ER doctors and a nurse were waiting. Jared and the doctor got the stretcher out of the ambulance and disappeared quickly inside the hospital and down a hallway.
“Hey,” Alix said gently, placing a hand on Jensen’s left arm. “Let’s get you looked at, okay?”
But Jensen remained rooted to the spot, staring down the hallway where Tom had been taken.
“He’s in good hands, Jen.”
Jensen turned his head at his own words echoing back at him and Alix gave him a small smile.
“I need to call Jamie,” Jensen said slowly.
Alix nodded. “Okay, let’s do that first,” she answered and Jensen let himself be led toward the nurse’s station, to a phone call he dreaded having to make.
~~~~~
A short while later Jensen emerged from the exam room, his turnout coat over his left arm, his right arm in a sling. Nothing broken, the doctor had told him, just a wrenched shoulder and some deep muscle bruising. He’d be out of commission for a couple of days while everything healed.
As he stepped out Alix was walking past and she stopped when she saw him.
“How’s Tom?” Jensen asked without preamble.
Alix sighed. “He’s in surgery. His lung’s pretty bad and his spleen may have been nicked by one of the broken ribs as well. He’s got some internal bleeding. They’re setting his leg, too. It’ll be awhile before we know anything.”
Jensen ran a hand over his face. “Dammit.”
“I’m on my way to get coffee. Want some?”
“No. Thanks, Alix.”
“Okay. I’ll be back in a bit. Jamie’s here,” she told him, before moving away.
Jensen turned his head and spotted Tom’s wife, Jamie, sitting by herself in a chair down the hallway, just past the nurse’s station, where Jared was filling out his paperwork on the run. As Jensen got closer he could see that Jamie was crying softly, wiping at her eyes.
He stopped walking when he got next to Jared, swallowing deeply as he looked at Jamie. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jared turn to him, then to also look at Jamie, looking small and scared in the hard plastic chair, waiting anxiously for word on her husband. The two men regarded her silently for a moment before Jensen turned to Jared.
“Now do you understand?” Jensen asked, voice rough, imploring.
He went to Jamie then, going down on his knees next to her chair and she wrapped her arms around Jensen’s neck, burying her face in his shoulder. He held her tight, as she had done for him a year ago, turning his head to look at Jared, his gaze steady and unwavering until Jared had to look away.
~~~~~
Three hours later Jensen lowered himself down onto his sofa, emotionally and physically exhausted. He’d taken a shower as soon as he’d gotten home from the hospital, washing off the soot and grime from the fire, the hot water helping to ease the ache in his arm and shoulder.
He closed his eyes and blew out a long breath, willing himself to relax from the stress of the early morning hours. He’d stayed with Jamie until both her parents and Tom’s had arrived, and word had come down about his friend’s condition.
Thankfully, Tom’s surgery went well. They’d stopped the internal bleeding and luckily his spleen had not been damaged after all. The chest tube that had been inserted was working to help repair Tom’s lung and his broken leg had been set and casted. Tom would be in the hospital for awhile and have quite a recovery period ahead of him, but be would recover, and that was the most important thing.
A soft knock on his door roused Jensen from the doze he’d slipped into, and he pushed himself up wearily from the couch with the arm not in the sling and went to answer it. And immediately wished he hadn’t when he saw Jared standing in the hallway as he opened the door.
For an instant Jensen thought about shutting the door, too exhausted to deal with the younger man right now, but one look at Jared, who looked as tired as he was, made him step back and let Jared inside.
Jensen remained silent as they walked into his living room, waiting for Jared to tell him why he was there.
“I need to know something,” Jared said quietly.
“What is it?”
Jared took a breath. “If you can look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel anything for me I’ll turn around and leave right now and I’ll never bother you again.”
Jensen shook his head, angry, exasperated. “Did you not understand the point I was trying to make at the hospital? That was me, sitting in a chair like that last year, but my outcome was the complete opposite of Jamie’s. She gets to take Tom home in a few weeks. I got to go to a funeral instead.” Jensen paused, drawing in a shaky breath. “They say it’s hardest on those left behind. And it’s true. I know that first hand now and I never want to go through it again. But more than that…” Jensen’s voice softened. “I never want you to go through it.”
Jared took a step toward Jensen, less than an arm’s length away now. “Jensen, please…stop pushing me away, telling yourself it’s what’s best for me. I know what’s best for me and it’s standing right in front of me.”
Jared’s next words were soft and slow. “I’m falling in love with you.”
Jensen shook his head sharply, trying to take a step back, but Jared caught his left arm. “Jared, don’t. I can’t - I can’t do this…”
“Yes, you can. I know you’re scared. I know our lives are dangerous, but I can’t change that. It’s what we do. It’s who we are.”
Jared rubbed his thumb gently against the skin of Jensen’s arm. “I can’t even imagine what it would be like to lose someone I loved as much as you loved Ryan. But have you ever stopped to think that either of us could be killed simply crossing the street? You can’t let your fear hold you back from happiness. Life’s about risks and taking chances. Otherwise it’s not worth living. So take a chance, Jensen. Take a chance on us…”
Then Jared was closing the distance, tilting his head down, pressing his lips softly, hesitantly, against Jensen’s.
At that first touch, that first taste of Jared, the younger man’s words echoing in his head, Jensen gave up the battle, tired of fighting what he knew in his heart was right. He didn’t try and stop the soft sound of surrender he made as he closed his eyes, parting his lips under Jared’s, his body swaying toward the taller man.
One of Jared’s arms came around his waist, strong and sure, while his other hand rose up to cradle the back of Jensen’s head. And as Jared slipped his tongue inside Jensen’s mouth, releasing a quiet moan, Jensen was never gladder that he had denied Jared the kiss he’d wanted the night they first met. That was the wrong time, the wrong situation, and he’d been with Jared that night for the wrong reasons.
But now…now was the right time. When the kiss truly meant something important between them, a commitment, and it was all the more sweeter and beautiful because of it.
Jensen’s left hand went to the small of Jared’s back, slipping up underneath Jared’s t-shirt to press against his warm skin, as he tilted his head, deepening the kiss.
The kiss went on, slow and deep and so fucking perfect that Jensen just let himself drown in the sensations Jared was creating inside him. And with the soft noises Jared was making, he knew he was having the same effect on the other man as well.
The hand wrapped around Jensen’s waist eventually drifted down to cup his ass through the gray sweatpants he was wearing, pulling his body tighter against Jared’s, his right arm now trapped firmly between them in the sling. And when the younger man started a slow grind of his groin against Jensen’s, Jensen couldn’t help groaning into the kiss, pushing his tongue against Jared’s a bit harder.
They remained that way for long minutes, rocking against each other, feeling themselves harden as the kiss grew more intense, until Jensen could feel small tremors racing underneath Jared’s skin.
When Jared pulled back from the kiss Jensen whined in the back of his throat. “Don’t - don’t stop...” he panted, opening his eyes to see Jared’s glassy, desire-filled ones looking back at him, Jared’s lips puffy and shiny.
“You taste so good,” Jared moaned. “Don’t wanna stop…but I’m shakin’ so bad I’m gonna fall down.”
Jensen smiled and hooked the fingers of his left hand in the waistband of Jared’s jeans. “C’mon then,” he said, tugging Jared forward as he walked backwards the few steps to his couch. He dropped down onto the cushions and expected Jared to sit next to him, but instead Jared went to his knees in front of him, running his large hands up Jensen’s legs, spreading them apart, moving between them.
“Jen…” he breathed, leaning in to capture Jensen’s mouth once more, and Jensen’s expression went soft at Jared’s first time use of his nickname and how perfect it sounded falling from the younger man’s lips.
Jensen let his eyes fall closed again, kissing Jared deeply, fingers tangled in Jared’s long hair as Jared’s hands slid further up his legs until his thumbs were rubbing the hard ridge of Jensen’s cock.
“Wanna taste more of you,” Jared murmured into the kiss, nipping at Jensen’s bottom lip.
“God…yeah…” Jensen lifted his hips up slightly and Jared tugged down his boxers and sweatpants, slipping them off Jensen’s feet, tossing them somewhere behind him.
Again Jared ran his hands up Jensen’s legs, bare this time, licking and kissing his way up Jensen’s left thigh.
“Mmm….yeah,” Jensen encouraged him, his fingers threading through Jared’s soft hair.
And then Jared was cupping Jensen’s heavy balls, licking a wet stripe up the underside of Jensen’s hard cock at the same time and Jensen dropped his head back against the couch at the dual sensations.
Then he was groaning deep in his throat, picking his head back up as Jared’s hot, wet mouth slid down over his cock, sucking at the head, lapping at the moisture leaking from the tip.
Jared sank lower then, taking in Jensen’s hard length until Jensen felt the head of his cock bump the back of Jared’s throat. Jared swallowed then, pulling another moan from Jensen before bobbing his head up and down smoothly and quickly, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked Jensen off.
“Feels so fucking good…” Jensen panted as Jared set about pulling his orgasm out of him in record time.
Jared’s hand began fondling Jensen’s balls again and Jensen spread his legs wider, tilting his hips up.
“Just - just a little more,” Jensen breathed, biting his lip as he felt his climax start deep inside. “God, almost there…”
He couldn’t stop his hips pumping upward, and Jared let him, once, twice, and then Jared was humming around his cock as it slid in and out of his mouth, the vibrations the last push Jensen needed.
He came with a sharp cry of Jared’s name, eyes squeezing shut as his cock pulsed down Jared’s throat, over and over, feeling Jared swallow everything he had to give until he was spent, sagging back against the couch, breathing harshly.
Jensen felt his cock slip from between Jared’s lips then the younger man was rising up, licking at Jensen’s bottom lip.
“You taste fucking amazing…you sound fucking amazing when you come. I - “ Jared’s breath stuttered and Jensen realized he was stroking himself through his jeans.
“Jared, wait, wait,” Jensen breathed, tugging at Jared’s arm, nipping back at Jared’s lips. “Wanna taste you, too…”
Jared groaned, his eyes dark with arousal, plundering Jensen’s mouth hard and fast before pulling back, hands fumbling with his zipper. Jensen leaned in to help, suddenly irritated at having his right arm incapacitated and impatiently pulled at the strap of his sling, getting it over his head and tossing the material away.
Jared opened his mouth to protest, but what came out was a moan instead as Jensen got his hand inside Jared’s jeans and stroked him firmly through his boxers.
“C’mon, Jare, get ‘em off…let me touch you…”
Jeans, boxers, shoes, socks and even the t-shirt were quickly discarded and then Jared was standing gloriously naked in front of Jensen, his stiff cock standing out from his body, the head red and wet with precome.
Jensen wasted no time, sliding to the edge of the couch where he wrapped his left hand around Jared’s cock, and slipped his mouth down over the head.
Jared’s taste exploded across his tongue - salty, bitter and musky - and he tongued at the slit, drawing more of the clear fluid out to swallow down. He heard Jared suck in a breath and one of his large hands settled on Jensen’s head, fingers sliding through the short strands of his hair, while the other gripped his left shoulder.
Jensen opened his mouth wider and took in as much of Jared’s cock as he could, a heavy weight against his tongue, steel wrapped in silk. He started sucking, his hand stroking at the same time as he bobbed his head, bringing Jared ever closer to his orgasm.
“Oh god, Jen…not gonna last,” Jared warned him with a groan. “So close already…god, your mouth…don’t stop, don’t stop,” he rambled.
And Jensen didn’t, pressing his tongue firmly against the bundle of nerves on the underside of Jared’s cock and the younger man jerked at the sensation, a burst of precome Jensen’s only warning before Jared was coming.
“Jen!” Jared cried out, fingers tightening in Jensen’s hair as he climaxed, hips stuttering.
Jensen swallowed down Jared’s release, hot bursts that coated his tongue and throat, Jared’s taste intoxicating.
He released Jared’s cock as the younger man’s orgasm subsided and Jared sagged forward, collapsing onto the couch next to Jensen, flushed and smiling gently.
Jensen smiled as well, then leaned in to kiss Jared, long and slow, bringing them both back down until they drew apart, resting their foreheads together.
“I’m falling in love with you, too,” Jensen whispered.
~~~~~
Later, tangled naked together underneath the sheets of Jensen’s bed, the late morning sun peeking in through the blinds, Jensen spoke the words that had been lying heavily on his mind, a confession he felt he needed to make.
“I need to apologize,” he began, and Jared shifted, raising himself up to look at Jensen, confusion on his face.
“For what?”
“The night we met, at the bar…it was the one year anniversary of Ryan’s death.”
Jared’s eyes went soft and he ran his fingers through Jensen’s short hair. “Ah, Jen…”
“I was so lonely and you were there and you were interested…” Jensen said, the words tumbling out of him.
“Shhh…Jen…” Jared tried to quiet him, but Jensen needed to get this out.
“I missed Ryan so damn much and I wanted to use you as a substitute, to pretend…” He swallowed, reaching to rub his thumb across Jared’s cheekbone. “It was wrong. I never should’ve…used you like that, and I’m sorry.”
Jared shook his head slowly, a soft smile on his face as he turned and kissed Jensen’s palm. “It’s okay, Jen. You don’t have to apologize. I understand why you did it, and if the situation had been reversed I may have done the same thing. I don’t care what the circumstances were that brought us together. Just that they did. We’re here now…and that’s all that matters.”
And as Jared leaned in to capture his mouth for a long, sweet kiss, vanquishing his worry, Jensen had to agree.
~~~~~
THREE WEEKS LATER
The morning was clear and bright, not a cloud in the sky, the sun shining down on the crew of Station 127 as they brandished sponges and hoses and towels - washing and polishing the engine and the ambulance until the red metal gleamed.
Jensen, Kyle, Shawn and Daniel were washing the engine while Toby helped out Alix and Jared with the bus, easy laughter and taunts flowing between everyone, as the truck guys had handed the engine guys their asses during the basketball game a short while earlier. And why? Because the truck guys had drafted 6’ 4” Jared Padalecki to their team. Jensen would’ve protested the advantage but it gave him an opportunity to manhandle his lover as he guarded him during the game, so he wasn’t complaining.
In fact, he wasn’t complaining about life in general these days. Tom’s recovery was going better than his doctor had hoped, and he should be back at work in another four weeks. Jensen had been by the house several times in the last three weeks to see his friend and to tell him that he and Jared were together now. To say that Tom was happy at the news was an understatement.
Things were great between Jared and him, too. As with any new relationship, they couldn’t get enough of one another, spending their days off together, whenever Jensen wasn’t in class.
They started dating, as backward as that may have been, considering how their relationship started, but it was working for them and that’s all that mattered. They went out to dinner, caught a Yankees game when the Rangers were in town, went to the movies and had a picnic in Central Park. They were even planning on taking vacation time together next month to visit San Antonio. But most of all they talked. Some nights they didn’t even leave the apartment, Jensen’s head in Jared’s lap on the couch - just talking, getting to really know one another. And being woken up to soft, lazy kisses, then making love to Jared, felt more amazing each and every time.
He hadn’t laughed or smiled so often in a long time, and he was thankful every day that Jared had pushed past his defenses and hadn’t given up on him. He would always care for Ryan and he’d never forget him, and Jared understood that, and Jensen hoped that Ryan was smiling down on him and his newfound happiness.
A wet sponge smacking into Jensen's back pulled him from his thoughts and he whirled around to see Jared laughing, a smile on his face, his dimples flashing.
“Oh, you think that’s funny, do you?” Jensen called over, swinging around the reel line he’d been using on the engine’s tires, intending to soak the young medic, but at the last second Jared dodged, pulling an unsuspecting Alix in front of him and she caught the full force of the spray instead.
Sputtering indignantly as the rest of the guys laughed, Alix wasted no time in throwing her own sponge at Jared, catching him on the side of his head. This time it was Jensen’s turn to laugh as the soap suds slid down Jared’s face.
Before an all out water war could get started, the station alarm sounded and it was instantly all business with the crew. The sponges, buckets and towels were quickly stowed away inside the apparatus room as they all made their way to the equipment room to pull on their gear. They were joined by Jeff and Haley Bullock, who had transferred over from second shift to take Tom’s place while he was recovering.
The dispatcher’s voice came over the loudspeaker - two alarm structure fire at a manufacturing facility in Station 99’s jurisdiction - they were requesting assistance.
They rolled up onto the scene and quickly assessed the situation, with Jeff on the walkie-talkie to 99’s captain. Thick, black, acrid smoke was streaming out of the front of the two-story building where 99’s men were pouring water in, though the flames were difficult to see.
Kyle immediately went to work hooking up the hydrant to the engine as Jeff called out orders to everyone else.
“Bullock! Grab an inch and a half and assist 99 on the west side!”
“Right, Cap!” Haley answered, quickly hooking the hose line over her shoulder and moving toward the building.
“Sanders! Larson! Get that ladder up to the roof!”
“On it, Cap!” Shawn called back and he and Toby started getting the ladder into position.
“Ackles! Hoffmann! Grab the chainsaw and the K-12 and get on the roof, we need to ventilate. 99 can’t see what they’re doing. Watch yourselves up there.”
“Got it, Cap!” Jensen replied, and he and Daniel pulled on their air masks then retrieved both saws from the compartment on the engine.
Moments later they were climbing up the ladder and onto the roof, treading carefully. They spaced themselves apart, then fired up the saws and went to work cutting holes to allow the smoke to escape. Then Station 99 could advance into the building with their hoses and clearer visibility.
Minutes later both Jensen and Daniel had their first holes cut open and the thick smoke started pouring out as they moved to cut another two holes further in on the roof.
It happened without warning.
One second Jensen was using the chainsaw and the next the roof under him gave way and he plummeted down into the building.
For a brief second Jensen couldn’t comprehend that he was falling until his body slammed into the razor sharp edge of a large piece of machinery. He cried out as he felt the metal pierce through his turnout pants, slicing open his skin, and agonizing pain shot through his right leg.
He bounced off the machinery, which slowed his fall but didn’t stop it, next impacting a large stack of wooden pallets, the top two of which crushed under the combined weight of Jensen and his heavy air tank. The stack of pallets toppled over, bringing Jensen with it, tossing him the remainder of the way to the cement floor.
Jensen hit hard, landing awkwardly on his air tank, driving the breath from his lungs as the pallets tumbled down upon him. He struggled to catch his breath, suddenly realizing he was no longer breathing in clean oxygen but the thick smoke instead. That could only mean that either his air hose had been pierced or he had lost the positive seal on his mask.
He struggled to move under the weight of the wooden pallets, but his limbs wouldn’t cooperate, his right leg hurting so bad it must be broken, though he could feel wetness coating his thigh. His vision started to swim with the lack of clean air to breathe and even with the heat of the fire around him he started to grow cold.
Above the cracking and snapping of the flames Jensen could vaguely make out voices shouting and he tried to call out, let them know where he was, but he couldn’t draw enough breath, feeling himself on the verge of unconsciousness.
Then the voices were there, right above him, and hands started pulling away pieces of the pallets and roof debris that were on top of him, uncovering him moments later, and he found himself looking up into the concerned faces of Shawn, Toby and Daniel from behind their air masks.
“Jensen!” Shawn yelled. “God, Jen, hang on. We’re gonna get you outta here.”
“Okay, let’s lift him!” Toby called and Jensen felt two pairs of hands hook under his shoulders and legs and raise him up quickly but carefully while another set of hands supported his neck.
He was on a backboard seconds later, lying on his side, being carried through the smoke and flames and out into the bright sunshine where he was placed on a stretcher.
Someone was yelling to get his gear off of him, his body feeling like a rag doll as his helmet, mask and tank were removed and he was rolled carefully onto his back. He struggled to draw a breath of the fresh air, his lungs burning from inhaling the hot, acrid smoke.
“Jensen!” Jared’s face swam into view above his, and he blinked heavily, starting to feel disconnected from his body that was growing steadily colder.
“Hang on, Jen,” Jared told him, slipping an oxygen mask over his face. “Breathe for me, c’mon…” he pleaded, snapping open Jensen’s turnout coat and placing his stethoscope to Jensen’s chest.
“Where the hell is all this blood coming from?” Alix called out, a tinge of panic in her voice. “Jared, help me get his boots and pants off!”
Jared moved out of Jensen’s field of vision and he felt his boots removed and his turnout pants tugged off.
“Shit! Jared!”
“Oh god dammit, it’s his femoral artery! Alix get the pressure dressing, now! He’s bleeding out!”
Jensen heard all of this as if from a great distance, his vision going dark around the edges, and he felt himself start to drift. He was so tired…
“Stay with me, Jen, stay with me!” Jared’s scared voice reached his ears.
Jensen tried to reach for Jared, to say his name, but his battered body wouldn’t obey him, giving in to the darkness instead…
“We’re losing him!”
“NO!”
~~~~~
Consciousness returned slowly and painfully to Jensen. Everything hurt - his head, his back, his chest, every muscle in his body - but mainly his right leg.
His eyes blinked open slowly, a bit at a time, and things gradually came into focus. After a moment of disorientation he realized he was lying on his back in a hospital bed, an IV in his left arm. He felt the oxygen cannula in his nose and took a slow, experimental deep breath, grateful to find he could do so again. Swallowing was still somewhat painful, though, his throat raw from inhaling the hot smoke for too long a period of time. He was covered with a blanket from his waist down, but he could feel that his right thigh was swathed in thick bandages.
Thankful that he was still in one piece, he allowed himself a small smile and turned his head to the side - to find an empty chair.
No Jared.
It took a moment to register that his lover wasn’t there, and when it did the smile slid from Jensen’s face. He’d just naturally assumed that Jared would be there, waiting for him to wake up, and it hit him like a punch to the gut that he wasn’t.
And his mind went instantly, immediately someplace it shouldn’t have. A knee-jerk emotional reaction - Jared had now experienced it for himself, to nearly lose someone to the job - and he couldn’t handle it. He was running like Jensen had. That bastard. He’d made Jensen take the chance, take the risk, for love. To open his heart again. Only for Jared to trample all over it. It was hard enough losing Ryan, but now Jared, too? How dare he?
Deep down he knew it was stupid and irrational to be thinking like this. There could be a million perfectly valid reasons why Jared wasn’t here, but at the moment the logical part of his brain was being soundly beaten down by the stronger emotional part.
Hot, angry tears threatened at his train of thought, but before one could fall, the door to his room opened and Jared was struggling to get through the opening with a teddy bear nearly as tall as he was. His eyes slid over to the bed and widened the moment he saw Jensen looking back.
“Jen!” A huge, relieved smile lit up Jared’s face and he dropped the stuffed animal, hurrying over to the side of the bed where he grasped Jensen’s hand. “God, you’re awake!”
Jensen blinked furiously. With his emotions swinging so swiftly from one end of the spectrum to the other in the matter of a few minutes, he was having trouble trying to process the fact that Jared was actually standing next to his bed.
“You - you’re here,” Jensen whispered hoarsely, his voice like sandpaper.
Jared cocked his head, regarding Jensen quizzically. “Well, yeah. Where else would I be?” he asked with a smile.
When Jensen remained silent he could almost see the light bulb go on over Jared’s head, that he knew what Jensen had assumed, and he sat down on the edge of the bed, running a hand through Jensen’s hair.
“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified that I was going to lose you right then and there,” Jared confessed softly. “Shit, Jen, you did die. You flatlined in the bus before we got here.” He placed his hand on Jensen’s chest. “I had to - to…” He paused, inhaling raggedly, and Jensen covered his hand with his own.
Jared swallowed then captured Jensen with his warm, hazel eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Jen. I love you and I’m not going anywhere.”
“Love you, too,” Jensen whispered. “I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions. When I opened my eyes and you weren’t there - “
Jared shook his head. “Don’t apologize. I know how that must’ve looked to you and I’m sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up.”
“I wouldn’t have woken up at all if it wasn’t for you. You saved my life.”
Jared tapped a finger on Jensen’s chest. “Don’t make me do it again, you hear me? No more high-wire acts without a net or at least without someone there to catch you.”
Jensen’s tone was light, but his eyes were serious. “What about you? You want the job? Will you catch me?”
Jared’s soft smile went straight to Jensen’s heart as the younger man leaned in for a kiss.
“Always, Jen. Always.”
THE END
Whew! Well, there you have it, folks! I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. And who knows, there may be further adventures of Fireman!Jensen and Paramedic!Jared in the future. :-)
Oh, and bonus points to anyone who knew that Station 127 was the real station at which the show Emergency! filmed - and that I was lucky enough to visit several years ago. It's still like walking onto a television film set! :-)
Read the sequel to Light My Fire - PLAYING WITH FIRE
Author: agt_spooky
Pairing: Jensen/Jared
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 6,691 (this part) / 19,700 (total for three parts)
Genre: Firefighter AU, Angst, First-time
Warnings/Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: It’s RPS, people. It never happened, but I wish it would. :-)
Author’s Notes: Many thanks, as always, to my fabulous beta, charityflint, who always makes my stories better. :-)
Summary: In New York, two men meet under unusual circumstances, and find themselves falling for each other. But when Jensen Ackles learns who Jared Padalecki really is, it all comes crashing down. Can Jared convince Jensen to open up his heart and take a chance on love again, despite who Jared is?
(banner created by agt_spooky)
Author's Notes 2: This story was born out of my love for the shows Emergency! and Third Watch and any references to them are entirely intentional. :-)
Author's Notes 3: I am incredibly nervous about posting this final chapter. The response to Chapters 1 and 2 has been overwhelming to me, and a part of me is afraid the ending here won't live up to everyone's expectations, even though I'm very happy with it. So it's with a shaky breath I give you...
Previous Chapters: PART 1 / PART 2
FROM PART 2:
The only sound in the apartment was the rain hitting the window as the two men regarded each other silently, hurt and pain radiating off of one, sympathy and compassion from the other, until Jared turned and wordlessly left Jensen alone in his apartment, holding Ryan’s photo to his chest.
PART 3
The morning of his next shift, Jensen cornered Tom in the locker room as his friend was putting on his uniform. Ignoring Kyle, who was at his own locker, Jensen walked straight up to Tom and jabbed a finger into his chest.
“You sent him over to my apartment? I should kick your ass,” Jensen snapped, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Kyle turn his head sharply, then wisely leave the room.
“Jen, I - “ Tom started, trying to explain.
“ - but I won’t,” Jensen finished.
“You…won’t?”
Jensen sat down heavily on the bench next to his friend. “No. I was handling this whole situation badly. It was time Jared knew.”
“So you guys talked?” Tom asked hopefully.
“Not really. He asked who Ryan was. I told him and then about what happened last year…and then I asked him to go.”
Tom sighed. “I was hoping he might be able to convince you to put the past behind you and give this thing a shot between the two of you.”
“I know you were,” Jensen answered, standing. “But it’s just not gonna happen, Tom.”
~~~~~
The station alarm sounded at 5:12 am the next morning, jolting the crew from their sleep. As Jensen threw back the blankets on his bed the dispatcher’s voice came over the loudspeaker - four alarm structure fire at a factory across town, in Station 51’s jurisdiction. This was the biggest run they’d had in a week and Jensen could already feel the adrenaline start to pump through his body as he jammed his feet into his boots and pulled up his turnout pants, slipping the suspenders over his shoulders.
Jared was getting ready, too, standing at the side of his bunk, across from Jensen’s. This was the closest proximity they’d been to one another since the start of shift yesterday morning. Jared had been keeping his distance from Jensen, though Jensen could tell it was hard for the young man to do so, and he tried to convince himself that he was grateful to Jared for respecting his wishes.
Jensen turned to make his way to the fire pole, but Jared caught his elbow.
“Hey. Be careful.” Jared said earnestly, then moved past Jensen to the pole before Jensen could even respond.
~~~~~
The fire lit up the early morning sky, shooting flames and smoke into the air as Station 127 approached the chaos, sirens blaring. Four full companies of firemen were pouring out of their vehicles, laying hose as the Fire Chief shouted instructions to each station captain over the walkie-talkie.
The factory night shift employees were streaming out of the burning building, covered in soot, coughing, rubbing at their eyes. Jensen watched as Jared and Alix immediately sprinted over to help them, along with the other paramedics at the scene.
“Welling! Ackles!” Jeff shouted. “Two inch and a halfs - north side! Go!”
“Right, Cap!” they chorused as they strapped on their air tanks and slipped their masks over their faces, seating their helmets tight on their heads. Then they were grabbing the requested hose off the rear of the engine as Kyle worked quickly to get the water flowing. They could see Daniel, Toby and Shawn getting the ladder truck in place, raising the snorkel to the level of the second floor of the factory.
Yards of hose trailing behind them, Jensen and Tom ran toward the north side of the building and in through the door next to the loading docks. The wall of heat slammed into them first, brilliant red-orange flames so bright they had to squint, devouring everything in its path.
Tom and Jensen turned their hoses on as flaming debris showered down around them, pallets of material bursting into flames, toppling over. Tom stood on Jensen’s right, four or five steps ahead of him, spraying gallons upon gallons of water on the fire, trying desperately to beat it back, get it under control.
Jensen was sweating in his heavy turnout gear, breathing harshly inside his air mask, eyes sweeping everywhere at once, making sure the fire wasn’t wrapping around behind them when he heard it - an ominous groaning noise from directly above him and Tom.
Looking up, Jensen felt his heart slam against his chest - the support beams were on fire. And as he looked he saw the one above them snap. There could be only moments before it crashed down upon them.
“TOM!” Jensen screamed, even though he knew it was practically useless, his voice not carrying from behind his mask and over the sound of the fire to the other man.
He tried to reach Tom, tried to take those five steps to push his friend out of danger, but he only managed to take two before the beam broke away, falling from the ceiling and slamming into them both.
Jensen cried out as the heavy wood struck him on his right shoulder, driving him to the concrete floor but not pinning him. He landed chest down on his hose, driving the breath from him for a moment before he was rolling away from the flaming beam.
“TOM!” Jensen screamed again, still on the floor, eyes searching wildly for his friend as the fire surged up around them.
What he saw terrified him - Tom, unmoving, lying face down, pinned fully underneath the beam that was still on fire.
“Tom!” Jensen’s gloved hand immediately came up to slap his personal alarm that was clipped to the strap of his air tank, activating the device, sending a signal out to Kyle at the engine, letting him know that Jensen was in trouble.
Then, shoulder screaming in protest, Jensen lifted up his hose and turned it on the beam, and Tom, praying that Tom’s turnout gear was still protecting him from the flames.
The last of the fire had just gone out from the beam when movement from his right caught Jensen’s attention. It was Toby and four guys from Station 51, running full tilt into the building. Jensen snapped off his hose as they approached, dropping it to the floor, struggling to get to his knees, his left hand clutching his right arm and shoulder.
“Tom’s pinned!” Jensen yelled as Toby reached his side, helping him stand.
Three of the guys from 51 immediately started lifting the heavy wood from Tom while the other picked up Jensen’s discarded hose, turning it on, pushing the flames back.
Toby got Jensen to his feet then rushed over to pull Tom out once the beam was lifted up high enough.
“We need a backboard!” Jensen yelled to Toby, dropping back down to the floor to check on Tom’s condition.
“I’m on it!” Toby shouted back, sprinting back out of the building.
Another of Station 51’s men was able to get Tom’s hose under control, which was still turned on, whipping around wildly on the floor, and turned it on the flames. A pallet of material exploded to their left and Jensen instinctively covered Tom’s prone body with his own, protecting his injured friend as burning debris rained down.
Just over a minute later Toby returned with the backboard, and as Jensen watched, Tom was transferred to it, face down, because of the air tank on his back.
Throughout the process Tom remained unmoving, eyes closed, breathing shallowly and Jensen desperately wanted his friend out of this fiery hell hole as quick as possible.
“Okay, let’s move!” Toby yelled once Tom was secured to the backboard, and he and two of 51’s men lifted the board and started moving out of the building, Jensen trailing behind, his right arm held tight against his body.
As they got closer to the door, Jensen could see Jared and Alix waiting just outside with a stretcher, their expressions tight and concerned.
The minute Jensen cleared the doorway he was throwing off his helmet, pulling off his air mask as Tom was loaded onto the gurney.
“Beam came down on both of us!” Jensen called to Jared and Alix as the two of them started quickly rolling the stretcher toward the ambulance. “Tom was pinned! He hasn’t moved or opened his eyes!”
Jared nodded. “Let’s get this gear off of him!” he ordered as they came to a stop in front of the bus, and Tom’s helmet, air mask and tank were carefully removed by Toby.
“Let’s roll him,” Alix said. “I’ve got his neck.”
Jared and Alix carefully rolled Tom from his side onto his back and the paramedics went into action, Toby and Jensen standing by helplessly. Alix started putting a C-Collar on Tom as Jared unbuckled Tom’s turnout coat and immediately put his stethoscope to Tom’s chest.
“Pupils are equal and reactive,” Alix called out, moving then to check Tom’s leg, which was lying at a strange angle. “Compound fracture of the left femur!”
Jared shook his head. “I’ve got decreased breath sounds on the right.”
“Dammit,” Jensen swore, knowing that was a sure sign of a broken rib that had punctured a lung.
Alix immediately fastened a blood pressure cuff on Tom’s arm. “BP’s falling!”
“Shit! Tension pneumo - he’s gonna go into respiratory failure if we don’t decompress.”
“Get him on the bus, right now,” Alix ordered, opening the ambulance doors, and Toby helped Jared get the stretcher inside, Jared remaining next to Tom.
“Get an IV going!” Alix told Jared as she closed the doors. “Jen? What’s wrong with your arm?”
“What?” Jensen tore his eyes away from the ambulance. “Nothing. Don’t worry about me. Take care of Tom.”
“Cut the crap and get in the bus. I don’t have time to argue with you,” Alix said sharply, moving toward the driver’s door.
“Go,” Toby told Jensen. “I’ll tell Cap what’s going on.”
Jensen nodded and climbed into the passenger seat of the ambulance for the longest six minute ride he could ever remember. He could hear Jared on the radio to Angel of Mercy hospital, calling in Tom’s condition, which was deteriorating. They needed to get a chest tube in him immediately.
Alix pulled into the ER bay at the hospital with a rush of lights and sirens where one of the ER doctors and a nurse were waiting. Jared and the doctor got the stretcher out of the ambulance and disappeared quickly inside the hospital and down a hallway.
“Hey,” Alix said gently, placing a hand on Jensen’s left arm. “Let’s get you looked at, okay?”
But Jensen remained rooted to the spot, staring down the hallway where Tom had been taken.
“He’s in good hands, Jen.”
Jensen turned his head at his own words echoing back at him and Alix gave him a small smile.
“I need to call Jamie,” Jensen said slowly.
Alix nodded. “Okay, let’s do that first,” she answered and Jensen let himself be led toward the nurse’s station, to a phone call he dreaded having to make.
~~~~~
A short while later Jensen emerged from the exam room, his turnout coat over his left arm, his right arm in a sling. Nothing broken, the doctor had told him, just a wrenched shoulder and some deep muscle bruising. He’d be out of commission for a couple of days while everything healed.
As he stepped out Alix was walking past and she stopped when she saw him.
“How’s Tom?” Jensen asked without preamble.
Alix sighed. “He’s in surgery. His lung’s pretty bad and his spleen may have been nicked by one of the broken ribs as well. He’s got some internal bleeding. They’re setting his leg, too. It’ll be awhile before we know anything.”
Jensen ran a hand over his face. “Dammit.”
“I’m on my way to get coffee. Want some?”
“No. Thanks, Alix.”
“Okay. I’ll be back in a bit. Jamie’s here,” she told him, before moving away.
Jensen turned his head and spotted Tom’s wife, Jamie, sitting by herself in a chair down the hallway, just past the nurse’s station, where Jared was filling out his paperwork on the run. As Jensen got closer he could see that Jamie was crying softly, wiping at her eyes.
He stopped walking when he got next to Jared, swallowing deeply as he looked at Jamie. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jared turn to him, then to also look at Jamie, looking small and scared in the hard plastic chair, waiting anxiously for word on her husband. The two men regarded her silently for a moment before Jensen turned to Jared.
“Now do you understand?” Jensen asked, voice rough, imploring.
He went to Jamie then, going down on his knees next to her chair and she wrapped her arms around Jensen’s neck, burying her face in his shoulder. He held her tight, as she had done for him a year ago, turning his head to look at Jared, his gaze steady and unwavering until Jared had to look away.
~~~~~
Three hours later Jensen lowered himself down onto his sofa, emotionally and physically exhausted. He’d taken a shower as soon as he’d gotten home from the hospital, washing off the soot and grime from the fire, the hot water helping to ease the ache in his arm and shoulder.
He closed his eyes and blew out a long breath, willing himself to relax from the stress of the early morning hours. He’d stayed with Jamie until both her parents and Tom’s had arrived, and word had come down about his friend’s condition.
Thankfully, Tom’s surgery went well. They’d stopped the internal bleeding and luckily his spleen had not been damaged after all. The chest tube that had been inserted was working to help repair Tom’s lung and his broken leg had been set and casted. Tom would be in the hospital for awhile and have quite a recovery period ahead of him, but be would recover, and that was the most important thing.
A soft knock on his door roused Jensen from the doze he’d slipped into, and he pushed himself up wearily from the couch with the arm not in the sling and went to answer it. And immediately wished he hadn’t when he saw Jared standing in the hallway as he opened the door.
For an instant Jensen thought about shutting the door, too exhausted to deal with the younger man right now, but one look at Jared, who looked as tired as he was, made him step back and let Jared inside.
Jensen remained silent as they walked into his living room, waiting for Jared to tell him why he was there.
“I need to know something,” Jared said quietly.
“What is it?”
Jared took a breath. “If you can look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel anything for me I’ll turn around and leave right now and I’ll never bother you again.”
Jensen shook his head, angry, exasperated. “Did you not understand the point I was trying to make at the hospital? That was me, sitting in a chair like that last year, but my outcome was the complete opposite of Jamie’s. She gets to take Tom home in a few weeks. I got to go to a funeral instead.” Jensen paused, drawing in a shaky breath. “They say it’s hardest on those left behind. And it’s true. I know that first hand now and I never want to go through it again. But more than that…” Jensen’s voice softened. “I never want you to go through it.”
Jared took a step toward Jensen, less than an arm’s length away now. “Jensen, please…stop pushing me away, telling yourself it’s what’s best for me. I know what’s best for me and it’s standing right in front of me.”
Jared’s next words were soft and slow. “I’m falling in love with you.”
Jensen shook his head sharply, trying to take a step back, but Jared caught his left arm. “Jared, don’t. I can’t - I can’t do this…”
“Yes, you can. I know you’re scared. I know our lives are dangerous, but I can’t change that. It’s what we do. It’s who we are.”
Jared rubbed his thumb gently against the skin of Jensen’s arm. “I can’t even imagine what it would be like to lose someone I loved as much as you loved Ryan. But have you ever stopped to think that either of us could be killed simply crossing the street? You can’t let your fear hold you back from happiness. Life’s about risks and taking chances. Otherwise it’s not worth living. So take a chance, Jensen. Take a chance on us…”
Then Jared was closing the distance, tilting his head down, pressing his lips softly, hesitantly, against Jensen’s.
At that first touch, that first taste of Jared, the younger man’s words echoing in his head, Jensen gave up the battle, tired of fighting what he knew in his heart was right. He didn’t try and stop the soft sound of surrender he made as he closed his eyes, parting his lips under Jared’s, his body swaying toward the taller man.
One of Jared’s arms came around his waist, strong and sure, while his other hand rose up to cradle the back of Jensen’s head. And as Jared slipped his tongue inside Jensen’s mouth, releasing a quiet moan, Jensen was never gladder that he had denied Jared the kiss he’d wanted the night they first met. That was the wrong time, the wrong situation, and he’d been with Jared that night for the wrong reasons.
But now…now was the right time. When the kiss truly meant something important between them, a commitment, and it was all the more sweeter and beautiful because of it.
Jensen’s left hand went to the small of Jared’s back, slipping up underneath Jared’s t-shirt to press against his warm skin, as he tilted his head, deepening the kiss.
The kiss went on, slow and deep and so fucking perfect that Jensen just let himself drown in the sensations Jared was creating inside him. And with the soft noises Jared was making, he knew he was having the same effect on the other man as well.
The hand wrapped around Jensen’s waist eventually drifted down to cup his ass through the gray sweatpants he was wearing, pulling his body tighter against Jared’s, his right arm now trapped firmly between them in the sling. And when the younger man started a slow grind of his groin against Jensen’s, Jensen couldn’t help groaning into the kiss, pushing his tongue against Jared’s a bit harder.
They remained that way for long minutes, rocking against each other, feeling themselves harden as the kiss grew more intense, until Jensen could feel small tremors racing underneath Jared’s skin.
When Jared pulled back from the kiss Jensen whined in the back of his throat. “Don’t - don’t stop...” he panted, opening his eyes to see Jared’s glassy, desire-filled ones looking back at him, Jared’s lips puffy and shiny.
“You taste so good,” Jared moaned. “Don’t wanna stop…but I’m shakin’ so bad I’m gonna fall down.”
Jensen smiled and hooked the fingers of his left hand in the waistband of Jared’s jeans. “C’mon then,” he said, tugging Jared forward as he walked backwards the few steps to his couch. He dropped down onto the cushions and expected Jared to sit next to him, but instead Jared went to his knees in front of him, running his large hands up Jensen’s legs, spreading them apart, moving between them.
“Jen…” he breathed, leaning in to capture Jensen’s mouth once more, and Jensen’s expression went soft at Jared’s first time use of his nickname and how perfect it sounded falling from the younger man’s lips.
Jensen let his eyes fall closed again, kissing Jared deeply, fingers tangled in Jared’s long hair as Jared’s hands slid further up his legs until his thumbs were rubbing the hard ridge of Jensen’s cock.
“Wanna taste more of you,” Jared murmured into the kiss, nipping at Jensen’s bottom lip.
“God…yeah…” Jensen lifted his hips up slightly and Jared tugged down his boxers and sweatpants, slipping them off Jensen’s feet, tossing them somewhere behind him.
Again Jared ran his hands up Jensen’s legs, bare this time, licking and kissing his way up Jensen’s left thigh.
“Mmm….yeah,” Jensen encouraged him, his fingers threading through Jared’s soft hair.
And then Jared was cupping Jensen’s heavy balls, licking a wet stripe up the underside of Jensen’s hard cock at the same time and Jensen dropped his head back against the couch at the dual sensations.
Then he was groaning deep in his throat, picking his head back up as Jared’s hot, wet mouth slid down over his cock, sucking at the head, lapping at the moisture leaking from the tip.
Jared sank lower then, taking in Jensen’s hard length until Jensen felt the head of his cock bump the back of Jared’s throat. Jared swallowed then, pulling another moan from Jensen before bobbing his head up and down smoothly and quickly, hollowing his cheeks as he sucked Jensen off.
“Feels so fucking good…” Jensen panted as Jared set about pulling his orgasm out of him in record time.
Jared’s hand began fondling Jensen’s balls again and Jensen spread his legs wider, tilting his hips up.
“Just - just a little more,” Jensen breathed, biting his lip as he felt his climax start deep inside. “God, almost there…”
He couldn’t stop his hips pumping upward, and Jared let him, once, twice, and then Jared was humming around his cock as it slid in and out of his mouth, the vibrations the last push Jensen needed.
He came with a sharp cry of Jared’s name, eyes squeezing shut as his cock pulsed down Jared’s throat, over and over, feeling Jared swallow everything he had to give until he was spent, sagging back against the couch, breathing harshly.
Jensen felt his cock slip from between Jared’s lips then the younger man was rising up, licking at Jensen’s bottom lip.
“You taste fucking amazing…you sound fucking amazing when you come. I - “ Jared’s breath stuttered and Jensen realized he was stroking himself through his jeans.
“Jared, wait, wait,” Jensen breathed, tugging at Jared’s arm, nipping back at Jared’s lips. “Wanna taste you, too…”
Jared groaned, his eyes dark with arousal, plundering Jensen’s mouth hard and fast before pulling back, hands fumbling with his zipper. Jensen leaned in to help, suddenly irritated at having his right arm incapacitated and impatiently pulled at the strap of his sling, getting it over his head and tossing the material away.
Jared opened his mouth to protest, but what came out was a moan instead as Jensen got his hand inside Jared’s jeans and stroked him firmly through his boxers.
“C’mon, Jare, get ‘em off…let me touch you…”
Jeans, boxers, shoes, socks and even the t-shirt were quickly discarded and then Jared was standing gloriously naked in front of Jensen, his stiff cock standing out from his body, the head red and wet with precome.
Jensen wasted no time, sliding to the edge of the couch where he wrapped his left hand around Jared’s cock, and slipped his mouth down over the head.
Jared’s taste exploded across his tongue - salty, bitter and musky - and he tongued at the slit, drawing more of the clear fluid out to swallow down. He heard Jared suck in a breath and one of his large hands settled on Jensen’s head, fingers sliding through the short strands of his hair, while the other gripped his left shoulder.
Jensen opened his mouth wider and took in as much of Jared’s cock as he could, a heavy weight against his tongue, steel wrapped in silk. He started sucking, his hand stroking at the same time as he bobbed his head, bringing Jared ever closer to his orgasm.
“Oh god, Jen…not gonna last,” Jared warned him with a groan. “So close already…god, your mouth…don’t stop, don’t stop,” he rambled.
And Jensen didn’t, pressing his tongue firmly against the bundle of nerves on the underside of Jared’s cock and the younger man jerked at the sensation, a burst of precome Jensen’s only warning before Jared was coming.
“Jen!” Jared cried out, fingers tightening in Jensen’s hair as he climaxed, hips stuttering.
Jensen swallowed down Jared’s release, hot bursts that coated his tongue and throat, Jared’s taste intoxicating.
He released Jared’s cock as the younger man’s orgasm subsided and Jared sagged forward, collapsing onto the couch next to Jensen, flushed and smiling gently.
Jensen smiled as well, then leaned in to kiss Jared, long and slow, bringing them both back down until they drew apart, resting their foreheads together.
“I’m falling in love with you, too,” Jensen whispered.
~~~~~
Later, tangled naked together underneath the sheets of Jensen’s bed, the late morning sun peeking in through the blinds, Jensen spoke the words that had been lying heavily on his mind, a confession he felt he needed to make.
“I need to apologize,” he began, and Jared shifted, raising himself up to look at Jensen, confusion on his face.
“For what?”
“The night we met, at the bar…it was the one year anniversary of Ryan’s death.”
Jared’s eyes went soft and he ran his fingers through Jensen’s short hair. “Ah, Jen…”
“I was so lonely and you were there and you were interested…” Jensen said, the words tumbling out of him.
“Shhh…Jen…” Jared tried to quiet him, but Jensen needed to get this out.
“I missed Ryan so damn much and I wanted to use you as a substitute, to pretend…” He swallowed, reaching to rub his thumb across Jared’s cheekbone. “It was wrong. I never should’ve…used you like that, and I’m sorry.”
Jared shook his head slowly, a soft smile on his face as he turned and kissed Jensen’s palm. “It’s okay, Jen. You don’t have to apologize. I understand why you did it, and if the situation had been reversed I may have done the same thing. I don’t care what the circumstances were that brought us together. Just that they did. We’re here now…and that’s all that matters.”
And as Jared leaned in to capture his mouth for a long, sweet kiss, vanquishing his worry, Jensen had to agree.
~~~~~
THREE WEEKS LATER
The morning was clear and bright, not a cloud in the sky, the sun shining down on the crew of Station 127 as they brandished sponges and hoses and towels - washing and polishing the engine and the ambulance until the red metal gleamed.
Jensen, Kyle, Shawn and Daniel were washing the engine while Toby helped out Alix and Jared with the bus, easy laughter and taunts flowing between everyone, as the truck guys had handed the engine guys their asses during the basketball game a short while earlier. And why? Because the truck guys had drafted 6’ 4” Jared Padalecki to their team. Jensen would’ve protested the advantage but it gave him an opportunity to manhandle his lover as he guarded him during the game, so he wasn’t complaining.
In fact, he wasn’t complaining about life in general these days. Tom’s recovery was going better than his doctor had hoped, and he should be back at work in another four weeks. Jensen had been by the house several times in the last three weeks to see his friend and to tell him that he and Jared were together now. To say that Tom was happy at the news was an understatement.
Things were great between Jared and him, too. As with any new relationship, they couldn’t get enough of one another, spending their days off together, whenever Jensen wasn’t in class.
They started dating, as backward as that may have been, considering how their relationship started, but it was working for them and that’s all that mattered. They went out to dinner, caught a Yankees game when the Rangers were in town, went to the movies and had a picnic in Central Park. They were even planning on taking vacation time together next month to visit San Antonio. But most of all they talked. Some nights they didn’t even leave the apartment, Jensen’s head in Jared’s lap on the couch - just talking, getting to really know one another. And being woken up to soft, lazy kisses, then making love to Jared, felt more amazing each and every time.
He hadn’t laughed or smiled so often in a long time, and he was thankful every day that Jared had pushed past his defenses and hadn’t given up on him. He would always care for Ryan and he’d never forget him, and Jared understood that, and Jensen hoped that Ryan was smiling down on him and his newfound happiness.
A wet sponge smacking into Jensen's back pulled him from his thoughts and he whirled around to see Jared laughing, a smile on his face, his dimples flashing.
“Oh, you think that’s funny, do you?” Jensen called over, swinging around the reel line he’d been using on the engine’s tires, intending to soak the young medic, but at the last second Jared dodged, pulling an unsuspecting Alix in front of him and she caught the full force of the spray instead.
Sputtering indignantly as the rest of the guys laughed, Alix wasted no time in throwing her own sponge at Jared, catching him on the side of his head. This time it was Jensen’s turn to laugh as the soap suds slid down Jared’s face.
Before an all out water war could get started, the station alarm sounded and it was instantly all business with the crew. The sponges, buckets and towels were quickly stowed away inside the apparatus room as they all made their way to the equipment room to pull on their gear. They were joined by Jeff and Haley Bullock, who had transferred over from second shift to take Tom’s place while he was recovering.
The dispatcher’s voice came over the loudspeaker - two alarm structure fire at a manufacturing facility in Station 99’s jurisdiction - they were requesting assistance.
They rolled up onto the scene and quickly assessed the situation, with Jeff on the walkie-talkie to 99’s captain. Thick, black, acrid smoke was streaming out of the front of the two-story building where 99’s men were pouring water in, though the flames were difficult to see.
Kyle immediately went to work hooking up the hydrant to the engine as Jeff called out orders to everyone else.
“Bullock! Grab an inch and a half and assist 99 on the west side!”
“Right, Cap!” Haley answered, quickly hooking the hose line over her shoulder and moving toward the building.
“Sanders! Larson! Get that ladder up to the roof!”
“On it, Cap!” Shawn called back and he and Toby started getting the ladder into position.
“Ackles! Hoffmann! Grab the chainsaw and the K-12 and get on the roof, we need to ventilate. 99 can’t see what they’re doing. Watch yourselves up there.”
“Got it, Cap!” Jensen replied, and he and Daniel pulled on their air masks then retrieved both saws from the compartment on the engine.
Moments later they were climbing up the ladder and onto the roof, treading carefully. They spaced themselves apart, then fired up the saws and went to work cutting holes to allow the smoke to escape. Then Station 99 could advance into the building with their hoses and clearer visibility.
Minutes later both Jensen and Daniel had their first holes cut open and the thick smoke started pouring out as they moved to cut another two holes further in on the roof.
It happened without warning.
One second Jensen was using the chainsaw and the next the roof under him gave way and he plummeted down into the building.
For a brief second Jensen couldn’t comprehend that he was falling until his body slammed into the razor sharp edge of a large piece of machinery. He cried out as he felt the metal pierce through his turnout pants, slicing open his skin, and agonizing pain shot through his right leg.
He bounced off the machinery, which slowed his fall but didn’t stop it, next impacting a large stack of wooden pallets, the top two of which crushed under the combined weight of Jensen and his heavy air tank. The stack of pallets toppled over, bringing Jensen with it, tossing him the remainder of the way to the cement floor.
Jensen hit hard, landing awkwardly on his air tank, driving the breath from his lungs as the pallets tumbled down upon him. He struggled to catch his breath, suddenly realizing he was no longer breathing in clean oxygen but the thick smoke instead. That could only mean that either his air hose had been pierced or he had lost the positive seal on his mask.
He struggled to move under the weight of the wooden pallets, but his limbs wouldn’t cooperate, his right leg hurting so bad it must be broken, though he could feel wetness coating his thigh. His vision started to swim with the lack of clean air to breathe and even with the heat of the fire around him he started to grow cold.
Above the cracking and snapping of the flames Jensen could vaguely make out voices shouting and he tried to call out, let them know where he was, but he couldn’t draw enough breath, feeling himself on the verge of unconsciousness.
Then the voices were there, right above him, and hands started pulling away pieces of the pallets and roof debris that were on top of him, uncovering him moments later, and he found himself looking up into the concerned faces of Shawn, Toby and Daniel from behind their air masks.
“Jensen!” Shawn yelled. “God, Jen, hang on. We’re gonna get you outta here.”
“Okay, let’s lift him!” Toby called and Jensen felt two pairs of hands hook under his shoulders and legs and raise him up quickly but carefully while another set of hands supported his neck.
He was on a backboard seconds later, lying on his side, being carried through the smoke and flames and out into the bright sunshine where he was placed on a stretcher.
Someone was yelling to get his gear off of him, his body feeling like a rag doll as his helmet, mask and tank were removed and he was rolled carefully onto his back. He struggled to draw a breath of the fresh air, his lungs burning from inhaling the hot, acrid smoke.
“Jensen!” Jared’s face swam into view above his, and he blinked heavily, starting to feel disconnected from his body that was growing steadily colder.
“Hang on, Jen,” Jared told him, slipping an oxygen mask over his face. “Breathe for me, c’mon…” he pleaded, snapping open Jensen’s turnout coat and placing his stethoscope to Jensen’s chest.
“Where the hell is all this blood coming from?” Alix called out, a tinge of panic in her voice. “Jared, help me get his boots and pants off!”
Jared moved out of Jensen’s field of vision and he felt his boots removed and his turnout pants tugged off.
“Shit! Jared!”
“Oh god dammit, it’s his femoral artery! Alix get the pressure dressing, now! He’s bleeding out!”
Jensen heard all of this as if from a great distance, his vision going dark around the edges, and he felt himself start to drift. He was so tired…
“Stay with me, Jen, stay with me!” Jared’s scared voice reached his ears.
Jensen tried to reach for Jared, to say his name, but his battered body wouldn’t obey him, giving in to the darkness instead…
“We’re losing him!”
“NO!”
~~~~~
Consciousness returned slowly and painfully to Jensen. Everything hurt - his head, his back, his chest, every muscle in his body - but mainly his right leg.
His eyes blinked open slowly, a bit at a time, and things gradually came into focus. After a moment of disorientation he realized he was lying on his back in a hospital bed, an IV in his left arm. He felt the oxygen cannula in his nose and took a slow, experimental deep breath, grateful to find he could do so again. Swallowing was still somewhat painful, though, his throat raw from inhaling the hot smoke for too long a period of time. He was covered with a blanket from his waist down, but he could feel that his right thigh was swathed in thick bandages.
Thankful that he was still in one piece, he allowed himself a small smile and turned his head to the side - to find an empty chair.
No Jared.
It took a moment to register that his lover wasn’t there, and when it did the smile slid from Jensen’s face. He’d just naturally assumed that Jared would be there, waiting for him to wake up, and it hit him like a punch to the gut that he wasn’t.
And his mind went instantly, immediately someplace it shouldn’t have. A knee-jerk emotional reaction - Jared had now experienced it for himself, to nearly lose someone to the job - and he couldn’t handle it. He was running like Jensen had. That bastard. He’d made Jensen take the chance, take the risk, for love. To open his heart again. Only for Jared to trample all over it. It was hard enough losing Ryan, but now Jared, too? How dare he?
Deep down he knew it was stupid and irrational to be thinking like this. There could be a million perfectly valid reasons why Jared wasn’t here, but at the moment the logical part of his brain was being soundly beaten down by the stronger emotional part.
Hot, angry tears threatened at his train of thought, but before one could fall, the door to his room opened and Jared was struggling to get through the opening with a teddy bear nearly as tall as he was. His eyes slid over to the bed and widened the moment he saw Jensen looking back.
“Jen!” A huge, relieved smile lit up Jared’s face and he dropped the stuffed animal, hurrying over to the side of the bed where he grasped Jensen’s hand. “God, you’re awake!”
Jensen blinked furiously. With his emotions swinging so swiftly from one end of the spectrum to the other in the matter of a few minutes, he was having trouble trying to process the fact that Jared was actually standing next to his bed.
“You - you’re here,” Jensen whispered hoarsely, his voice like sandpaper.
Jared cocked his head, regarding Jensen quizzically. “Well, yeah. Where else would I be?” he asked with a smile.
When Jensen remained silent he could almost see the light bulb go on over Jared’s head, that he knew what Jensen had assumed, and he sat down on the edge of the bed, running a hand through Jensen’s hair.
“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified that I was going to lose you right then and there,” Jared confessed softly. “Shit, Jen, you did die. You flatlined in the bus before we got here.” He placed his hand on Jensen’s chest. “I had to - to…” He paused, inhaling raggedly, and Jensen covered his hand with his own.
Jared swallowed then captured Jensen with his warm, hazel eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Jen. I love you and I’m not going anywhere.”
“Love you, too,” Jensen whispered. “I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions. When I opened my eyes and you weren’t there - “
Jared shook his head. “Don’t apologize. I know how that must’ve looked to you and I’m sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up.”
“I wouldn’t have woken up at all if it wasn’t for you. You saved my life.”
Jared tapped a finger on Jensen’s chest. “Don’t make me do it again, you hear me? No more high-wire acts without a net or at least without someone there to catch you.”
Jensen’s tone was light, but his eyes were serious. “What about you? You want the job? Will you catch me?”
Jared’s soft smile went straight to Jensen’s heart as the younger man leaned in for a kiss.
“Always, Jen. Always.”
THE END
Whew! Well, there you have it, folks! I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. And who knows, there may be further adventures of Fireman!Jensen and Paramedic!Jared in the future. :-)
Oh, and bonus points to anyone who knew that Station 127 was the real station at which the show Emergency! filmed - and that I was lucky enough to visit several years ago. It's still like walking onto a television film set! :-)
Read the sequel to Light My Fire - PLAYING WITH FIRE