Hello
I have finally got a new computer AND an internet connection. Life is indeed shiny.
Vista is my enemy. I do not like it, and it is overtly plotting my fall into insanity. It is against me and every other right-thinking person in the world. I am no longer friends with Bill Gates.
Working for the cops has it's advantages. One of these is a new fund of amusing anecdotes. My two favourites are as follows:
1) I was at a training course in a far flung suburb of Perth, and asked a couple of cops who work at the same station as me for a lift back to work. They only had a secure sedan, which is a great anecdote by itself, because it's like being in a moving sound proof booth while everyone around you thinks you are a criminal. Being in a sound proof booth I was unable to make conversation with the two cops in the front, despite a valiant attempt to discuss her children with one of them. So I started to fall asleep. Suddenly I hear the sirens. I'm under the impression that I have inadvertantly fallen in with dodgy cops and they're just sounded the siren so that they can go through the red lights. Instead it turns out that someone has run through the red light in front of them and is even now erratically swerving across the three lanes available to him (thankfully a heavily-shrubbed median strip stopped him from having six lanes available to him). I am in the back of a police car while it does the high-speed pursuit thing.
The car eventually pulls up into a driveway and a large bearded guy gets out, with a bottle of beer in one hand. The cops get out and start to arrest him. It looks like a cheap TV show. They actually had to pin him down on the ground to get cuffs on him. A highway patrol car comes by to help. They're all doing cop things. I am, meanwhile, in the back of a secure police van, which means that I can't get out and I can't hear anything. I have NO idea what is going on.
One of the cops finally comes around to my door, does the cop thing where she half crouched down and looked up and down the road, presumably to make sure that there were no other drunken car-wielding maniacs nearby before she opened the car door to tell me what the heck was going on. I wasn't allowed out of the car at all. On the bright side, I woke right up after that.
2) I had a person come in to give a crash report because a car had landed on his roof. There was a steep slope across the road and he was on the down side of it. The fellow on the upside of the road had not put his handbrake on. So the car accelerated down his driveway and landed on the roof of the house across the road, whose owner had to come in and report it as a car crash. The fire brigade had to come to remove it. No-one was hurt and the damage to the roof wasnt' too bad, which just makes it funnier. It's like "Chitty Chitty, Bang Bang" crossed with "Funniest Home Videos".
Vista is my enemy. I do not like it, and it is overtly plotting my fall into insanity. It is against me and every other right-thinking person in the world. I am no longer friends with Bill Gates.
Working for the cops has it's advantages. One of these is a new fund of amusing anecdotes. My two favourites are as follows:
1) I was at a training course in a far flung suburb of Perth, and asked a couple of cops who work at the same station as me for a lift back to work. They only had a secure sedan, which is a great anecdote by itself, because it's like being in a moving sound proof booth while everyone around you thinks you are a criminal. Being in a sound proof booth I was unable to make conversation with the two cops in the front, despite a valiant attempt to discuss her children with one of them. So I started to fall asleep. Suddenly I hear the sirens. I'm under the impression that I have inadvertantly fallen in with dodgy cops and they're just sounded the siren so that they can go through the red lights. Instead it turns out that someone has run through the red light in front of them and is even now erratically swerving across the three lanes available to him (thankfully a heavily-shrubbed median strip stopped him from having six lanes available to him). I am in the back of a police car while it does the high-speed pursuit thing.
The car eventually pulls up into a driveway and a large bearded guy gets out, with a bottle of beer in one hand. The cops get out and start to arrest him. It looks like a cheap TV show. They actually had to pin him down on the ground to get cuffs on him. A highway patrol car comes by to help. They're all doing cop things. I am, meanwhile, in the back of a secure police van, which means that I can't get out and I can't hear anything. I have NO idea what is going on.
One of the cops finally comes around to my door, does the cop thing where she half crouched down and looked up and down the road, presumably to make sure that there were no other drunken car-wielding maniacs nearby before she opened the car door to tell me what the heck was going on. I wasn't allowed out of the car at all. On the bright side, I woke right up after that.
2) I had a person come in to give a crash report because a car had landed on his roof. There was a steep slope across the road and he was on the down side of it. The fellow on the upside of the road had not put his handbrake on. So the car accelerated down his driveway and landed on the roof of the house across the road, whose owner had to come in and report it as a car crash. The fire brigade had to come to remove it. No-one was hurt and the damage to the roof wasnt' too bad, which just makes it funnier. It's like "Chitty Chitty, Bang Bang" crossed with "Funniest Home Videos".