Bartending
Bartending can be so much fun, but it can also suck because you have no control over who you have to talk to. Case in point, had to talk to the ex Jayme last nite. It was actually really nice to talk to her and see her. Plus she has gotten hotter since the last time we spoke, which wasn't on a good note by the way. She about fell over when I actually said hi to her instead of the other way around. She of course then proceeded to sit at my end of the bar and chat for about an hour. She is miserable. She hates school, hates her job, and it was pretty obvious that she isn't happy with her boyfriend who is a complete loser by the way. It was sort of funny because overall I am pretty happy with life except for the fact that lately events have been throwing into sharp relief the fact that I haven't dated anyone since Jayme. Thus seeing her last nite only made things worse. Not worse in the sense that I wanted to be with her or anything like that. Just the fact that my love life is severely lacking as of late. It made it pretty hard to put a smile on my face the rest of the nite because of course I was pretty introspective. I don't know where I am going with this. I am just sort of letting it out on "paper" hoping that maybe that will help. Coupled with my last post I am sure it is easy to see how I have been feeling as of late. It is sort of a paradox. Happy about the way things are going, but at the same time not satisfied. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGg! It feels like my whole life has been this way with just different themes. Sometimes relationships, other times school and work. If this is what being "successful" after school is like well then I gotta say it isn't all it has cracked up to be. Oh well, I guess on the upshot, I did mend a bridge and now maybe one more person from my past has a better opinion of me now. Woot? Blah! I need a very long vacation, or a very stiff drink.