two years later
What a long strange year it's been.
It was a rough one, from the uncertainty of what Lindsay and I were to what we became, more medical and legal ups and downs, losing a close family member and alternating between barely holding it together and completely losing it.
I said last year that I would never remove anyone from the list I made then. It's still a true statement. Here is that post. In case I don't mention someone directly, I don't want people getting pissy.
I keep learning about myself the longer I deal with being the way I am. I realized in the past week that these periods of misery that I go through are when I try to not be me--when I isolate myself from my friends, when I don't wear my heart on my sleeve. It just doesn't make any sense to me now not to live in the way that makes me the happiest I can be.
Time for the thanks.
Isabel. My cat rocks, guys. She made me a single parent and it's a role I've grown pretty comfortable in. I just need to find her a suitable mother now.
Lindsay. Because of her, I learned a lot about the kind of guy I am. Besides, if anyone needed a girlfriend at that time, it was me.
The IRC group. I'd bust the lj user system listing you all, but you cheered my successes and were there in my failures, doing your best to keep me grounded whether you knew it or not. Most of all, you guys always seemed to have weird links that would make me forget about my problems for a little while.
brawi, minsies, draemorticus, runeinalya, rruhland. In many ways you guys remind me of the group of old friends I have here. It's a strange yet comfortable dynamic. I'm happy to have met 40% of you and look forward to the other 60% in a couple months.
Everyone I've gotten to meet: felbeth9, thisdarkthing, Pat and Brad and all the rest. Being able to go to DC or Philly or Williamsburg and soon Indiana to hang out with you guys, it's all worth it.
stryfey, you're the great hope for us now, since your girlfriend is still sane. And no planting any seed, especially not in the direction of thisdarkthing, you dirty little Canadimog.
dilatio, you're the man now, dog.
brightdreams and inghean. You two along with one other helped steer me through a really difficult time. Someday I'll thank you in song, or at least by cooking.
And last but not least, mysocalledleif. Cor, I'm not going to embarrass you by saying things you hate publicly. So, thank you and all that stuff we don't talk about.
I'm more impressed with myself for managing to keep this journal going for a year. Here's hoping I make it back posting for a third year.
It was a rough one, from the uncertainty of what Lindsay and I were to what we became, more medical and legal ups and downs, losing a close family member and alternating between barely holding it together and completely losing it.
I said last year that I would never remove anyone from the list I made then. It's still a true statement. Here is that post. In case I don't mention someone directly, I don't want people getting pissy.
I keep learning about myself the longer I deal with being the way I am. I realized in the past week that these periods of misery that I go through are when I try to not be me--when I isolate myself from my friends, when I don't wear my heart on my sleeve. It just doesn't make any sense to me now not to live in the way that makes me the happiest I can be.
Time for the thanks.
Isabel. My cat rocks, guys. She made me a single parent and it's a role I've grown pretty comfortable in. I just need to find her a suitable mother now.
Lindsay. Because of her, I learned a lot about the kind of guy I am. Besides, if anyone needed a girlfriend at that time, it was me.
The IRC group. I'd bust the lj user system listing you all, but you cheered my successes and were there in my failures, doing your best to keep me grounded whether you knew it or not. Most of all, you guys always seemed to have weird links that would make me forget about my problems for a little while.
brawi, minsies, draemorticus, runeinalya, rruhland. In many ways you guys remind me of the group of old friends I have here. It's a strange yet comfortable dynamic. I'm happy to have met 40% of you and look forward to the other 60% in a couple months.
Everyone I've gotten to meet: felbeth9, thisdarkthing, Pat and Brad and all the rest. Being able to go to DC or Philly or Williamsburg and soon Indiana to hang out with you guys, it's all worth it.
stryfey, you're the great hope for us now, since your girlfriend is still sane. And no planting any seed, especially not in the direction of thisdarkthing, you dirty little Canadimog.
dilatio, you're the man now, dog.
brightdreams and inghean. You two along with one other helped steer me through a really difficult time. Someday I'll thank you in song, or at least by cooking.
And last but not least, mysocalledleif. Cor, I'm not going to embarrass you by saying things you hate publicly. So, thank you and all that stuff we don't talk about.
I'm more impressed with myself for managing to keep this journal going for a year. Here's hoping I make it back posting for a third year.