Bunny: Moon Lovers
Title:Moon Lovers
Pairings:Yoochun ♥ Junsu
Rating:NC-17
Author: agnetalovek
Beta: ting5
Genre:Sci-fi, supernatural, romance
Summary:Yoochun and Junsu are aboard the same ship they were on five years ago. This time as a family instead of lovers. One has no memories of the past, except for betrayal. The other one lives in oblivion and hopes to confess to his guardian.
ATTENTION: ANYONE FROM SPAIN?
Yoochun woke up all sweaty and sticky. He had one of his old nightmares, the memories from his childhood that were still haunting him. Now that he was awake, he couldn’t remember precise what he was dreaming about but only that it was about him and his first love.
Having enough of the soft water bed Yoochun got up and dressed himself in grey cardigans, which showed his toned chest and a pair of white jogging pants. The packet of cigarettes on the table seemed so alluring like it was calling for him, begging to be lit and brought to his mouth.
Giving in to the lure, Yoochun went to the smoking area to take a drag. They were prohibited to smoke at any other places on the ship except these designated areas. He could feel the cigarette dangling between his fingers and he wondered if it would leave behind any kind of smell.
But of course it will. Tobacco smelled awful like shit, which was what Junsu told him once when he had gone to smoke and returned smelling so. Yoochun wondered how Junsu would react to this since he had told the younger man that he had quit.
Spoke of the devil, Yoochun saw Junsu walking towards him with a sullen face, a mix of pouting and anger. Thank god for the glass shielding Junsu from seeing Yoochun’s face as only half his body was showing. Not to mention the smoke inside the cabin making it hard for people from outside to see anything inside.
Deep down Yoochun hoped that Junsu would just give up for now and let Yoochun find him afterwards instead. But luck was not on his side because Junsu had used his small fists to bang on the glass while shouting something from the other side. For sure he was really mad now.
There was still a little of the cigarette left but Yoochun decided it was enough. He walked out of the room only to see Junsu pouting at him with both his cheeks puffed out. Yoochun bent closer to him using both his hands to pinch Junsu’s cheeks, which hurt a bit.
Junsu let out a whining sound and rubbed the sting out of his cheeks. “Chunnie, why are you always doing this to me?”
Junsu made such an adorable sight, clad in his mini-shorts and a shirt that was a little too large for him. “It’s because you’re too irresistible. And didn’t I tell you not to call me Chunnie? I know calling me Appa’s impossible but at least called me Yoochun?”
Junsu brushed him off pretending not to hear anything. He clung to Yoochun’s left arm and quickly switched subject. “We’ll be arriving on the Moon in Hostmaty06 solar system soon and I wanted to ask you in enjoying the view with me.”
Junsu slowly led Yoochun to the middle sector’s glass chamber where no one used anymore. It was pitch black inside and he could barely see his own fingers. When Junsu turned on a switch all the pallets were lifted and he could see a shining globe.
It was round and shiny that enabled Yoochun to see his own reflection on the window. Just for a moment he thought he saw something or rather someone moved behind him. It was a young man who had a small frame and dressed in a white robe. His hair was flowing behind him like water and has emerald orbs which were cold and piercing staring back at him.
Yoochun flinched when Junsu’s head came to rest on his shoulder tearing his gaze away from the figure. When Yoochun turned around to see if the person he saw through the window’s reflection was real or not, no one was there. Was it disappointment he felt inside he thought as he chewed on his nails tasting the hints of tobacco left there. It didn’t take long for Junsu to notice this bad habit of his as Junsu slapped his hand away.
“You should stop biting you nail. It’s a bad habit and can affect the youngsters like me. What if I started to eat bugger?” Junsu giggled when he said the last word making Yoochun thought what a child Junsu still was no matter how hard he tried to act mature.
Outside a bluish silver glow lightened up the room they were in and allowed Junsu to study Yoochun’s face intensely. Yoochun’s long, hair was gathered up in a pony tail leaving several tendrils loose that framed his face. There was this yearning sensation burning inside him which wanted to burst and escape. However, even Junsu knew that would be a dangerous bet as love always be.
“When do you think you can tell me about my parents? About my mom and dad?”
Yoochun looked hesitant for a moment as he seemed to be thinking real hard from the frown that decorated his forehead. He sighed and rubbed his eyes tiredly, “How many times do we have to talk about this? I told you when the time is up and when I’m ready.” He tried to smile reassuringly at Junsu who was looking dejected.
“There is not much to tell anyway. I promise that I’ll tell you soon.” With that Yoochun once again faced the windows looking out into the vast Universe. It was big and dark like the pit of hell though scientifically hell has not yet been proven to exist.
Junsu let the door shut behind him as he left the room and escaped to Hyukjae’s chamber. After knocking for more than ten times and still received no answer Junsu walked back to his own room. His shoulders were slumped and his face full of despair. In his room he washed his face trying to clear his mind. While he was wiping his face he bumped into his desk stubbed his toes pretty hard. Letting out a wince as he hopped up and down he fell onto the bed and ended up hugging himself.
Somehow Junsu fell asleep and woke up some time later as he sensed the presence of someone beside him. With his eyes still closed he could feel a pair of arms wrapped around him and the smell tobacco wafted into his nose. Groggily Junsu smiled and snuggled closer to the warmth Yoochun emanated feeling secure. He inhaled deeply savoring the tobacco smell which not many people would be doing.
“We’ve landed. Jaejoong and Leeteuk scolded me for your bad temperament. I’m here now as a white knight to ask for you to come with me and live happily ever after in our extravagant white castle.”
“You make me feel like a woman Chunnie.” Junsu only wanted to tease him and his hormones were acting up making him said such stupid words. Blushing deeply Junsu ducked his head under the covers and only came out when he felt Yoochun leaving the bed to let him change.
Yoochun stood waiting behind the door as Junsu changed into something more comfortable most likely thick, layered clothes. He disliked the tight suits especially the white ones which smelled like strawberries. Jaejoong, their team leader loved strawberries and enjoyed spraying all of their suits with strawberry flavored spray.
When Junsu came out he was a little taken aback to find Yoochun waiting for him. Letting out a hiss he scolded, “You shouldn’t do that. I’ll die from a heart attack if you keep frightening me like that.”
“It’s not my intentions Junsu because I always wanted you to live for 100 years.” And maybe even outlive me this time his last thought seemed to come out of nowhere.
They proceeded to the dock room and behind it was the MR2 substance pool. There Junsu dove in to cover his body with the gel-like liquid before he can then wear the Blancas suit. He gagged at the strong strawberry smell and cursed. At this time Changmin was waiting for him on the other side of the pool and caught a few curses he was mumbling
“Hey Junsu, be careful that Yunho doesn’t hear you or you'll be in deep shit.”
“Why are you not scolding me? Is threesome that much fun?”
Changmin chuckled at this and didn’t retort because the group was already gathering and the blue team leader, Leeteuk was there. Leeteuk explained their mission which was on a foreign Moon and warned them of the possibilities of aliens and sudden attacks from space. They were most vulnerable when they are outside the boundaries of their ship.
Yoochun warned Junsu to stay close to him at all times once they leave the ship. Junsu was ready to protest that he was already a grown-up responsible for himself whether Yoochun liked it or not. But of course he did not say this out loud because it might hurt Yoochun’s feelings and he was not ready to go against Yoochun yet.
When they were outside Yoochun released the belt connecting Junsu to him and told the boy to look around for a bit on his own. Junsu was glad to finally having a little freedom. He strolled down the endless rocks and Sahara. Sometimes he would come across some strange crops and trees that have what looked like paintings inscribed on them.
Junsu took samples of things that he thought were interesting and packed them into small containers filled with dung and sand. Not knowing how much time has passed Junsu continued to wander until Changmin called for him to return. Junsu had to locate where he was with the GPS system. When he arrived at the gathering spot Yoochun was nowhere to be found even Jaejoong could not locate him
No one was especially worried since they all knew Yoochun’s working habit where he would forget about everything until his work was done. Junsu was the only one who had a bad feeling but he let himself be convinced by Leeteuk that Yoochun was having a good time down in the large pond. And just as predicted Yoochun returned after Jaejoong had just finished with his cooking and everyone was cleaning up.
Yoochun was shivering with lips that had turned blue and he was on the verge of collapsing. JE was quickly brought back to the ship and Junsu immediately followed closely behind. Yoochun seemed to be in bad shape and all Junsu could do was hovered worriedly at the door of the medical room. Jaejoong took off Yoochun’s Blancas while Yunho prepared warm soup and hot tea.
When Jaejoong called him in to tell him that Yoochun’s going to be fine Junsu felt like he could finally breathe again. Yoochun’s condition was not grave and he suffered no injuries judging from his MRI. Junsu was the one shaking like he was the one exposed to the cold instead. Seeing this Jaejoong wanted to move Junsu back to his room but the boy refused to let go of Yoochun’s hand. No matter how hard he pulled their hands remained entwined.
“Jaejoong, just let Junsu rest here for tonight,” Changmin said while smiling mischievously. He had his face turned towards the window so that Jaejoong would not notice this and questioned him.
But none of them noticed the blood squeezed black tulip, which was now crying in YooSu’s hands.
***
Junsu woke up to find Yoochun’s bed empty. He looked around but found no traces of Yoochun. Getting worried he climbed out of the sheets slipping his feet into the slippers. His arm was numb which meant that Yoochun had just left not too long ago. He went around searching for him and the first place he stopped by was the smoking room.
To his dismay Yoochun was not in the smoking room, and so he went to the next destination in his mind, Yoochun’s study. When he opened the door he heard a cracking sound and thought he broke something. Looking around he saw that there was no one was inside and he cannot help but wonder again how did Yoochun attained all those books filling shelves after shelves..
They were all marked from 1995 onwards and stopped at 3016. Junsu remembered the elders spoke of it as the doomsday, when the earth came to its end and for humanity the weak ones were killed by an epidemic or a natural disaster. Only the strong ones were left and they made used of what was left on Earth to escape to space.
Junsu’s hands came in contact with the books and the holograms disappeared as a red light came on and a beeping was heard signaling there was an intruder. Junsu quickly entered the password to Yoochun’s study which the others did not know he knew. With the alarm off Junsu took his time looking around feeling relaxed and comfortable.
The oriental pattered cushions from the red leather couches and dirty clothing were thrown around the room and not to mention the mess Yoochun had made with all his files. It was truly a wonder how Yoochun managed to find anything at all in this mess. The black chair behind the desk suddenly seemed compelling to Junsu luring him there to experience what Yoochun had felt when he sat there. There were pictures of them on Yoochun’s desk taken when they visited other planets.
Looking at them memories came flooding back to Junsu like gushing water from a stream. The happy times when things weren’t this complicated, when he could still sort out his feelings comprehending the different love between family and lovers. His gaze landed on one of the photos which he found odd in some sense because he cannot remember ever posing for such a shot. The blue background looked real and the image of him was smiling widely with eyes twinkling. He looked happy and seemed to be experiencing the best time of his life.
The more Junsu studied the photo the odder he found it to be. Yoochun looked incredibly gallant in the photo with a confident smile on his face. Another thing that Junsu observed was that the image of him the picture was taller than Yoochun. Feeling strange Junsu decided to search the desk drawers hoping to find some clues that may explained about the guy that looked like him in the photo.
He fumbled around and found a drawer that was locked. He tried using the same password for the alarm and luckily the drawer opened. Inside he saw a red journal, which most likely belonged to Yoochun. Carefully he took it out placing it on the desk hesitating whether he should read it or to just leave it untouched. Against his better judgment Junsu went ahead and flipped it open and started to read.
Year: 6745
Date: January 2nd
Today I met him again or I should say the replicate of HIM. He was sedated as the doctor claimed that the electronic waves were too much for him to handle. His sleeping features just looked so much like him.
I’m afraid to say his name as it hurt knowing that he is really gone. I still blame myself for his departure and I cannot seem to think clearly. Jaejoong said it was because I damaged my brain. Well, as much as I’d love to believe him but his actions are making me doubtful.
Junsu flipped several pages back to the older entries.
Year: 6743
Date: May 21st
Junsu asked me to go shopping with him today. He even bought me a pair of cross earrings. He kept one of them and gave me the other one. I was so happy when he hugged me today and kissed me on my cheeks. But it was rather disappointing when we met Jaejoong and his boyfriend, Siwon. No matter how many glares I threw at Jaejoong, he just wouldn’t budge and continued to stay until I cannot take it and left.
Maybe I should confess to Junsu?
It was painful for Junsu to read these entries, the knowledge that Yoochun once loved another man that went by the same name as him. Junsu took the picture frame and removed the picture. He turned to look at the back of it and saw Yoochun ♥ Junsu’ written there. A tear fell onto the photo leaving behind a tiny dark spot. The only conclusion Junsu came to was that Yoochun loved his dad and t hurt him that Yoochun was using as a substitute.
He returned the journal and the photo to their rightful place before leaving Yoochun’s study. He knew he should go look for Yoochun elsewhere but he was now he haunted by the possibilities that Yoochun was not who he had let him to believe. But a smile unknowingly made its way to the corner of his lips when he remembered Yoochun’s innocent entries when he was still a teenager.
Yoochun’s newer entries had been from when he became his guardian. In these entries he saw the difference in his writing style and seemed to reflect Yoochun’s loneliness and dark thoughts. Junsu cannot help but wondered how people like Yoochun from the lost generation used to live as he walked to the gathering room hoping to warm himself around the hologram fire. Just as he arrived outside the room he recognized both Yoochun’s and Jaejoong’s voices and they seemed to be having a heated argument.
“How could you lie to me? I trusted you so much Jaejoong, both as a friend and as a leader.”
“Yoochun it was all for your own good. I didn’t know what really happened but I knew that it was during the attack that Junsu disappeared.”
A moment of silence followed before Yoochun uttered, “But you could have still told me. You don’t know what happened. My life is messed up now, because of… of…” Yoochun could not bring himself to continue and share this part of his past, not with Jaejoong or anyone else. All these while Junsu continued to listen as he hid himself well in case Yoochun would come out anytime.
“Then tell me what happened to Junsu that day? You were with my brother.”
“Jaejoong, Junsu didn’t die that day. By bringing us here once again where everything started is the biggest mistake you ever made,” cried Yoochun sounding disappointed and defeated.
“This planet might not let us leave this time.”
“Yoochun, what do you mean?” Jaejoong asked but Yoochun was already leaving the room.
Junsu heard Yoochun’s footsteps approaching and instinctively folded himself into a tight ball.
When he heard the both of them had left the room Junsu came out of his hiding place checking the corridors before he too left silently. The only thing he could think about was how to find this ‘Junsu’ person and if he was actually staying on this ship.
That night Junsu’s dream was filled with symbols, the moon and sun, of planet and mankind as well as life and death. None of it made any sense to him as he jolted awake covered in cold sweat. The image of Yoochun’s anguished face lingered his mind especially the moment when Yoochun shouted his name while crawling on the ground leaving blood trails behind.
On the next morning everything was the same where Changmin wolfed down his meals while Jaejoong and Yunho were rubbing their feet against each other under the table. Kibum was scribbling furiously in his notebook and Hankyung was busy cajoling a sulking Heechul.
Junsu searched among the crew members but Yoochun was nowhere in sight. Maybe it was a good thing that he was not here in the dining room because Junsu did not know whether he would be able look at Yoochun in the eyes. Junsu finished his breakfast before preparing for the excursion with the rest of the members.
It was only then when he saw Yoochun who was standing nearby with a fag in his mouth as he seemed to be painfully breathing. Junsu chose to ignore him and dived into MR2. The planet they were on has shifted from a desert to now a blue sea with water everywhere except on the beaches. Junsu would not be surprised if a dolphin would appear now but he knew it exist only in the old books just like the sun.
Several days had passed with Yoochun noting the absence of Junsu in his everyday life. There were no complains of him smoking, no squeals in the mornings and most of all he was no longer beside him in bed to comfort him when he had nightmares. On the fifth day Yoochun wanted to confront Junsu and find out if he had done something wrong. Searching for him everywhere and even asking the crew but no one knew his whereabouts. He finally found Junsu in his own study room sitting behind his desk with his journal.
“Who is this Junsu person?” Junsu asked sternly while still reading the journal.
“He..” Yoochun trailed off trying to search for an explanation.
“Why did you raise me? You gave me hope and dreams but now you’re taking it all away from me?” cried Junsu.
“I’m… it’s not what you think Junsu.”
“Then explain to me. Tell me about my parents and maybe then I’ll forgive you.” Love had made Junsu weak and forgiving. He knew that he was not like himself now but he just wanted Yoochun to give him some answers so that his love would not be wasted.
“Junsu was my best friend,” Yoochun stated as he decided to share this painful memories of his.
“I just remembered this a few days ago when they fished me out of the pond.” He was about to take a seat on the sofa but then decided to make himself a martini at the mini-bar Yoochun.
“As I said, Junsu was my best friend since childhood though the age gap between us was ten years. He was also Jaejoong’s older brother.” Yoochun stared out the window where it was dark as the sun has longed become invisible.
“I met him through Jaejoong when we were going on our first excursion and Junsu was our guardian. Back then I simply thought of him as an older brother whom I admired.”
Silence.
“Who am I kidding? I admired him a lot. He took care of us both when I moved in with Jaejoong. Back then Siwon was still alive. And Junsu had a boyfriend called Brian, he didn’t live with us and was usually away too.”
Yoochun was now immersed in the past as he brought the triangular glass to his lips. He did not drink but only letting the alcohol wet his lips. “When I got older I found out Junsu was abused and I confronted Brian. Guess what happened to me?”
Junsu held his breath as he waited for Yoochun to continue. This was not what he had in mind and he could not think of any answer to Yoochun’s question. Deep down he hoped that Yoochun had beaten this Brian into a pulp.
“He broke four of my ribs and knocked out two of my teeth. But it was all worth it because that was the last time he came near Junsu. You see our love was no fairy tale and it didn’t end as one either.“ Yoochun stopped as he gulped down the content of his glass.
“I can still remember it clearly, these memories stayed with me. It was on my twentieth birthday and just like now, we were on a ship with two teams, blue and red. Junsu insisted for me to bring a camera though I thought he was being silly. Why use a camera when there’s more developed gadget to use.” Yoochun chuckled bitterly and his hands were shaking so he placed the glass down on a small cup board.
“All the crew members were still singing the birthday song for me when a blast hit our ship. It was a shockwave that threw the ship off balance and chaos ensued. The electricity went off and many of us lost consciousness.” Yoochun’s eyes became unfocused as he vividly recalled the scene.
“Those who were conscious ran towards the fire exit. They planned on using the mini pilot ships to escape. But right then a second attack came and our ship was shaken once again. I think from that second blast the ship had been broken into two. By then I couldn’t see where Junsu was and could only kept screaming his name.” Yoochun paused trying to calm himself and silently asking for permission to stop for the day.
“That was all that I can remember before my accident. Junsu, please can we continue this another day? I’ll tell you everything else but please let me stop for now. I can’t continue. I just can’t.” Yoochun pleaded as he hid his face on the cushions hoping Junsu would allow him to rest. Sniffles were heard when Yoochun felt a warm body coming to rest behind him
“I’ll forgive you for now. But Yoochun there is something I wanted to tell you. Just listen to me and don’t interrupt.” Junsu breathed in deeply gathering courage before he began to speak again.
“I’m not sure how Junsu is related to me whether he was my dad or not. But one thing I’m sure is my love for you. Yoochun…Chunnie, I love you.”
After his confession Junsu just wanted to hide somewhere and never show his face to Yoochun anymore. Junsu did not have the courage nor know what else to say. As for Yoochun he was still burying his face in the cushions not sure if he had heard it right or not. He shifted and turned around with eyes red and teary. His eyes were wide open as big as owls with an invisible question mark above his head.
“You love me?”
Junsu nodded as he stared at his hands, which had suddenly seemed much more interesting.
“Me too.”
The hot breath on Junsu’s neck sent shivers down his spine. Yoochun’s lips left butterfly kisses on his nose, his head, his cheeks before finally coming to a stop at his mouth. Junsu’s eyes widen and he felt like his heart had stopped when their lips brushed against each other sharing a soft and chaste kiss. Junsu mewled when Yoochun’s hands went under his shirt to caress his skin. He arched his back feeling like every part of his body was on fire.
No doubt the bulge in his pants was as hard as rock so Yoochun undressed Junsu skillfully. Before he even noticed Yoochun was crouched in front of his boxers using his teeth to nip the delicate skin there. Yoochun continued to tease Junsu until he finally pulled Yoochun’s hair before giving Yoochun’s head a push.
“Baby, we’re not skin to skin yet,“ teased Yoochun. He then used his teeth to pull at the waistband before letting it go with a smacking sound.
“M..ah.” Junsu bit his arm to stifle his moans. It seemed like fire was engulfing his whole body travelling to every part of his limbs and gathered in his abdomen. His mind was blurry but the exquisite pleasure he was feeling made him yelled out Yoochun’s name. The only name he knew.
At this moment Yoochun felt like he was suspended in the past and the present. Junsu’s writhing form beneath him begging for more but he could not bring himself to taint his pureness again. He blamed himself for what happened in the past and did not want to repeat the same mistake but this now was too tempting.
Yoochun gave in and thrust into Junsu. Feeling Junsu’s hot and wet entrance swallowin him only urged him to thrust harder and faster.
Maybe there was a chance to escape after all.
***
Yoochun talked with Jaejoong about leaving earlier without mentioning anything about why or his brother. He wanted to be on the safe side and not for history to repeat itself.
After that day he also treasured Junsu even more than he did in the past. Every morning he would serve Junsu breakfast in bed, which he prepared himself pouring all his love into it. They were a loving couple and truly enjoyed every moment with each other.
Junsu had also stopped asking questions, deciding instead to just trust Yoochun. Sometimes he would still get the urge to ask about the past but he always managed to refrain from doing so. In his mind he knew Yoochun was more important and having him was all that he needed.
Like always they were enjoying their breakfast in Yoochun’s sleeping chamber. The atmosphere was tranquil and seemed like nothing could bother them. Just at that moment Jaejoong called for Yoochun to attend a meeting along with Changmin and Yunho.
Junsu had to try real hard in stopping himself from interrupting them to demand knowing what they were talking about. He waited for Yoochun to return which did not take long, whom had a bright smile on his face.
“We’re leaving tomorrow, Susu.” He grabbed Junsu by his waist and twirled around with him until Junsu complained about getting nauseous.
“Why are we leaving so suddenly?” Junsu asked curiously.
“Because it’s not safe here.”
Junsu looked at him waiting to hear the reason why but Yoochun remained silent with a guilty pout on his lips.
“I promise I’ll tell you why once we leave. I feel like if I talk about it now, it just might appear,” Yoochun explain trying to appease Junsu. The latter had no choice but to nod in acceptance.
He was still pouting and this was clearly a temptation for Yoochun. “You know that when you do that, I might not be able to contain myself.”
“Haha, you’re not deprived. We just spend all of last night doing it.” Junsu could not believe that Yoochun still had any energy or lust left in him at the moment.
But he was wrong when he felt his butt getting harassed causing him to jump out of Yoochun’s warm, embrace to the comfy sofa. Before he could get farther away Yoochun pushed him onto the bed and ravaged his mouth like he was a bee in need of the sweetest honey.
Junsu felt like he was being blown away when he felt Yoochun entered him. Yoochun’s organ was growing as hard as stone in his entrance grow hard everytime he pushed in. Then Yoochun flipped Junsu over onto his stomach and kept his legs splayed open in a V shape with one of his hands.
Without wasting another second Yoochun resumed thrusting in and out of Junsu with all his might while his mouth latched onto Junsu’s milky-white skin. No doubt he wanted to leave a mark on Junsu marking him as his.
Junsu whimpered when Yoochun found his sweet spot and continually aiming for it. He knew he was going to go over the edge when the only things he could see were stars. They let themselves got lost in ecstasy, coming hard together as they shouted out each others’ names.
***
It was late at night with another twelve hours before they would depart. Junsu was using Yoochun’s arm as a pillow not that he would complain. They talked about all kinds of stuff trying to find out everything about each other. Junsu spoke honestly from stuffs about school to his secret love for Yoochun.
All the while Yoochun listened to him patiently. When it was Yoochun’s turn to talk it was already morning. The Blue Moon was now darker than ever since the sun was too far away from it. Junsu listened attentively as Yoochun stumbled over his words not knowing where or how to start.
“I actually thought Junsu had left me. Since after I confessed that morning he had remained absent minded all day. Even during the celebration he still refused to look me in the eye.”
Junsu felt protective of Yoochun when he heard this, “What he missed he can’t get now.”
Yoochun clasped his head and kiss him before continuing, “When the light cut off and everything went black, I couldn’t find Junsu anywhere. I looked everywhere but finally when I went back to the gathering room, I saw a blue almost silver glow. It had no shape at all yet it managed to carry Junsu in its arms.” Yoochun sighed rubbing his face with his hands.
“I call it the Ghost,” whispered Yoochun. The second Yoochun uttered that name, Junsu felt something clicked inside him. It seemed like a light was being extinguished inside Junsu and he felt a sense of foreboding.
Without warning both Yoochun and Junsu felt the ship shook violently. No doubt everyone else on the ship felt it too, as the movement was huge signaling danger. Junsu rushed towards the windows to look outside but it was pitch black outside.
Yoochun pulled Junsu away from the windows and they ran out to the hall. As they searched for the other members in the dark Yoochun was reminded him of the past time when something similar to this had happened.
They felt another wave of attacks and the ship was overturned causing their entwined hands to part. They were thrown about and both hit their heads pretty hard and the last thing they saw before fainting was the red sirens.
When Yoochun regained consciousness his head was throbbing and blood was dripping down his forehead. He registered that Junsu was nowhere in sight as he fumbled in the dark for Junsu’s smaller pair of hands that he was grasping before fainting. He was met with only air.
“Junsu!” He shouted again and again. Guilt was consuming him as he blamed himself for everything that had happened. If he was just stronger and did not say the forbidden name then maybe Junsu would still be beside him.
But there was no time for him to wallow in self pity. His main priority was to find Junsu. He remembered the red sirens flashing in rhythm with his crazily beating heart. After running around for god knows how long he saw a silver light in the distance.
It was depressing as he walked towards it knowing that he was going down the same road, facing the same fate but had no power to prevent it from happening. There was no turning back now but what was waiting for him at the end of the hall.
“Junsu,” he screamed on top of his lungs. His throat ached like sandpaper rubbing on the inside. Junsu was indeed at the end of the hall along with the Ghost. But this time it had taken on a form of a gorilla. It was believed to be the closest to human where they were evolved from them.
Yoochun’s eyes were now crying blood from all the pain and fear of losing the one he loved. The dirt in his fingers from crawling when he fell made him seemed like a savage when he reached out for Junsu. The boy were hanging from the Ghost’s arms like a ragged doll with his hair fallen across his face shielding it from Yoochun’s view.
His small frame made him looked so vulnerable and innocent like pure white snow amidst the silver glow. The urge to dash to him and rescue Junsu was greater than anything else and he charged at the Ghost. However, a blast sent him flying back, hitting the wall with a thud.
The windows were broken as pieces of glasses were lying on the floor leaving jagged edges on the window panes. Nothing was heard other than the billowing curtains and Yoochun’s heavy breathing. No sound was heard from Junsu or the Ghost.
“I left him in your care giving you a second chance. This boy belongs among us. This little one here is our kin.” The Ghost patted Junsu on the head like he was a cat. And a streak of white hair grew among Junsu’s hair.
“Now it’s time for him to come home to us, our little one.” The Ghost now looked like a lioness watching over her son.
“Please don’t take him from me,” Yoochun pleaded used the remaining of his strength to stand up. He then fell back down on his knees, kneeling as he begged, “He’s my everything! I can’t bear to lose him again.”
“It’s time.” At this Junsu shifted in the Ghost’s arms, struggling in those arms. He was about to wake up, his eyes about to open when Yoochun attacked the Ghost again in his last attempt to rescue Junsu.
“It’s futile. Let’s go home, little one.” The Ghost turned its furry back now facing Yoochun’s sprawled body on the floor. Every limb on Yoochun’s body refused to move so he could only lift his head and stare at his star slowly fading away.
“Junsu.” A whisper so quiet but with the wind blowing reached Junsu’s ears.
***
“Daddy! Daddy! Junsu drew this for daddy.” Junsu’s small and chubby hands held out a drawing for his daddy to see.
Yoochun turned away from the pile of papers on his working desk and took the drawing. Fixing his glasses he studied it before asking, “What’s this? Is it Junsu and daddy?”
The adorable Junsu pointed at the drawing and exclaimed, “This is daddy here and this is Junsu.” He sucked on his thumb before he continued, “and we are on the Blue Moon.”
“Daddy will keep this drawing. Now go to sleep. You’ve to attend kindergarten tomorrow. It’s your first day.”
***
The next morning Yoochun urged little Junsu to hurry up, “Did you put your lunchbox into your bag yet?”
Junsu checked his bag and nodded. His blue shorts showed his bruised leg, which he had gotten when he carelessly fell while playing. The little cap on his head shielded his face from the sun since he would easily get sunburn.
Yoochun kissed Junsu on both his cheeks before gently pushing him along to the kindergarten’s entrance. He spotted Jaejoong ahead and approached him with Junsu by his side. “Hey Jaejoong. Take care of my son. “
The other just smirked at him, face full of mischief, I’ll make sure to take care of my big brother.”
Yoochun then left to go to work and bought himself a black coffee with at least ten sugar cubes added with no milk along the way. When he entered his office, the first thing that came into view was Heechul’s flaming red hair. It seemed to outshine everything else in the room.
“I called everyone to gather at your house tonight. Gonna throw a party for Junsu’s first day in kindergarted,” Heechul announced as he placed his feet on the table and let his head fell backwards.
“I met someone, an acquaintance of Jaejoong, ” Heechul said with a childish grin on his face.
Yoochun took his seat and started to work, ignoring Heechul’s presence. Then a knock on the door disturbed Yoochun’s concentration as he looked up.
Heechul’s face glowing as he called out, “Come in.”
When the door opened and a guy entered Yoochun could only gawk at him but he quickly divert his attention back to his work. Heechul flung himself at the tall, lean man and engaged in a French kiss with him not caring that they were in public.
“I’ll be surprising Jaejoong.” With that said Heechul dragged the guy out with him.
Yoochun smiled under his mask before continuing with his work and finally after working ten hours straight he left for home. He arrived at his house fifteen minutes later and could see from the light on his porch that all his friends were already there. The most unmistakable sound was Junsu’s squeaky voice.
Right when he opened the front door Junsu jumped on him, “Welcome home daddy.” His little Junsu was smiling happily at him before hugged him tightly refusing to let go.
Jaejoong and Heechul were already drinking like crazy, both gulping down alcohol without pausing. Though Yoochun did not arrive in time to witness Jaejoong’s shocked face seeing Heechul and Hankyung together.
They drank and chatted about the past and future for quite awhile. Then Yoochun felt a tug on his sleeve as Junsu said, “Daddy I’m sleepy.” He was rubbing his adorably and Yoochun could not help but smile at this cute little alien in front of him.
“Have you brush your teeth?” Yoochun asked as he carried Junsu to his bedroom.
“Junsu did that all by myself today, daddy.”
“Then let’s put you to bed.” Yoochun placed Junsu on the bed and secured the cover around Junsu careful not to leave his arms exposed to the cold.
“Does mommy not love Junsu? Is that why mommy is gone?” Junsu asked innocently.
Yoochun twitched at hearing this question. He had never needed to explain before and it was difficult to face such an innocent face and lie. With a pout on his face, Junsu waited for his daddy to answer him.
Yoochun said the first thing that came to his mind, “A bird came to daddy one day and dropped my adorable Junsu into my arms. That’s why Junsu doesn’t have a mommy.”
A lie.
Junsu thought about it and came to the conclusion that this answer sounded reasonable.
“Then does daddy love Junsu?” It was such an innocent question that it made Yoochun doubt his own intentions of raising this child.
“More than the salt in the sea.”
“Uek. Junsu don’t like salty.” He stuck his tongue out as he said it.
“In this world daddy loves Junsu the most. I will love Junsu for always.”
Outside the room Yoochun’s friends heard his confession and they could only look down sadly on their palms. It seems in the past or the present science and fate has done nothing for Yoochun’s life.
Inside Yoochun moved to kiss Junsu on his head but little Junsu moved suddenly and he ended kissing him on the lips. Yoochun was caught by surprise on the softness of Junsu’s lips and immediatly moved away.
“Goodnight Junsu.” With that said Yoochun got off the bed and left the room
“Goodnight daddy,” Junsu called out.
Junsu touched his lips where his daddy had kissed and he whispered to himself, “Junsu loves daddy too.”
When Yoochun exited the room he saw the sadness on his friends’ faces. No, not only sadness but also guilt for not being able to help in the past or the present. They waited for Yoochun to say something but he did not utter anything.
Jaejoong choose to speak up, “Why don’t you tell him the truth. Even if Junsu’s a child he can still understand the truth. You’re just making your life miserable.”
Changmin could not hold it in anymore too, “I, no, we all saw your face when he called you daddy. It’s like a thorn in your heart.”
Yoochun sipped from his glass of wine, let in stayed in his mouth for awhile to savor the taste. Looking up at them he declared softly, “I’ll wait for him, even if it’s for eternity.”
A/N: Anyone from Spain?
Pairings:Yoochun ♥ Junsu
Rating:NC-17
Author: agnetalovek
Beta: ting5
Genre:Sci-fi, supernatural, romance
Summary:Yoochun and Junsu are aboard the same ship they were on five years ago. This time as a family instead of lovers. One has no memories of the past, except for betrayal. The other one lives in oblivion and hopes to confess to his guardian.
ATTENTION: ANYONE FROM SPAIN?
Yoochun woke up all sweaty and sticky. He had one of his old nightmares, the memories from his childhood that were still haunting him. Now that he was awake, he couldn’t remember precise what he was dreaming about but only that it was about him and his first love.
Having enough of the soft water bed Yoochun got up and dressed himself in grey cardigans, which showed his toned chest and a pair of white jogging pants. The packet of cigarettes on the table seemed so alluring like it was calling for him, begging to be lit and brought to his mouth.
Giving in to the lure, Yoochun went to the smoking area to take a drag. They were prohibited to smoke at any other places on the ship except these designated areas. He could feel the cigarette dangling between his fingers and he wondered if it would leave behind any kind of smell.
But of course it will. Tobacco smelled awful like shit, which was what Junsu told him once when he had gone to smoke and returned smelling so. Yoochun wondered how Junsu would react to this since he had told the younger man that he had quit.
Spoke of the devil, Yoochun saw Junsu walking towards him with a sullen face, a mix of pouting and anger. Thank god for the glass shielding Junsu from seeing Yoochun’s face as only half his body was showing. Not to mention the smoke inside the cabin making it hard for people from outside to see anything inside.
Deep down Yoochun hoped that Junsu would just give up for now and let Yoochun find him afterwards instead. But luck was not on his side because Junsu had used his small fists to bang on the glass while shouting something from the other side. For sure he was really mad now.
There was still a little of the cigarette left but Yoochun decided it was enough. He walked out of the room only to see Junsu pouting at him with both his cheeks puffed out. Yoochun bent closer to him using both his hands to pinch Junsu’s cheeks, which hurt a bit.
Junsu let out a whining sound and rubbed the sting out of his cheeks. “Chunnie, why are you always doing this to me?”
Junsu made such an adorable sight, clad in his mini-shorts and a shirt that was a little too large for him. “It’s because you’re too irresistible. And didn’t I tell you not to call me Chunnie? I know calling me Appa’s impossible but at least called me Yoochun?”
Junsu brushed him off pretending not to hear anything. He clung to Yoochun’s left arm and quickly switched subject. “We’ll be arriving on the Moon in Hostmaty06 solar system soon and I wanted to ask you in enjoying the view with me.”
Junsu slowly led Yoochun to the middle sector’s glass chamber where no one used anymore. It was pitch black inside and he could barely see his own fingers. When Junsu turned on a switch all the pallets were lifted and he could see a shining globe.
It was round and shiny that enabled Yoochun to see his own reflection on the window. Just for a moment he thought he saw something or rather someone moved behind him. It was a young man who had a small frame and dressed in a white robe. His hair was flowing behind him like water and has emerald orbs which were cold and piercing staring back at him.
Yoochun flinched when Junsu’s head came to rest on his shoulder tearing his gaze away from the figure. When Yoochun turned around to see if the person he saw through the window’s reflection was real or not, no one was there. Was it disappointment he felt inside he thought as he chewed on his nails tasting the hints of tobacco left there. It didn’t take long for Junsu to notice this bad habit of his as Junsu slapped his hand away.
“You should stop biting you nail. It’s a bad habit and can affect the youngsters like me. What if I started to eat bugger?” Junsu giggled when he said the last word making Yoochun thought what a child Junsu still was no matter how hard he tried to act mature.
Outside a bluish silver glow lightened up the room they were in and allowed Junsu to study Yoochun’s face intensely. Yoochun’s long, hair was gathered up in a pony tail leaving several tendrils loose that framed his face. There was this yearning sensation burning inside him which wanted to burst and escape. However, even Junsu knew that would be a dangerous bet as love always be.
“When do you think you can tell me about my parents? About my mom and dad?”
Yoochun looked hesitant for a moment as he seemed to be thinking real hard from the frown that decorated his forehead. He sighed and rubbed his eyes tiredly, “How many times do we have to talk about this? I told you when the time is up and when I’m ready.” He tried to smile reassuringly at Junsu who was looking dejected.
“There is not much to tell anyway. I promise that I’ll tell you soon.” With that Yoochun once again faced the windows looking out into the vast Universe. It was big and dark like the pit of hell though scientifically hell has not yet been proven to exist.
Junsu let the door shut behind him as he left the room and escaped to Hyukjae’s chamber. After knocking for more than ten times and still received no answer Junsu walked back to his own room. His shoulders were slumped and his face full of despair. In his room he washed his face trying to clear his mind. While he was wiping his face he bumped into his desk stubbed his toes pretty hard. Letting out a wince as he hopped up and down he fell onto the bed and ended up hugging himself.
Somehow Junsu fell asleep and woke up some time later as he sensed the presence of someone beside him. With his eyes still closed he could feel a pair of arms wrapped around him and the smell tobacco wafted into his nose. Groggily Junsu smiled and snuggled closer to the warmth Yoochun emanated feeling secure. He inhaled deeply savoring the tobacco smell which not many people would be doing.
“We’ve landed. Jaejoong and Leeteuk scolded me for your bad temperament. I’m here now as a white knight to ask for you to come with me and live happily ever after in our extravagant white castle.”
“You make me feel like a woman Chunnie.” Junsu only wanted to tease him and his hormones were acting up making him said such stupid words. Blushing deeply Junsu ducked his head under the covers and only came out when he felt Yoochun leaving the bed to let him change.
Yoochun stood waiting behind the door as Junsu changed into something more comfortable most likely thick, layered clothes. He disliked the tight suits especially the white ones which smelled like strawberries. Jaejoong, their team leader loved strawberries and enjoyed spraying all of their suits with strawberry flavored spray.
When Junsu came out he was a little taken aback to find Yoochun waiting for him. Letting out a hiss he scolded, “You shouldn’t do that. I’ll die from a heart attack if you keep frightening me like that.”
“It’s not my intentions Junsu because I always wanted you to live for 100 years.” And maybe even outlive me this time his last thought seemed to come out of nowhere.
They proceeded to the dock room and behind it was the MR2 substance pool. There Junsu dove in to cover his body with the gel-like liquid before he can then wear the Blancas suit. He gagged at the strong strawberry smell and cursed. At this time Changmin was waiting for him on the other side of the pool and caught a few curses he was mumbling
“Hey Junsu, be careful that Yunho doesn’t hear you or you'll be in deep shit.”
“Why are you not scolding me? Is threesome that much fun?”
Changmin chuckled at this and didn’t retort because the group was already gathering and the blue team leader, Leeteuk was there. Leeteuk explained their mission which was on a foreign Moon and warned them of the possibilities of aliens and sudden attacks from space. They were most vulnerable when they are outside the boundaries of their ship.
Yoochun warned Junsu to stay close to him at all times once they leave the ship. Junsu was ready to protest that he was already a grown-up responsible for himself whether Yoochun liked it or not. But of course he did not say this out loud because it might hurt Yoochun’s feelings and he was not ready to go against Yoochun yet.
When they were outside Yoochun released the belt connecting Junsu to him and told the boy to look around for a bit on his own. Junsu was glad to finally having a little freedom. He strolled down the endless rocks and Sahara. Sometimes he would come across some strange crops and trees that have what looked like paintings inscribed on them.
Junsu took samples of things that he thought were interesting and packed them into small containers filled with dung and sand. Not knowing how much time has passed Junsu continued to wander until Changmin called for him to return. Junsu had to locate where he was with the GPS system. When he arrived at the gathering spot Yoochun was nowhere to be found even Jaejoong could not locate him
No one was especially worried since they all knew Yoochun’s working habit where he would forget about everything until his work was done. Junsu was the only one who had a bad feeling but he let himself be convinced by Leeteuk that Yoochun was having a good time down in the large pond. And just as predicted Yoochun returned after Jaejoong had just finished with his cooking and everyone was cleaning up.
Yoochun was shivering with lips that had turned blue and he was on the verge of collapsing. JE was quickly brought back to the ship and Junsu immediately followed closely behind. Yoochun seemed to be in bad shape and all Junsu could do was hovered worriedly at the door of the medical room. Jaejoong took off Yoochun’s Blancas while Yunho prepared warm soup and hot tea.
When Jaejoong called him in to tell him that Yoochun’s going to be fine Junsu felt like he could finally breathe again. Yoochun’s condition was not grave and he suffered no injuries judging from his MRI. Junsu was the one shaking like he was the one exposed to the cold instead. Seeing this Jaejoong wanted to move Junsu back to his room but the boy refused to let go of Yoochun’s hand. No matter how hard he pulled their hands remained entwined.
“Jaejoong, just let Junsu rest here for tonight,” Changmin said while smiling mischievously. He had his face turned towards the window so that Jaejoong would not notice this and questioned him.
But none of them noticed the blood squeezed black tulip, which was now crying in YooSu’s hands.
***
Junsu woke up to find Yoochun’s bed empty. He looked around but found no traces of Yoochun. Getting worried he climbed out of the sheets slipping his feet into the slippers. His arm was numb which meant that Yoochun had just left not too long ago. He went around searching for him and the first place he stopped by was the smoking room.
To his dismay Yoochun was not in the smoking room, and so he went to the next destination in his mind, Yoochun’s study. When he opened the door he heard a cracking sound and thought he broke something. Looking around he saw that there was no one was inside and he cannot help but wonder again how did Yoochun attained all those books filling shelves after shelves..
They were all marked from 1995 onwards and stopped at 3016. Junsu remembered the elders spoke of it as the doomsday, when the earth came to its end and for humanity the weak ones were killed by an epidemic or a natural disaster. Only the strong ones were left and they made used of what was left on Earth to escape to space.
Junsu’s hands came in contact with the books and the holograms disappeared as a red light came on and a beeping was heard signaling there was an intruder. Junsu quickly entered the password to Yoochun’s study which the others did not know he knew. With the alarm off Junsu took his time looking around feeling relaxed and comfortable.
The oriental pattered cushions from the red leather couches and dirty clothing were thrown around the room and not to mention the mess Yoochun had made with all his files. It was truly a wonder how Yoochun managed to find anything at all in this mess. The black chair behind the desk suddenly seemed compelling to Junsu luring him there to experience what Yoochun had felt when he sat there. There were pictures of them on Yoochun’s desk taken when they visited other planets.
Looking at them memories came flooding back to Junsu like gushing water from a stream. The happy times when things weren’t this complicated, when he could still sort out his feelings comprehending the different love between family and lovers. His gaze landed on one of the photos which he found odd in some sense because he cannot remember ever posing for such a shot. The blue background looked real and the image of him was smiling widely with eyes twinkling. He looked happy and seemed to be experiencing the best time of his life.
The more Junsu studied the photo the odder he found it to be. Yoochun looked incredibly gallant in the photo with a confident smile on his face. Another thing that Junsu observed was that the image of him the picture was taller than Yoochun. Feeling strange Junsu decided to search the desk drawers hoping to find some clues that may explained about the guy that looked like him in the photo.
He fumbled around and found a drawer that was locked. He tried using the same password for the alarm and luckily the drawer opened. Inside he saw a red journal, which most likely belonged to Yoochun. Carefully he took it out placing it on the desk hesitating whether he should read it or to just leave it untouched. Against his better judgment Junsu went ahead and flipped it open and started to read.
Year: 6745
Date: January 2nd
Today I met him again or I should say the replicate of HIM. He was sedated as the doctor claimed that the electronic waves were too much for him to handle. His sleeping features just looked so much like him.
I’m afraid to say his name as it hurt knowing that he is really gone. I still blame myself for his departure and I cannot seem to think clearly. Jaejoong said it was because I damaged my brain. Well, as much as I’d love to believe him but his actions are making me doubtful.
Junsu flipped several pages back to the older entries.
Year: 6743
Date: May 21st
Junsu asked me to go shopping with him today. He even bought me a pair of cross earrings. He kept one of them and gave me the other one. I was so happy when he hugged me today and kissed me on my cheeks. But it was rather disappointing when we met Jaejoong and his boyfriend, Siwon. No matter how many glares I threw at Jaejoong, he just wouldn’t budge and continued to stay until I cannot take it and left.
Maybe I should confess to Junsu?
It was painful for Junsu to read these entries, the knowledge that Yoochun once loved another man that went by the same name as him. Junsu took the picture frame and removed the picture. He turned to look at the back of it and saw Yoochun ♥ Junsu’ written there. A tear fell onto the photo leaving behind a tiny dark spot. The only conclusion Junsu came to was that Yoochun loved his dad and t hurt him that Yoochun was using as a substitute.
He returned the journal and the photo to their rightful place before leaving Yoochun’s study. He knew he should go look for Yoochun elsewhere but he was now he haunted by the possibilities that Yoochun was not who he had let him to believe. But a smile unknowingly made its way to the corner of his lips when he remembered Yoochun’s innocent entries when he was still a teenager.
Yoochun’s newer entries had been from when he became his guardian. In these entries he saw the difference in his writing style and seemed to reflect Yoochun’s loneliness and dark thoughts. Junsu cannot help but wondered how people like Yoochun from the lost generation used to live as he walked to the gathering room hoping to warm himself around the hologram fire. Just as he arrived outside the room he recognized both Yoochun’s and Jaejoong’s voices and they seemed to be having a heated argument.
“How could you lie to me? I trusted you so much Jaejoong, both as a friend and as a leader.”
“Yoochun it was all for your own good. I didn’t know what really happened but I knew that it was during the attack that Junsu disappeared.”
A moment of silence followed before Yoochun uttered, “But you could have still told me. You don’t know what happened. My life is messed up now, because of… of…” Yoochun could not bring himself to continue and share this part of his past, not with Jaejoong or anyone else. All these while Junsu continued to listen as he hid himself well in case Yoochun would come out anytime.
“Then tell me what happened to Junsu that day? You were with my brother.”
“Jaejoong, Junsu didn’t die that day. By bringing us here once again where everything started is the biggest mistake you ever made,” cried Yoochun sounding disappointed and defeated.
“This planet might not let us leave this time.”
“Yoochun, what do you mean?” Jaejoong asked but Yoochun was already leaving the room.
Junsu heard Yoochun’s footsteps approaching and instinctively folded himself into a tight ball.
When he heard the both of them had left the room Junsu came out of his hiding place checking the corridors before he too left silently. The only thing he could think about was how to find this ‘Junsu’ person and if he was actually staying on this ship.
That night Junsu’s dream was filled with symbols, the moon and sun, of planet and mankind as well as life and death. None of it made any sense to him as he jolted awake covered in cold sweat. The image of Yoochun’s anguished face lingered his mind especially the moment when Yoochun shouted his name while crawling on the ground leaving blood trails behind.
On the next morning everything was the same where Changmin wolfed down his meals while Jaejoong and Yunho were rubbing their feet against each other under the table. Kibum was scribbling furiously in his notebook and Hankyung was busy cajoling a sulking Heechul.
Junsu searched among the crew members but Yoochun was nowhere in sight. Maybe it was a good thing that he was not here in the dining room because Junsu did not know whether he would be able look at Yoochun in the eyes. Junsu finished his breakfast before preparing for the excursion with the rest of the members.
It was only then when he saw Yoochun who was standing nearby with a fag in his mouth as he seemed to be painfully breathing. Junsu chose to ignore him and dived into MR2. The planet they were on has shifted from a desert to now a blue sea with water everywhere except on the beaches. Junsu would not be surprised if a dolphin would appear now but he knew it exist only in the old books just like the sun.
Several days had passed with Yoochun noting the absence of Junsu in his everyday life. There were no complains of him smoking, no squeals in the mornings and most of all he was no longer beside him in bed to comfort him when he had nightmares. On the fifth day Yoochun wanted to confront Junsu and find out if he had done something wrong. Searching for him everywhere and even asking the crew but no one knew his whereabouts. He finally found Junsu in his own study room sitting behind his desk with his journal.
“Who is this Junsu person?” Junsu asked sternly while still reading the journal.
“He..” Yoochun trailed off trying to search for an explanation.
“Why did you raise me? You gave me hope and dreams but now you’re taking it all away from me?” cried Junsu.
“I’m… it’s not what you think Junsu.”
“Then explain to me. Tell me about my parents and maybe then I’ll forgive you.” Love had made Junsu weak and forgiving. He knew that he was not like himself now but he just wanted Yoochun to give him some answers so that his love would not be wasted.
“Junsu was my best friend,” Yoochun stated as he decided to share this painful memories of his.
“I just remembered this a few days ago when they fished me out of the pond.” He was about to take a seat on the sofa but then decided to make himself a martini at the mini-bar Yoochun.
“As I said, Junsu was my best friend since childhood though the age gap between us was ten years. He was also Jaejoong’s older brother.” Yoochun stared out the window where it was dark as the sun has longed become invisible.
“I met him through Jaejoong when we were going on our first excursion and Junsu was our guardian. Back then I simply thought of him as an older brother whom I admired.”
Silence.
“Who am I kidding? I admired him a lot. He took care of us both when I moved in with Jaejoong. Back then Siwon was still alive. And Junsu had a boyfriend called Brian, he didn’t live with us and was usually away too.”
Yoochun was now immersed in the past as he brought the triangular glass to his lips. He did not drink but only letting the alcohol wet his lips. “When I got older I found out Junsu was abused and I confronted Brian. Guess what happened to me?”
Junsu held his breath as he waited for Yoochun to continue. This was not what he had in mind and he could not think of any answer to Yoochun’s question. Deep down he hoped that Yoochun had beaten this Brian into a pulp.
“He broke four of my ribs and knocked out two of my teeth. But it was all worth it because that was the last time he came near Junsu. You see our love was no fairy tale and it didn’t end as one either.“ Yoochun stopped as he gulped down the content of his glass.
“I can still remember it clearly, these memories stayed with me. It was on my twentieth birthday and just like now, we were on a ship with two teams, blue and red. Junsu insisted for me to bring a camera though I thought he was being silly. Why use a camera when there’s more developed gadget to use.” Yoochun chuckled bitterly and his hands were shaking so he placed the glass down on a small cup board.
“All the crew members were still singing the birthday song for me when a blast hit our ship. It was a shockwave that threw the ship off balance and chaos ensued. The electricity went off and many of us lost consciousness.” Yoochun’s eyes became unfocused as he vividly recalled the scene.
“Those who were conscious ran towards the fire exit. They planned on using the mini pilot ships to escape. But right then a second attack came and our ship was shaken once again. I think from that second blast the ship had been broken into two. By then I couldn’t see where Junsu was and could only kept screaming his name.” Yoochun paused trying to calm himself and silently asking for permission to stop for the day.
“That was all that I can remember before my accident. Junsu, please can we continue this another day? I’ll tell you everything else but please let me stop for now. I can’t continue. I just can’t.” Yoochun pleaded as he hid his face on the cushions hoping Junsu would allow him to rest. Sniffles were heard when Yoochun felt a warm body coming to rest behind him
“I’ll forgive you for now. But Yoochun there is something I wanted to tell you. Just listen to me and don’t interrupt.” Junsu breathed in deeply gathering courage before he began to speak again.
“I’m not sure how Junsu is related to me whether he was my dad or not. But one thing I’m sure is my love for you. Yoochun…Chunnie, I love you.”
After his confession Junsu just wanted to hide somewhere and never show his face to Yoochun anymore. Junsu did not have the courage nor know what else to say. As for Yoochun he was still burying his face in the cushions not sure if he had heard it right or not. He shifted and turned around with eyes red and teary. His eyes were wide open as big as owls with an invisible question mark above his head.
“You love me?”
Junsu nodded as he stared at his hands, which had suddenly seemed much more interesting.
“Me too.”
The hot breath on Junsu’s neck sent shivers down his spine. Yoochun’s lips left butterfly kisses on his nose, his head, his cheeks before finally coming to a stop at his mouth. Junsu’s eyes widen and he felt like his heart had stopped when their lips brushed against each other sharing a soft and chaste kiss. Junsu mewled when Yoochun’s hands went under his shirt to caress his skin. He arched his back feeling like every part of his body was on fire.
No doubt the bulge in his pants was as hard as rock so Yoochun undressed Junsu skillfully. Before he even noticed Yoochun was crouched in front of his boxers using his teeth to nip the delicate skin there. Yoochun continued to tease Junsu until he finally pulled Yoochun’s hair before giving Yoochun’s head a push.
“Baby, we’re not skin to skin yet,“ teased Yoochun. He then used his teeth to pull at the waistband before letting it go with a smacking sound.
“M..ah.” Junsu bit his arm to stifle his moans. It seemed like fire was engulfing his whole body travelling to every part of his limbs and gathered in his abdomen. His mind was blurry but the exquisite pleasure he was feeling made him yelled out Yoochun’s name. The only name he knew.
At this moment Yoochun felt like he was suspended in the past and the present. Junsu’s writhing form beneath him begging for more but he could not bring himself to taint his pureness again. He blamed himself for what happened in the past and did not want to repeat the same mistake but this now was too tempting.
Yoochun gave in and thrust into Junsu. Feeling Junsu’s hot and wet entrance swallowin him only urged him to thrust harder and faster.
Maybe there was a chance to escape after all.
***
Yoochun talked with Jaejoong about leaving earlier without mentioning anything about why or his brother. He wanted to be on the safe side and not for history to repeat itself.
After that day he also treasured Junsu even more than he did in the past. Every morning he would serve Junsu breakfast in bed, which he prepared himself pouring all his love into it. They were a loving couple and truly enjoyed every moment with each other.
Junsu had also stopped asking questions, deciding instead to just trust Yoochun. Sometimes he would still get the urge to ask about the past but he always managed to refrain from doing so. In his mind he knew Yoochun was more important and having him was all that he needed.
Like always they were enjoying their breakfast in Yoochun’s sleeping chamber. The atmosphere was tranquil and seemed like nothing could bother them. Just at that moment Jaejoong called for Yoochun to attend a meeting along with Changmin and Yunho.
Junsu had to try real hard in stopping himself from interrupting them to demand knowing what they were talking about. He waited for Yoochun to return which did not take long, whom had a bright smile on his face.
“We’re leaving tomorrow, Susu.” He grabbed Junsu by his waist and twirled around with him until Junsu complained about getting nauseous.
“Why are we leaving so suddenly?” Junsu asked curiously.
“Because it’s not safe here.”
Junsu looked at him waiting to hear the reason why but Yoochun remained silent with a guilty pout on his lips.
“I promise I’ll tell you why once we leave. I feel like if I talk about it now, it just might appear,” Yoochun explain trying to appease Junsu. The latter had no choice but to nod in acceptance.
He was still pouting and this was clearly a temptation for Yoochun. “You know that when you do that, I might not be able to contain myself.”
“Haha, you’re not deprived. We just spend all of last night doing it.” Junsu could not believe that Yoochun still had any energy or lust left in him at the moment.
But he was wrong when he felt his butt getting harassed causing him to jump out of Yoochun’s warm, embrace to the comfy sofa. Before he could get farther away Yoochun pushed him onto the bed and ravaged his mouth like he was a bee in need of the sweetest honey.
Junsu felt like he was being blown away when he felt Yoochun entered him. Yoochun’s organ was growing as hard as stone in his entrance grow hard everytime he pushed in. Then Yoochun flipped Junsu over onto his stomach and kept his legs splayed open in a V shape with one of his hands.
Without wasting another second Yoochun resumed thrusting in and out of Junsu with all his might while his mouth latched onto Junsu’s milky-white skin. No doubt he wanted to leave a mark on Junsu marking him as his.
Junsu whimpered when Yoochun found his sweet spot and continually aiming for it. He knew he was going to go over the edge when the only things he could see were stars. They let themselves got lost in ecstasy, coming hard together as they shouted out each others’ names.
***
It was late at night with another twelve hours before they would depart. Junsu was using Yoochun’s arm as a pillow not that he would complain. They talked about all kinds of stuff trying to find out everything about each other. Junsu spoke honestly from stuffs about school to his secret love for Yoochun.
All the while Yoochun listened to him patiently. When it was Yoochun’s turn to talk it was already morning. The Blue Moon was now darker than ever since the sun was too far away from it. Junsu listened attentively as Yoochun stumbled over his words not knowing where or how to start.
“I actually thought Junsu had left me. Since after I confessed that morning he had remained absent minded all day. Even during the celebration he still refused to look me in the eye.”
Junsu felt protective of Yoochun when he heard this, “What he missed he can’t get now.”
Yoochun clasped his head and kiss him before continuing, “When the light cut off and everything went black, I couldn’t find Junsu anywhere. I looked everywhere but finally when I went back to the gathering room, I saw a blue almost silver glow. It had no shape at all yet it managed to carry Junsu in its arms.” Yoochun sighed rubbing his face with his hands.
“I call it the Ghost,” whispered Yoochun. The second Yoochun uttered that name, Junsu felt something clicked inside him. It seemed like a light was being extinguished inside Junsu and he felt a sense of foreboding.
Without warning both Yoochun and Junsu felt the ship shook violently. No doubt everyone else on the ship felt it too, as the movement was huge signaling danger. Junsu rushed towards the windows to look outside but it was pitch black outside.
Yoochun pulled Junsu away from the windows and they ran out to the hall. As they searched for the other members in the dark Yoochun was reminded him of the past time when something similar to this had happened.
They felt another wave of attacks and the ship was overturned causing their entwined hands to part. They were thrown about and both hit their heads pretty hard and the last thing they saw before fainting was the red sirens.
When Yoochun regained consciousness his head was throbbing and blood was dripping down his forehead. He registered that Junsu was nowhere in sight as he fumbled in the dark for Junsu’s smaller pair of hands that he was grasping before fainting. He was met with only air.
“Junsu!” He shouted again and again. Guilt was consuming him as he blamed himself for everything that had happened. If he was just stronger and did not say the forbidden name then maybe Junsu would still be beside him.
But there was no time for him to wallow in self pity. His main priority was to find Junsu. He remembered the red sirens flashing in rhythm with his crazily beating heart. After running around for god knows how long he saw a silver light in the distance.
It was depressing as he walked towards it knowing that he was going down the same road, facing the same fate but had no power to prevent it from happening. There was no turning back now but what was waiting for him at the end of the hall.
“Junsu,” he screamed on top of his lungs. His throat ached like sandpaper rubbing on the inside. Junsu was indeed at the end of the hall along with the Ghost. But this time it had taken on a form of a gorilla. It was believed to be the closest to human where they were evolved from them.
Yoochun’s eyes were now crying blood from all the pain and fear of losing the one he loved. The dirt in his fingers from crawling when he fell made him seemed like a savage when he reached out for Junsu. The boy were hanging from the Ghost’s arms like a ragged doll with his hair fallen across his face shielding it from Yoochun’s view.
His small frame made him looked so vulnerable and innocent like pure white snow amidst the silver glow. The urge to dash to him and rescue Junsu was greater than anything else and he charged at the Ghost. However, a blast sent him flying back, hitting the wall with a thud.
The windows were broken as pieces of glasses were lying on the floor leaving jagged edges on the window panes. Nothing was heard other than the billowing curtains and Yoochun’s heavy breathing. No sound was heard from Junsu or the Ghost.
“I left him in your care giving you a second chance. This boy belongs among us. This little one here is our kin.” The Ghost patted Junsu on the head like he was a cat. And a streak of white hair grew among Junsu’s hair.
“Now it’s time for him to come home to us, our little one.” The Ghost now looked like a lioness watching over her son.
“Please don’t take him from me,” Yoochun pleaded used the remaining of his strength to stand up. He then fell back down on his knees, kneeling as he begged, “He’s my everything! I can’t bear to lose him again.”
“It’s time.” At this Junsu shifted in the Ghost’s arms, struggling in those arms. He was about to wake up, his eyes about to open when Yoochun attacked the Ghost again in his last attempt to rescue Junsu.
“It’s futile. Let’s go home, little one.” The Ghost turned its furry back now facing Yoochun’s sprawled body on the floor. Every limb on Yoochun’s body refused to move so he could only lift his head and stare at his star slowly fading away.
“Junsu.” A whisper so quiet but with the wind blowing reached Junsu’s ears.
***
“Daddy! Daddy! Junsu drew this for daddy.” Junsu’s small and chubby hands held out a drawing for his daddy to see.
Yoochun turned away from the pile of papers on his working desk and took the drawing. Fixing his glasses he studied it before asking, “What’s this? Is it Junsu and daddy?”
The adorable Junsu pointed at the drawing and exclaimed, “This is daddy here and this is Junsu.” He sucked on his thumb before he continued, “and we are on the Blue Moon.”
“Daddy will keep this drawing. Now go to sleep. You’ve to attend kindergarten tomorrow. It’s your first day.”
***
The next morning Yoochun urged little Junsu to hurry up, “Did you put your lunchbox into your bag yet?”
Junsu checked his bag and nodded. His blue shorts showed his bruised leg, which he had gotten when he carelessly fell while playing. The little cap on his head shielded his face from the sun since he would easily get sunburn.
Yoochun kissed Junsu on both his cheeks before gently pushing him along to the kindergarten’s entrance. He spotted Jaejoong ahead and approached him with Junsu by his side. “Hey Jaejoong. Take care of my son. “
The other just smirked at him, face full of mischief, I’ll make sure to take care of my big brother.”
Yoochun then left to go to work and bought himself a black coffee with at least ten sugar cubes added with no milk along the way. When he entered his office, the first thing that came into view was Heechul’s flaming red hair. It seemed to outshine everything else in the room.
“I called everyone to gather at your house tonight. Gonna throw a party for Junsu’s first day in kindergarted,” Heechul announced as he placed his feet on the table and let his head fell backwards.
“I met someone, an acquaintance of Jaejoong, ” Heechul said with a childish grin on his face.
Yoochun took his seat and started to work, ignoring Heechul’s presence. Then a knock on the door disturbed Yoochun’s concentration as he looked up.
Heechul’s face glowing as he called out, “Come in.”
When the door opened and a guy entered Yoochun could only gawk at him but he quickly divert his attention back to his work. Heechul flung himself at the tall, lean man and engaged in a French kiss with him not caring that they were in public.
“I’ll be surprising Jaejoong.” With that said Heechul dragged the guy out with him.
Yoochun smiled under his mask before continuing with his work and finally after working ten hours straight he left for home. He arrived at his house fifteen minutes later and could see from the light on his porch that all his friends were already there. The most unmistakable sound was Junsu’s squeaky voice.
Right when he opened the front door Junsu jumped on him, “Welcome home daddy.” His little Junsu was smiling happily at him before hugged him tightly refusing to let go.
Jaejoong and Heechul were already drinking like crazy, both gulping down alcohol without pausing. Though Yoochun did not arrive in time to witness Jaejoong’s shocked face seeing Heechul and Hankyung together.
They drank and chatted about the past and future for quite awhile. Then Yoochun felt a tug on his sleeve as Junsu said, “Daddy I’m sleepy.” He was rubbing his adorably and Yoochun could not help but smile at this cute little alien in front of him.
“Have you brush your teeth?” Yoochun asked as he carried Junsu to his bedroom.
“Junsu did that all by myself today, daddy.”
“Then let’s put you to bed.” Yoochun placed Junsu on the bed and secured the cover around Junsu careful not to leave his arms exposed to the cold.
“Does mommy not love Junsu? Is that why mommy is gone?” Junsu asked innocently.
Yoochun twitched at hearing this question. He had never needed to explain before and it was difficult to face such an innocent face and lie. With a pout on his face, Junsu waited for his daddy to answer him.
Yoochun said the first thing that came to his mind, “A bird came to daddy one day and dropped my adorable Junsu into my arms. That’s why Junsu doesn’t have a mommy.”
A lie.
Junsu thought about it and came to the conclusion that this answer sounded reasonable.
“Then does daddy love Junsu?” It was such an innocent question that it made Yoochun doubt his own intentions of raising this child.
“More than the salt in the sea.”
“Uek. Junsu don’t like salty.” He stuck his tongue out as he said it.
“In this world daddy loves Junsu the most. I will love Junsu for always.”
Outside the room Yoochun’s friends heard his confession and they could only look down sadly on their palms. It seems in the past or the present science and fate has done nothing for Yoochun’s life.
Inside Yoochun moved to kiss Junsu on his head but little Junsu moved suddenly and he ended kissing him on the lips. Yoochun was caught by surprise on the softness of Junsu’s lips and immediatly moved away.
“Goodnight Junsu.” With that said Yoochun got off the bed and left the room
“Goodnight daddy,” Junsu called out.
Junsu touched his lips where his daddy had kissed and he whispered to himself, “Junsu loves daddy too.”
When Yoochun exited the room he saw the sadness on his friends’ faces. No, not only sadness but also guilt for not being able to help in the past or the present. They waited for Yoochun to say something but he did not utter anything.
Jaejoong choose to speak up, “Why don’t you tell him the truth. Even if Junsu’s a child he can still understand the truth. You’re just making your life miserable.”
Changmin could not hold it in anymore too, “I, no, we all saw your face when he called you daddy. It’s like a thorn in your heart.”
Yoochun sipped from his glass of wine, let in stayed in his mouth for awhile to savor the taste. Looking up at them he declared softly, “I’ll wait for him, even if it’s for eternity.”
A/N: Anyone from Spain?