I CAN'T EVEN BLAME ALCOHOL FOR THIS SHIT
I have comments to reply to and masterlists to update, but until then, here's... I don't even know. A waaaay future timestamp for (I am almost ashamed to say) Trevor and Mason. This is pretty much _calex_'s fault. And all those other douchebags who kept asking for Trevor/Mason.
"How was work?" Mason asked when Trevor got home. He was standing just inside the doorway, clearly excited. His purple-grey eyes sparkled and his grey skin was lightly flushed.
"Pretty good," Trevor said, hanging up his coat and depositing most of their mail on the hall table, but keeping the brown package in his hand. "Caught a couple of bad guys. Uncle Pete was happy." He bent down to give Mason a quick kiss. It turned into a longer kiss when Mason carded his fingers through Trevor's hair and wouldn't let him move away, licking into his mouth and making that small, whining noise in the back of his throat that he thought Trevor couldn't hear. Trevor smiled against Mason's lips.
"Someone's feeling affectionate today," he said.
Mason gave him one final lingering kiss and pulled away. "Got a promotion."
"A promotion?" Trevor asked. "How could you get a promotion? You're the director of marketing. There's no more up than you. You're as up as it gets."
Mason smiled and rolled his eyes. "Greg's letting me run the orphanage while he and Luce go on their fourteenth honeymoon."
"Really? What happened to Barnabus?" Trevor asked, following Mason into their kitchen, the package still clutched under his arm. He set it down on the kitchen table. A pot was boiling on the stove, and a delicious aroma filled their kitchen.
"Didn't I tell you?" Mason said, looking over his shoulder as he stirred whatever was bubbling in the pot. "He met someone - man named Mortimer. Went into business with him, doing his books. Some sort of collection service."
"Huh," Trevor said. "So you're in charge until they get back. Those poor damn kids."
"Shut up," Mason said, flicking his spoon at him. Scalding drops landed on Trevor's cheeks and lips with a burning splash, making his skin pop and sizzle.
"Ow," Trevor said mildly.
"Oh!" Mason gasped, dropping the spoon on the stovetop with a clatter. He hurried to Trevor's side and helped him slough off the bubbled bits of newly deadened skin, leaving bright pink patches that slowly greyed to match the rest of Trevor's pallor. "Trev, I'm so sorry! Can I get you some ice? Does it hurt? How bad is it? Should we go to the ghostpital?"
"No, but I think . . ." Trevor said, sitting down gingerly in a chair at the kitchen table. "I think it burned my lipth pretty bad. Thit, it thtings like a bitch."
Mason paused, hovering next to Trevor.
Trevor winced dramatically and looked up at Mason with wide eyes. "In fact, I'm not thure I'll be able to thpeak correctly ever again. I'm afraid ith - ith permanent."
"Oh, you ass," Mason said, straightening up.
"No, theriously," Trevor said. "Thith ith awful! God, ith thooooo embarathing."
"You are the worst thing in my life," Mason said, leaving Trevor and walking back to the stove.
Trevor couldn't hold back his laughter anymore. "Aw, c'mon, Mase. I'm just messing with you."
"You aren't funny," Mason said stiffly, his back to Trevor. "You know how hard it was to get rid of that lisp."
"Thorry," Trevor said. "But it's so cute when you slip up. Especially during sex. Oh, Trevor, yeth, yeth! Thath it! Don't thtop!"
"I don't know why I put up with you," Mason sighed in defeat. "You're clearly a terrible ghoul."
"It's 'cause you love me," Trevor said wisely. "Remember, you took that magazine quiz? 'Are You Hopelessly In Love With a Terrible Ghoul? Six Signs.'"
Mason paused thoughtfully. "No, that can't be it."
Trevor laughed, relaxing back in the chair. He rolled his shoulders, working out some of the tension of the day. He was glad to be home. "Oh yeah, it is. You love me madly. You fell in love with me the first time you saw me."
"No," Mason said again. "I'm sure I'd remember doing something so stupid."
"C'mon," Trevor said. "Love at first sight. Admit it."
"Actually, it was indifference at first sight," Mason said nonchalantly, stirring again. "And then it was annoyance at first meeting. And second, and third -"
"Liar," Trevor said. "You wanted my hot ten-year-old body the minute you met me."
"Trevor, I was six when I met you."
"I know," Trevor said. "Kinky bitch."
Mason sighed and, without turning around, said: "Worst. Thing. In. My life."
Trevor got up from his chair and slunk silently closer until he could wrap one arm around Mason's waist. Mason gave a tiny squeak and nearly dropped his spoon. Trevor pulled their bodies close together, fitting himself against Mason's back. He used his free hand to tug on Mason's dark, perfectly styled hair until Mason sighed again and let his head fall back against Trevor's chest. Trevor leaned down and mouthed warm kisses along Mason's exposed neck.
"You're the best thing in mine," Trevor said softly, brushing a kiss against Mason's temple.
"Ugh," Mason said, craning his neck to get a look at Trevor. "Have you been reading Emma's relationship books again?"
"We-ell," Trevor said slowly, grinning. He began swaying their bodies to an invisible melody. "No. But she did send us a care package." He flicked his eyes to the box sitting on the kitchen table.
"Oh no," Mason said. "Not more sex toys. Doesn't that woman have better things to do than interfere with our sex life?"
"I haven't opened it yet," Trevor admitted. "But the box does smell like that cherry vanilla lube you like."
"You mean you like," Mason said darkly.
"You like it too, you big complainer," Trevor breathed into Mason's ear, chuckling when Mason shuddered. "So - how invested are you in whatever it is you're cooking?"
"Trevor," Mason said sharply. "I am not abandoning this dinner so we can have wild, cherry vanilla flavored sex."
"Not even to celebrate your promotion?" Trevor wheedled, pressing his hips up against Mason, gratified when Mason couldn't help but press back. "Come on, I'll be the naughty orphan and you can be the stern headmaster who teaches me a lesson while still being a surprisingly pushy bottom."
"I'm always the surprisingly pushy bottom," Mason grumbled.
"Mmhm," Trevor agreed, nibbling at Mason's ear. "You are. Is there a problem? Don't you love straddling me with your thighs pressed against my sides, riding my cock hard while I pump up into you, telling me exactly what to do to make you come so good?" He ground against Mason, flicking his nipples through his thin dress shirt and eliciting a startled gasp.
"Well, if I must," Mason said a little breathlessly, trying to sound put upon. He turned the stove off with a flick of a dial. "It's about the only time you listen to me, anyway. Get your ass to the bedroom. Now."
"Yes, thir," Trevor said cheekily and bolted down the hall, but not before grabbing the package from the kitchen table. He'd been lying to Mason. He knew exactly what was in the package.
He had plans for that extra large bottle of lube. And the brushes. And the cherry vanilla body paint. And the video camera.
"How was work?" Mason asked when Trevor got home. He was standing just inside the doorway, clearly excited. His purple-grey eyes sparkled and his grey skin was lightly flushed.
"Pretty good," Trevor said, hanging up his coat and depositing most of their mail on the hall table, but keeping the brown package in his hand. "Caught a couple of bad guys. Uncle Pete was happy." He bent down to give Mason a quick kiss. It turned into a longer kiss when Mason carded his fingers through Trevor's hair and wouldn't let him move away, licking into his mouth and making that small, whining noise in the back of his throat that he thought Trevor couldn't hear. Trevor smiled against Mason's lips.
"Someone's feeling affectionate today," he said.
Mason gave him one final lingering kiss and pulled away. "Got a promotion."
"A promotion?" Trevor asked. "How could you get a promotion? You're the director of marketing. There's no more up than you. You're as up as it gets."
Mason smiled and rolled his eyes. "Greg's letting me run the orphanage while he and Luce go on their fourteenth honeymoon."
"Really? What happened to Barnabus?" Trevor asked, following Mason into their kitchen, the package still clutched under his arm. He set it down on the kitchen table. A pot was boiling on the stove, and a delicious aroma filled their kitchen.
"Didn't I tell you?" Mason said, looking over his shoulder as he stirred whatever was bubbling in the pot. "He met someone - man named Mortimer. Went into business with him, doing his books. Some sort of collection service."
"Huh," Trevor said. "So you're in charge until they get back. Those poor damn kids."
"Shut up," Mason said, flicking his spoon at him. Scalding drops landed on Trevor's cheeks and lips with a burning splash, making his skin pop and sizzle.
"Ow," Trevor said mildly.
"Oh!" Mason gasped, dropping the spoon on the stovetop with a clatter. He hurried to Trevor's side and helped him slough off the bubbled bits of newly deadened skin, leaving bright pink patches that slowly greyed to match the rest of Trevor's pallor. "Trev, I'm so sorry! Can I get you some ice? Does it hurt? How bad is it? Should we go to the ghostpital?"
"No, but I think . . ." Trevor said, sitting down gingerly in a chair at the kitchen table. "I think it burned my lipth pretty bad. Thit, it thtings like a bitch."
Mason paused, hovering next to Trevor.
Trevor winced dramatically and looked up at Mason with wide eyes. "In fact, I'm not thure I'll be able to thpeak correctly ever again. I'm afraid ith - ith permanent."
"Oh, you ass," Mason said, straightening up.
"No, theriously," Trevor said. "Thith ith awful! God, ith thooooo embarathing."
"You are the worst thing in my life," Mason said, leaving Trevor and walking back to the stove.
Trevor couldn't hold back his laughter anymore. "Aw, c'mon, Mase. I'm just messing with you."
"You aren't funny," Mason said stiffly, his back to Trevor. "You know how hard it was to get rid of that lisp."
"Thorry," Trevor said. "But it's so cute when you slip up. Especially during sex. Oh, Trevor, yeth, yeth! Thath it! Don't thtop!"
"I don't know why I put up with you," Mason sighed in defeat. "You're clearly a terrible ghoul."
"It's 'cause you love me," Trevor said wisely. "Remember, you took that magazine quiz? 'Are You Hopelessly In Love With a Terrible Ghoul? Six Signs.'"
Mason paused thoughtfully. "No, that can't be it."
Trevor laughed, relaxing back in the chair. He rolled his shoulders, working out some of the tension of the day. He was glad to be home. "Oh yeah, it is. You love me madly. You fell in love with me the first time you saw me."
"No," Mason said again. "I'm sure I'd remember doing something so stupid."
"C'mon," Trevor said. "Love at first sight. Admit it."
"Actually, it was indifference at first sight," Mason said nonchalantly, stirring again. "And then it was annoyance at first meeting. And second, and third -"
"Liar," Trevor said. "You wanted my hot ten-year-old body the minute you met me."
"Trevor, I was six when I met you."
"I know," Trevor said. "Kinky bitch."
Mason sighed and, without turning around, said: "Worst. Thing. In. My life."
Trevor got up from his chair and slunk silently closer until he could wrap one arm around Mason's waist. Mason gave a tiny squeak and nearly dropped his spoon. Trevor pulled their bodies close together, fitting himself against Mason's back. He used his free hand to tug on Mason's dark, perfectly styled hair until Mason sighed again and let his head fall back against Trevor's chest. Trevor leaned down and mouthed warm kisses along Mason's exposed neck.
"You're the best thing in mine," Trevor said softly, brushing a kiss against Mason's temple.
"Ugh," Mason said, craning his neck to get a look at Trevor. "Have you been reading Emma's relationship books again?"
"We-ell," Trevor said slowly, grinning. He began swaying their bodies to an invisible melody. "No. But she did send us a care package." He flicked his eyes to the box sitting on the kitchen table.
"Oh no," Mason said. "Not more sex toys. Doesn't that woman have better things to do than interfere with our sex life?"
"I haven't opened it yet," Trevor admitted. "But the box does smell like that cherry vanilla lube you like."
"You mean you like," Mason said darkly.
"You like it too, you big complainer," Trevor breathed into Mason's ear, chuckling when Mason shuddered. "So - how invested are you in whatever it is you're cooking?"
"Trevor," Mason said sharply. "I am not abandoning this dinner so we can have wild, cherry vanilla flavored sex."
"Not even to celebrate your promotion?" Trevor wheedled, pressing his hips up against Mason, gratified when Mason couldn't help but press back. "Come on, I'll be the naughty orphan and you can be the stern headmaster who teaches me a lesson while still being a surprisingly pushy bottom."
"I'm always the surprisingly pushy bottom," Mason grumbled.
"Mmhm," Trevor agreed, nibbling at Mason's ear. "You are. Is there a problem? Don't you love straddling me with your thighs pressed against my sides, riding my cock hard while I pump up into you, telling me exactly what to do to make you come so good?" He ground against Mason, flicking his nipples through his thin dress shirt and eliciting a startled gasp.
"Well, if I must," Mason said a little breathlessly, trying to sound put upon. He turned the stove off with a flick of a dial. "It's about the only time you listen to me, anyway. Get your ass to the bedroom. Now."
"Yes, thir," Trevor said cheekily and bolted down the hall, but not before grabbing the package from the kitchen table. He'd been lying to Mason. He knew exactly what was in the package.
He had plans for that extra large bottle of lube. And the brushes. And the cherry vanilla body paint. And the video camera.