comfortable
so you learn lots of things when you're in a relationship. about yourself and about others. and i'm learning that i'm not a very comfortable person.
i think this is weird. why am i like this?
i still remember jaime telling me in the beginning of february that he wanted our love to be comfortable. he would get frustrated with me (and rightfully so) for constantly asking things and asking "do you mind?" he would always tell me that of COURSE he didn't mind and that's just all part of being in a relationship. i feel so formal all the time - i'm not good at asking favors and just sitting in the car without talking and asking for things. i always say i'm sorry all the time - over and over again - and i thank him repeatedly for things. i know this might sound sweet - and i know he appreciates it - but on some level, its also kind of annoying. how would i feel if a guy i was dating was always stepping on eggshells around me and was afraid to assert himself? it would get so old.
i wonder if i think i'm weirder than i actually am.
on another note, half of myself is moving to washington dc in about a week and a half and i am feeling a little lost. krista is my best friend and she's always been, at most, a couple hour's drive away almost the entire length of our friendship. life is changing and i'm just not sure what to do with it...
i think this is weird. why am i like this?
i still remember jaime telling me in the beginning of february that he wanted our love to be comfortable. he would get frustrated with me (and rightfully so) for constantly asking things and asking "do you mind?" he would always tell me that of COURSE he didn't mind and that's just all part of being in a relationship. i feel so formal all the time - i'm not good at asking favors and just sitting in the car without talking and asking for things. i always say i'm sorry all the time - over and over again - and i thank him repeatedly for things. i know this might sound sweet - and i know he appreciates it - but on some level, its also kind of annoying. how would i feel if a guy i was dating was always stepping on eggshells around me and was afraid to assert himself? it would get so old.
i wonder if i think i'm weirder than i actually am.
on another note, half of myself is moving to washington dc in about a week and a half and i am feeling a little lost. krista is my best friend and she's always been, at most, a couple hour's drive away almost the entire length of our friendship. life is changing and i'm just not sure what to do with it...