Texting is an Adventure 2/?
Title: Texting is an Adventure 2/?
Fandom: Stxi
Genre: humor,
Rating: R-ish?
Disclaimer: Yes, I am actually the people who own the ST franchise and Texts From Last Night. All of them. Simultaneously.
Characters/Pairings: Jim/Bones, Jim/Gaila, Gaila/Sulu, Gaila/OMC, Gaila/OMC/OFC, with Pavel, Christine Chapel, and Uhura making an appearance.
Warnings: referenced threesome
Beta: hyde_the_body (who is my hero)
A/n: To the men and women who actually live like this, I salute you! You make me wish I was going away for college. That way, I could do coke while drunkenly being pulled in a boat by a lawnmower and not have people I was in girl scouts with see it!
Inspired by Text From Last Night. One line per drabble is lifted from a post (directly or slightly altered). Pre-and-actual slash.
Texting part one
JTK: Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever
LHM: Why do you share these things with me?
JTK: You're my best friend! Who else am I gonna tell? Besides, you TOTALLY told me about what you did to that girl two months ago. That. Was. Filthy. So I'm allowed to share an innocuous detail.
LHM: I grudgingly accept your point.
LHM: Where's Jim? I haven't seen or heard from him in two days.
GO: Currently, he's hungover and at a garage sale down the street from where we've been all weekend, bargaining for a tuba.
LHM: ...Does he play?
GO: I don't know. I think he's planning to use it to drink beer at some point, though.
LHM: Would that even work? All the stops would have to be pressed at once.
GO: This is Jim we're talking about. I have no doubt that by Friday, he'll be sucking beer out of it somehow.
GO: I should lend him my soldering kit.
LHM: Stop enabling him
GO: I'll get free alcohol and sex out of this. So no.
LHM: Has he ever said no to sex with you?
GO: All right. I'll get free alcohol.
JTK: Fell asleep on the doorstep at a party and woke up to an old lady poking me with a broom. Please save me.
LHM: Don't you have someone else to beg for rescue?
JTK: Gaila's out of town. And I have no credits for a BART pass, or I wouldn't bother you. :(
LHM: I should wrap some credits in a handkerchief and pin it to your shirt like a five year old.
JTK: Drunk me would blow them on booze. Please Bones?
LHM: What do I get in return?
JTK: Beer? A blow job? My undying affection and gratitude?
LHM: Beer. If I ever have to save you from San Jose or further out, I expect that BJ.
JTK: You got it. I'm in Richmond. I can meet you at the El Cerrito del Norte station.
LHM: Be there soon. And I want several Triple beers from the Magnolia pub. You're not allowed to steal any.
JTK: Done.
GO: Laying in bed naked with the guy I just had sex with and talking to his wife over margaritas. Which he made for us.
JTK: You have no idea how envious I am of you, Gaila. Last time I fucked a married dude, his wife FLIPPED when she found us.
JTK: So there were no margaritas. :(
GO: Aaaaand threesome! Bye Jim!
JTK: >:( I hate you so much.
LHM: Please remind me to never, ever try to keep up with Jim shot for shot again. I have no idea what happened after 2300 yesterday.
NU: Told you it was a bad idea. Toward the end of the night, you were cradling him in your arms and feeding him rum straight from the bottle.
NU: He kept sucking your fingers.
LHM: Oh god. Did anyone else see?
NU: Half the command track and a third of the med track.
LHM: Fuuuuuuuuuck
GO: I think I'm in love.
JTK: With who?
GO: Hikaru Sulu. He didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
JTK: Impressive.
GO: You have no idea.
LHM: I find it astounding that you spelled 'drunken' wrong but 'pterodactyl' right.
JTK: I am a man of many talents. And seriously do yuo want to?
LHM: No. I stopped getting on kiddie rides when I was about nine.
JTK: Its not a kiddie ride! Its a pterodactyl! Two very different things.
LHM: Drugs are bad, Jim.
JTK: DRUNK
LHM: Uh huh. Make sure you check in with me when you get in.
JTK: IM JUST DRUNK!!!
PAC: Workers at McDonalds drive through would not serve us last night, even though we said we were on tiny motorcycles that were too small for them to see and for the sensors to register.
PAC: Christine made noises and everything. I am so sad.
HS: ...I don't even know where to start. Christine Chapel? What the hell were you doing with her?
PAC: She can drink me under the table. I might be in love.
PAC: And you could console me. McDonalds chicken nuggets are the best outside Russia and I was denied! :(
HS: Those are half saw dust.
HS: Then again, you also like Taco Bell, so I shouldn't be surprised.
PAC: Then it is delicious saw dust and even better when drunk. Founders of both places must be Russian.
HS: You're not allowed to drink anymore.
PAC: :(
JTK: Bones, do you know where my PADD is? I've turned the room upside down and I can't find it.
LHM: The refrigerator.
JTK: What the hell? Are you serious?
JTK: Oh my god, you are. I don't even understand.
LHM: You said, "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently, drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
JTK: This explains so much.
JTK: I caught my sex unicorn!
HS: What does that even mean?
JTK: I bagged Bones! :D
HS: Why are you telling me this?
JTK: Because I need to share my happiness, Hikaru. Everyone needs to feel my joy.
JTK: Are you feeling it?
HS: If I say yes, will it end this conversation?
JTK: Possibly.
JTK: In the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and said, "back to business". I'm never going to let go.
GO: He already poops in front of you, so I'm pretty sure you don't have to worry about him going anywhere.
JTK: Do you have to remind me about that?
GO: Yes. You whined about it for DAYS.
JTK: It was the foulest shit EVER! Even the toilet in juvie didn't smell so bad.
JTK: Say it nicely.
LHM: Fine. I want to affectionately bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
JTK: Yep. What time will you be back?
Fandom: Stxi
Genre: humor,
Rating: R-ish?
Disclaimer: Yes, I am actually the people who own the ST franchise and Texts From Last Night. All of them. Simultaneously.
Characters/Pairings: Jim/Bones, Jim/Gaila, Gaila/Sulu, Gaila/OMC, Gaila/OMC/OFC, with Pavel, Christine Chapel, and Uhura making an appearance.
Warnings: referenced threesome
Beta: hyde_the_body (who is my hero)
A/n: To the men and women who actually live like this, I salute you! You make me wish I was going away for college. That way, I could do coke while drunkenly being pulled in a boat by a lawnmower and not have people I was in girl scouts with see it!
Inspired by Text From Last Night. One line per drabble is lifted from a post (directly or slightly altered). Pre-and-actual slash.
Texting part one
JTK: Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever
LHM: Why do you share these things with me?
JTK: You're my best friend! Who else am I gonna tell? Besides, you TOTALLY told me about what you did to that girl two months ago. That. Was. Filthy. So I'm allowed to share an innocuous detail.
LHM: I grudgingly accept your point.
LHM: Where's Jim? I haven't seen or heard from him in two days.
GO: Currently, he's hungover and at a garage sale down the street from where we've been all weekend, bargaining for a tuba.
LHM: ...Does he play?
GO: I don't know. I think he's planning to use it to drink beer at some point, though.
LHM: Would that even work? All the stops would have to be pressed at once.
GO: This is Jim we're talking about. I have no doubt that by Friday, he'll be sucking beer out of it somehow.
GO: I should lend him my soldering kit.
LHM: Stop enabling him
GO: I'll get free alcohol and sex out of this. So no.
LHM: Has he ever said no to sex with you?
GO: All right. I'll get free alcohol.
JTK: Fell asleep on the doorstep at a party and woke up to an old lady poking me with a broom. Please save me.
LHM: Don't you have someone else to beg for rescue?
JTK: Gaila's out of town. And I have no credits for a BART pass, or I wouldn't bother you. :(
LHM: I should wrap some credits in a handkerchief and pin it to your shirt like a five year old.
JTK: Drunk me would blow them on booze. Please Bones?
LHM: What do I get in return?
JTK: Beer? A blow job? My undying affection and gratitude?
LHM: Beer. If I ever have to save you from San Jose or further out, I expect that BJ.
JTK: You got it. I'm in Richmond. I can meet you at the El Cerrito del Norte station.
LHM: Be there soon. And I want several Triple beers from the Magnolia pub. You're not allowed to steal any.
JTK: Done.
GO: Laying in bed naked with the guy I just had sex with and talking to his wife over margaritas. Which he made for us.
JTK: You have no idea how envious I am of you, Gaila. Last time I fucked a married dude, his wife FLIPPED when she found us.
JTK: So there were no margaritas. :(
GO: Aaaaand threesome! Bye Jim!
JTK: >:( I hate you so much.
LHM: Please remind me to never, ever try to keep up with Jim shot for shot again. I have no idea what happened after 2300 yesterday.
NU: Told you it was a bad idea. Toward the end of the night, you were cradling him in your arms and feeding him rum straight from the bottle.
NU: He kept sucking your fingers.
LHM: Oh god. Did anyone else see?
NU: Half the command track and a third of the med track.
LHM: Fuuuuuuuuuck
GO: I think I'm in love.
JTK: With who?
GO: Hikaru Sulu. He didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
JTK: Impressive.
GO: You have no idea.
LHM: I find it astounding that you spelled 'drunken' wrong but 'pterodactyl' right.
JTK: I am a man of many talents. And seriously do yuo want to?
LHM: No. I stopped getting on kiddie rides when I was about nine.
JTK: Its not a kiddie ride! Its a pterodactyl! Two very different things.
LHM: Drugs are bad, Jim.
JTK: DRUNK
LHM: Uh huh. Make sure you check in with me when you get in.
JTK: IM JUST DRUNK!!!
PAC: Workers at McDonalds drive through would not serve us last night, even though we said we were on tiny motorcycles that were too small for them to see and for the sensors to register.
PAC: Christine made noises and everything. I am so sad.
HS: ...I don't even know where to start. Christine Chapel? What the hell were you doing with her?
PAC: She can drink me under the table. I might be in love.
PAC: And you could console me. McDonalds chicken nuggets are the best outside Russia and I was denied! :(
HS: Those are half saw dust.
HS: Then again, you also like Taco Bell, so I shouldn't be surprised.
PAC: Then it is delicious saw dust and even better when drunk. Founders of both places must be Russian.
HS: You're not allowed to drink anymore.
PAC: :(
JTK: Bones, do you know where my PADD is? I've turned the room upside down and I can't find it.
LHM: The refrigerator.
JTK: What the hell? Are you serious?
JTK: Oh my god, you are. I don't even understand.
LHM: You said, "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently, drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
JTK: This explains so much.
JTK: I caught my sex unicorn!
HS: What does that even mean?
JTK: I bagged Bones! :D
HS: Why are you telling me this?
JTK: Because I need to share my happiness, Hikaru. Everyone needs to feel my joy.
JTK: Are you feeling it?
HS: If I say yes, will it end this conversation?
JTK: Possibly.
JTK: In the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and said, "back to business". I'm never going to let go.
GO: He already poops in front of you, so I'm pretty sure you don't have to worry about him going anywhere.
JTK: Do you have to remind me about that?
GO: Yes. You whined about it for DAYS.
JTK: It was the foulest shit EVER! Even the toilet in juvie didn't smell so bad.
JTK: Say it nicely.
LHM: Fine. I want to affectionately bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
JTK: Yep. What time will you be back?