muses_w_remotes | 11.9. Brothers & Sisters quote
11.9. "You've done nothing but cause my family pain, so if your perfect little world has come crashing down around you because the truth has finally come out, you know what, join the damn club!"
| Brothers & Sisters
Co-written with agentsullivan
[Follows THIS and THIS]
When Ali saw Marc coming up the hallway of the ER she didn’t even bother to continue on her path to the water cooler. She just sighed, pushing her hair out of her face, and went over to him. “James…” she said tiredly. “She’s not the spawn of Satan, you know. I asked for your help just this once and you couldn’t even give me that?” She shook her head tiredly, already reaching for the baby capsule.
“I don’t know anything about kids, Ali! I don’t know how to look after her. I just… I’m sorry. I did try.” But Marc kept a hold of the baby capsule for the moment. He looked down into it, shaking his own head as he bit on his lip.
“She’s your fucking niece, James. Either you want to be part of her life or you don’t. If you don’t, then fuck off and don’t bother coming back,” Ali told him bluntly but didn’t fight him for the capsule. “If you do, it’s all or nothing.”
Marc moved off to the side of the corridor so they were out of the immediate rush of passing people. “I do,” he insisted. “I just don’t know how to and I know this is a bad time for you and you need help, but how am I supposed to help if I don’t know how? This is the third time I’ve seen her!”
Ali frowned, pursing her lips. “And whose fault is that?”
“I know… I know…” Marc murmured. “I’ve been really busy and I know that sounds like a fucking excuse but my work is unpredictable. No two days are the same. I’m living about four different lives and investigating about a hundred more. I can be in New York one day and London the next morning, or any other possible fucking country. If people can’t understand that, maybe I am just fucking better being alone! It’s not like I didn’t warn everyone. When I joined the SS, I took an oath and made massive fucking commitments. My job is the easy part. It’s everyone in my personal life that wants to tear me in eight hundred different directions and I don’t know how to please everyone! I don’t even know if I put her diaper on the right way! I should’ve just… I should’ve…” He stopped, shaking his head. “I should’ve just kept to myself.”
Ali hooked her hand into his elbow and tugged him over to a nearby bench to sit down. She finally took the capsule from him and set it down on the seat beside her so she could lift Jamie from it and nurse her. “What’s going on? I know it’s more than me asking you to babysit for a few hours. It’s more than me wanting you in Sunshine’s life.”
Marc sat down heavily and dropped his head into his hands. “She told me she got it. I warned her. I warned her over and fucking over and she told me she got it. She didn’t care. She understood. It would be okay. I’ve been away in Canada for the last two days undercover and I couldn’t contact her to warn her or tell her where I was. That’s just it. It’s the job. It’s what I do in the Secret Service. They call it ‘secret’ for a reason,” he mumbled, voice hushed so only Ali could hear him. “But she was pissed off when I went over to her place for help with Jamie. I thought between the two of us we could pull it off but you would’ve thought I asked her to babysit a fucking army the way she was acting. It’s not exactly the reception I would’ve expected after getting home from a job from someone who supposedly understood and didn’t mind. This relationship thing… I really don’t think my job is conducive to it. I thought I could pull it off, but I’m not a miracle worker. If she’s pissed off with it, she’s pissed off, isn’t she? I can’t change it. I didn’t literally give up my whole life and everything I knew to just throw it all away. What I’m doing is important to me. It’s important to me to do the best job I can and succeed at it. It’s what got me recruited in the first place and you know what? I’m fucking proud of myself. I’m proud I was good enough for them to want me. I feel like that’s what my purpose is.”
“She might’ve just been having a bad day, love. Trust me, us chicks do shit like that. It can’t be easy to just have her boyfriend disappear abruptly then rock up with a baby out of the blue. You should talk to her about it,” Ali suggested, leaning forward to watch his face.
Marc met her gaze and gave his head a slight shake. “I warned her, Ali. From the start, even if she didn’t know the real me then, I’ve been warning her. Once she knew who I was and what I was, I warned her all over again. I asked her over and over if she wanted to deal with this shit and she kept saying yes. And alright, I know it was hardly the pleasure chest showing up on her doorstep with Jamie, but I needed help and who else was I going to ask for help? I’ve had two hours sleep since I left for Canada. I drove twelve hours to get there because I needed to consult in Boston first. Then I caught the red-eye back to NY and I was still at the airport when your call came in. If she’s had a bad day, then she’s not on her own. I wanted to help you, Al. I did. It’s just been really bad timing and she’s better off with you. But I do want to be part of her life. You just need to teach me how to do that without fucking her over in the process. I don’t know what to do with kids. I’m more scared of handling a kid than I am an AK47. Kids weren’t in my plan!”
“They weren’t in mine, either,” Ali pointed out wryly. “But now she is and I deal with it. I wouldn’t change it. She’s not an object, James. She’s a little person who can hear and see and feel just like the rest of us. The only problem is, she doesn’t know yet how to tell us what’s she’s feeling and that’s the basic foundation to looking after a kid. You just need to try different things to get the answer. There is no immediate fix. You were always good with your kid victims. You knew what to say, they listened to you, you got the answers you needed and you never freaked out. You’re freaking out now because you don’t know how to deal with babies. Well, I fucking didn’t either. You learn. You’re also freaking out because she’s part of you. She’s your flesh and blood and it’s going to hurt if you can’t relate to her. But you aren’t going to relate to her if you keep your distance. She needs to get to know you and get to trust you. It’s like any relationship, James. Just because she can’t talk to you doesn’t mean she’s not responding to you. Your brother walked away from her, and to the fuck with him. Don’t make the same mistake. As for your relationship with Harri, you’re adults. You both have mouths and are probably both as stubborn as all shit. If she can’t handle taking you as you are with your job and responsibility to the Service, then she needs to tell you. And if you can’t handle a relationship as well as shouldering your obligations to the SS, then you need to tell her and ASAP, James. She doesn’t deserve to be fucked over.”
Marc closed his eyes and nodded. “You’re right,” he mumbled.
“Of course I’m right,” Ali scoffed, rubbing her daughters back softly. “I just wish you’d picked any other day but today to be an insecure shit. I really didn’t want her to have to be stuck in the ER for hours on end.”
“I’m so sorry,” Marc told her and put his arm around her in a hug. “You know when I fuck up, I fuck up royally. How is your other half? Has he said anything since you told him how much I screwed you over?”
Ali shook her head with a sigh. “No. He won’t talk about it. I mean, he was shocked and pretty disturbed by it. Who wouldn’t be? FBI and SS shit can be daunting to someone who isn’t knowledgeable of it. But no. He hasn’t raised the subject again. He just told me we would talk about it soon but every time I’ve tried to bring it up since I showed him your photo, he keeps telling me he isn’t ready to talk about it. I think he actually wants to tear your balls off, but it’s not in his nature to hurt you because you’re connected to me. I’m thinking he’s feeling between a rock and a hard place and until he’s ready, I’m not going to push him on it. So, if he doesn’t make an effort to talk to you, don’t take offense.”
Marc nodded. “Yeah, I understand. I didn’t expect the guy to accept me into your family with open arms and cheek kisses. I’m not going to intrude. Is he going to be alright here? He was hurt at work right? Or got sick?” he asked.
“Hurt. He got shoved down some stairs when he went on a call out. Drug overdose and the boyfriend didn’t want authorities involved and knew they would be if she was brought into the hospital. Andrew being there in a paramedic uniform was enough to piss the guy off. He was pushed, fell and hit his head on the wall and broke his ankle.” Ali stopped, letting out a heavy breath as she watched her daughter sleeping. “Bad things always seem to happen to good people. Bad people need people like you to take them the fuck down and that’s why I never blamed you for leaving to join the Service. I’m proud of you, Jimbo. Like you wouldn’t believe,” she told him softly.
Marc let out a small sigh of relief to hear those words. He hugged her tighter and kissed her temple. “I’ll stay with you until he’s discharged and take you both home,” he promised. “You can start teaching me how not to be Uncle Dick of the Century.”
All muses referenced with permission
Word Count | 1,787
| Brothers & Sisters
Co-written with agentsullivan
[Follows THIS and THIS]
When Ali saw Marc coming up the hallway of the ER she didn’t even bother to continue on her path to the water cooler. She just sighed, pushing her hair out of her face, and went over to him. “James…” she said tiredly. “She’s not the spawn of Satan, you know. I asked for your help just this once and you couldn’t even give me that?” She shook her head tiredly, already reaching for the baby capsule.
“I don’t know anything about kids, Ali! I don’t know how to look after her. I just… I’m sorry. I did try.” But Marc kept a hold of the baby capsule for the moment. He looked down into it, shaking his own head as he bit on his lip.
“She’s your fucking niece, James. Either you want to be part of her life or you don’t. If you don’t, then fuck off and don’t bother coming back,” Ali told him bluntly but didn’t fight him for the capsule. “If you do, it’s all or nothing.”
Marc moved off to the side of the corridor so they were out of the immediate rush of passing people. “I do,” he insisted. “I just don’t know how to and I know this is a bad time for you and you need help, but how am I supposed to help if I don’t know how? This is the third time I’ve seen her!”
Ali frowned, pursing her lips. “And whose fault is that?”
“I know… I know…” Marc murmured. “I’ve been really busy and I know that sounds like a fucking excuse but my work is unpredictable. No two days are the same. I’m living about four different lives and investigating about a hundred more. I can be in New York one day and London the next morning, or any other possible fucking country. If people can’t understand that, maybe I am just fucking better being alone! It’s not like I didn’t warn everyone. When I joined the SS, I took an oath and made massive fucking commitments. My job is the easy part. It’s everyone in my personal life that wants to tear me in eight hundred different directions and I don’t know how to please everyone! I don’t even know if I put her diaper on the right way! I should’ve just… I should’ve…” He stopped, shaking his head. “I should’ve just kept to myself.”
Ali hooked her hand into his elbow and tugged him over to a nearby bench to sit down. She finally took the capsule from him and set it down on the seat beside her so she could lift Jamie from it and nurse her. “What’s going on? I know it’s more than me asking you to babysit for a few hours. It’s more than me wanting you in Sunshine’s life.”
Marc sat down heavily and dropped his head into his hands. “She told me she got it. I warned her. I warned her over and fucking over and she told me she got it. She didn’t care. She understood. It would be okay. I’ve been away in Canada for the last two days undercover and I couldn’t contact her to warn her or tell her where I was. That’s just it. It’s the job. It’s what I do in the Secret Service. They call it ‘secret’ for a reason,” he mumbled, voice hushed so only Ali could hear him. “But she was pissed off when I went over to her place for help with Jamie. I thought between the two of us we could pull it off but you would’ve thought I asked her to babysit a fucking army the way she was acting. It’s not exactly the reception I would’ve expected after getting home from a job from someone who supposedly understood and didn’t mind. This relationship thing… I really don’t think my job is conducive to it. I thought I could pull it off, but I’m not a miracle worker. If she’s pissed off with it, she’s pissed off, isn’t she? I can’t change it. I didn’t literally give up my whole life and everything I knew to just throw it all away. What I’m doing is important to me. It’s important to me to do the best job I can and succeed at it. It’s what got me recruited in the first place and you know what? I’m fucking proud of myself. I’m proud I was good enough for them to want me. I feel like that’s what my purpose is.”
“She might’ve just been having a bad day, love. Trust me, us chicks do shit like that. It can’t be easy to just have her boyfriend disappear abruptly then rock up with a baby out of the blue. You should talk to her about it,” Ali suggested, leaning forward to watch his face.
Marc met her gaze and gave his head a slight shake. “I warned her, Ali. From the start, even if she didn’t know the real me then, I’ve been warning her. Once she knew who I was and what I was, I warned her all over again. I asked her over and over if she wanted to deal with this shit and she kept saying yes. And alright, I know it was hardly the pleasure chest showing up on her doorstep with Jamie, but I needed help and who else was I going to ask for help? I’ve had two hours sleep since I left for Canada. I drove twelve hours to get there because I needed to consult in Boston first. Then I caught the red-eye back to NY and I was still at the airport when your call came in. If she’s had a bad day, then she’s not on her own. I wanted to help you, Al. I did. It’s just been really bad timing and she’s better off with you. But I do want to be part of her life. You just need to teach me how to do that without fucking her over in the process. I don’t know what to do with kids. I’m more scared of handling a kid than I am an AK47. Kids weren’t in my plan!”
“They weren’t in mine, either,” Ali pointed out wryly. “But now she is and I deal with it. I wouldn’t change it. She’s not an object, James. She’s a little person who can hear and see and feel just like the rest of us. The only problem is, she doesn’t know yet how to tell us what’s she’s feeling and that’s the basic foundation to looking after a kid. You just need to try different things to get the answer. There is no immediate fix. You were always good with your kid victims. You knew what to say, they listened to you, you got the answers you needed and you never freaked out. You’re freaking out now because you don’t know how to deal with babies. Well, I fucking didn’t either. You learn. You’re also freaking out because she’s part of you. She’s your flesh and blood and it’s going to hurt if you can’t relate to her. But you aren’t going to relate to her if you keep your distance. She needs to get to know you and get to trust you. It’s like any relationship, James. Just because she can’t talk to you doesn’t mean she’s not responding to you. Your brother walked away from her, and to the fuck with him. Don’t make the same mistake. As for your relationship with Harri, you’re adults. You both have mouths and are probably both as stubborn as all shit. If she can’t handle taking you as you are with your job and responsibility to the Service, then she needs to tell you. And if you can’t handle a relationship as well as shouldering your obligations to the SS, then you need to tell her and ASAP, James. She doesn’t deserve to be fucked over.”
Marc closed his eyes and nodded. “You’re right,” he mumbled.
“Of course I’m right,” Ali scoffed, rubbing her daughters back softly. “I just wish you’d picked any other day but today to be an insecure shit. I really didn’t want her to have to be stuck in the ER for hours on end.”
“I’m so sorry,” Marc told her and put his arm around her in a hug. “You know when I fuck up, I fuck up royally. How is your other half? Has he said anything since you told him how much I screwed you over?”
Ali shook her head with a sigh. “No. He won’t talk about it. I mean, he was shocked and pretty disturbed by it. Who wouldn’t be? FBI and SS shit can be daunting to someone who isn’t knowledgeable of it. But no. He hasn’t raised the subject again. He just told me we would talk about it soon but every time I’ve tried to bring it up since I showed him your photo, he keeps telling me he isn’t ready to talk about it. I think he actually wants to tear your balls off, but it’s not in his nature to hurt you because you’re connected to me. I’m thinking he’s feeling between a rock and a hard place and until he’s ready, I’m not going to push him on it. So, if he doesn’t make an effort to talk to you, don’t take offense.”
Marc nodded. “Yeah, I understand. I didn’t expect the guy to accept me into your family with open arms and cheek kisses. I’m not going to intrude. Is he going to be alright here? He was hurt at work right? Or got sick?” he asked.
“Hurt. He got shoved down some stairs when he went on a call out. Drug overdose and the boyfriend didn’t want authorities involved and knew they would be if she was brought into the hospital. Andrew being there in a paramedic uniform was enough to piss the guy off. He was pushed, fell and hit his head on the wall and broke his ankle.” Ali stopped, letting out a heavy breath as she watched her daughter sleeping. “Bad things always seem to happen to good people. Bad people need people like you to take them the fuck down and that’s why I never blamed you for leaving to join the Service. I’m proud of you, Jimbo. Like you wouldn’t believe,” she told him softly.
Marc let out a small sigh of relief to hear those words. He hugged her tighter and kissed her temple. “I’ll stay with you until he’s discharged and take you both home,” he promised. “You can start teaching me how not to be Uncle Dick of the Century.”
All muses referenced with permission
Word Count | 1,787