(no subject)
bottle up and explooooooddeeee
over and over
i expect it to happen soon. i've been constantly staying busy. school, work, school work, talk to tom or someone for a bit, more school work, sleep. then repeat. i should be starting my period soon, i hope. if not that means i am pregnant except that's impossible. although in one of my senior pictures, i appear to be in the 2nd trimester. . . . um. god that would suck.
i've had a headache about everyday this week, especially wed,thurs, and today. really bad. i need to sleep but i am skipping work to do some laundry, print teacher recommendation forms, write college essays, change kitty litter which i meant to do yesterday and now it smells, finish AP music theory hw, finsih reading ishmael, do the freud thing for english, um um.. i really don't remember all i have to do but i don't care if i'm missing out on what money i would be making at work.
i'm fucking irritable, goddamnit.
i want to have an arts & crafts night soon, and make christmas presents but who has time for that? i have to get in bed by a decent hour because i have work in the morning. i better cry soon or i'll be pissed, but not pissed enough to cry. see, when i'm feeling something wrong iwth me i can never pinpoint whatever it is i feel bad about. i think it might be guilt that i didn't finish my college app due the 15th, and that i didn't go to work today or bother calling in about it. i feel like i owe someone something but i dont know who or what. i want to wake up tomorrow and it's 2000.
and i want to have dreams tonight. i don't even remember my dreams anymore
and that used to be one of my favorite parts of the day.
did i ever mention i love dreams? my sister is into it more though, like what symbolism and stuff lies within them. i just tell her, and she tells me what they mean.
i suppose having no dreams or any recollection means that i'm just really dull and empty.
over and over
i expect it to happen soon. i've been constantly staying busy. school, work, school work, talk to tom or someone for a bit, more school work, sleep. then repeat. i should be starting my period soon, i hope. if not that means i am pregnant except that's impossible. although in one of my senior pictures, i appear to be in the 2nd trimester. . . . um. god that would suck.
i've had a headache about everyday this week, especially wed,thurs, and today. really bad. i need to sleep but i am skipping work to do some laundry, print teacher recommendation forms, write college essays, change kitty litter which i meant to do yesterday and now it smells, finish AP music theory hw, finsih reading ishmael, do the freud thing for english, um um.. i really don't remember all i have to do but i don't care if i'm missing out on what money i would be making at work.
i'm fucking irritable, goddamnit.
i want to have an arts & crafts night soon, and make christmas presents but who has time for that? i have to get in bed by a decent hour because i have work in the morning. i better cry soon or i'll be pissed, but not pissed enough to cry. see, when i'm feeling something wrong iwth me i can never pinpoint whatever it is i feel bad about. i think it might be guilt that i didn't finish my college app due the 15th, and that i didn't go to work today or bother calling in about it. i feel like i owe someone something but i dont know who or what. i want to wake up tomorrow and it's 2000.
and i want to have dreams tonight. i don't even remember my dreams anymore
and that used to be one of my favorite parts of the day.
did i ever mention i love dreams? my sister is into it more though, like what symbolism and stuff lies within them. i just tell her, and she tells me what they mean.
i suppose having no dreams or any recollection means that i'm just really dull and empty.