Eliot's Place, 75 Godiva Street, Wednesday Night

[age_of_the_geek]

So this day was all kinds of fired. First, Hardison had met some crazy, murder hobo version of his boyfriend in the park and had gotten to have not-so happy funtimes with the wrong end baseball bat. And then on his way home, he'd kept seeing things out of the corner of his eye, but when he'd turned to see what was out there, there was absolutely

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[vdistinctive]

Eliot came in from what had turned out to be a rather extended walk for Val as he'd gone over every inch of the island for signs of whatever it was Kathy couldn't properly remember anymore.

He'd seen a lot of flickers of creepy evil. Not a lot of clues, though.

Val went barrelling gleefully up to Hardison, enormously glad to be home, then paused and whimpered when she got close. He still had some murder hobo smell on him. She climbed up on the couch next to him and nosed at his shoulder, looking pathetic.

"Val, down," Eliot said, though they both could tell he didn't really mean it. "Man, you would not believe who I ran into in town today."

[age_of_the_geek]

"Bet my answer is worse than your answer," Hardison said, looking up at Eliot and letting him see the big black eye he was sporting. And cuddled Val a little closer, as if he were defying Eliot's attempt at getting her to heal.

He needed snuggles. Puppy snuggles were an excellent start.

[vdistinctive]

Val was more than happy to oblige! She snuffled her nose into Hardison's neck then leaned up to try to lick his chin. She was helping!

"Jesus --" Eliot was over next to Hardison in an instant, crouching down to get a good look at that shiner. "Who the fuck did this to you?!"

Eliot was going to have to go murder him a murder hobo, wasn't he.

[whoisalicewhite]

"Weirdness everywhere," Parker said, coming in from the cold, taking off her scarf. "Too many people. Weird light. And-- Hardison?" Parker stopped to stare at Hardison. "What happened?"

[age_of_the_geek]

No! That was how the cycle of murder hobo started!

...Although a stout beating might be in order, yes.

"Who did this to me? You did!" he accused, shaking a finger at Eliot. "With your damn felt hat an' crazy eyes an' a bat! You took a bat to me, man!" And then he swiftly dropped his finger because his whole arm hurt, dammit. "I was mindin' my own business when I saw you in the park an' then after five minutes of conversation, you just started wailin' on me!"

He'd explain more fully in a moment, but he was very upset and maybe just the tiniest bit concussed. Because there had been a murder hobo with a bat!

[vdistinctive]

Eliot stared at the accusing finger in confusion for a moment, then cursed softly. "You met the other Eliot."

Kathy was apparently understating the whole "not all there" part, huh.

[whoisalicewhite]

"Wait what WHAT?" Pardon Parker for getting whiplash here, she was working with limited information. "Other? As in more than one? Do you have a murder twin, Eliot?" She leaned over to not-gently pat Hardison's head. She was still working on the comfort thing. "How many of me are there? Wait, that's not supposed to be a trick question."

[age_of_the_geek]

"Wait, you knew about this?" Hardison demanded, batting Parker's hand away. "An' you didn't tell nobody? Do you know how hard it is to fight you off when you're superpowered by murder hobo madness?"

And then, to Parker, he added, "Not the head, mama. I've got a headache somethin' fierce an' the ibuprofen I took ain't kickin' in yet."

[vdistinctive]

"I didn't know he had a bat!" That was helpful. "I ran into Kathy in town. That's what I was gonna tell you. She ain't our Kathy, she's from some hell dimension where apparently we're all mindless monsters or something."

Still hadn't processed that accurately, nope.

[whoisalicewhite]

"So you do have a murder twin," Parker realized. "And -- wait, Kathy?! She's alive?!" Eeeeee! Emotional whiplash, Parker was having it. She handed Hardison a pillow, because that was way softer than hands, right?

[age_of_the_geek]

"Murder hobo," Hardison mumbled, reaching for the pillow--and the woman offering it. Look, people, he needed cuddles, all right? And Val was a good start, but she didn't hold a candle to either Parker or Eliot.

But Eliot's words meant he wasn't laying down just yet. "Does that mean that Raven is here, too, somewhere?" he asked, unable to keep the naked hope off his face.

[vdistinctive]

Eliot dug his hands into his hair and sighed. "I don't know. Maybe. Apparently whatever this is fucks with your memories. Kathy wasn't real clear on Raven's name."

[whoisalicewhite]

Parker made a wounded sound at that statement, and let herself be pulled into Hardison's side as a teddy-bear. "We've got to help her. And the murder hobo. Although helping him might mean shooting him with tranquilizers, it sounds like. And that just seems so wrong, because I'd think he'd kill everyone else first before he killed us." It was just very not-Eliot in so many ways. "Did he have a Val-puppy with him?"

[age_of_the_geek]

Hardison shook his head and immediately groaned. He needed to stop doing that. "I mentioned her an' he didn't even register it, I don't think. I ain't sure he remembered who that was."

[vdistinctive]

"Kathy couldn't remember her name, either." Eliot didn't want to think too closely about what might or might not have happened to that Eliot's Val. "Why did he attack you?"

[age_of_the_geek]

"Cause murder hobos gotta murder?" Hardison suggested. Look, he was tired and he hurt all over, practically wrapping himself around Parker like a lamprey and giving Eliot reproachful glares for not getting in on this cuddle party. "He said...he said I wasn't me. That I was walking around, but that I was gone. He said that Parker an' I were dead. An' before he wandered off, he begged me to kill him, too."

HUGS NAO PLZ