Home...

[agape86]

Home is one of those amazing things. There is never a definition that can quite stretch enough around the edges to fully encompass it. When you are in university, you never truly have a 'home' that is yours. Residence? Bah! Are you joking? Your high school/family home? Maybe that is the cliche that 'home is where the heart is' but it isn't really YOURS. Maybe if you live in an apartment while going to school. But, then are you sharing it? Are you settled/will you be there for the entire forseeable future? Rarely I suppose is that the case. So then, what can we define as our home? I think my evolving definition would be that it is a combination of where I physically, mentally, and emotionally am. If you can get all of those things in the same place at the same time, you're doing great. By the end of August, I cannot wait for my home to be my dorm room. In December/January, there is no place that I would ever want to be except with my family in our/their home. April comes, and it switches. Constantly bouncing back and forth. I cannot wait for the day that I know that I will be in my home - and I don't mean the physical place necessarily (because I do not know yet if I will ever have a 'permanent' physical home), I just mean a place in my personal life/being that is mine and where I am at peace. When I know that my beliefs, values, morals, and life-structure has been entirely built and is now ready to be tested. Unfortunately (and fortunately in some ways I suppose), this is life which means that the test period begins from the very first thought that goes through your mind that is truly your own and runs until the day we die. I can only hope and put myself through enough molding experiences that my structure will be able to withstand the tests and I will become at home.

Merry Christmas everyone! Happy holidays too. I hope everyone is safe, happy, and healthy this holiday season.