so

[againsthemirror]

As you know, school started this week. basically I guess everyone saw this as a "leave danielle alone" time period. I guess that's pretty cool you guys. But within the past few days, everything fucking confuses me so much, how everything could change so fast. Summer ended just as fast as it came, taking the memories along with it. I can't really say I didn't see it coming though. I've stopped wishing on 11:11, I've stopped staying awake till 11:11 (with tonight as an exception), I've stopped caring, trying, and pretending. and I've started to give up on everything and to shut people out. I don't exactly WANT to shut people out, but I feel like I am forced. I don't want to be the person waiting on a phonecall or a sign that everything is going to be okay, I don't want to be the "third-wheel" friend, or the person you just feel bad for. This is about my relationship with about 4 people, either friends, ex-friends, or something different: What are we holding onto? Do you just like to know that you can keep me hanging on? Because you can't anymore, because I've given up. Nothing really lasts forever whether it be frienships, relationships, or anything else of that matter. So why waste my time and yours? None of you actually care about my feelings, if you did you would attempt to do something about it, so don't lie to me. I wish things were different, but obviously they aren't going to be so there isn't any use trying to fight an unstoppable force.
Thanks for reading this. I'm open to conversation, but don't start accusing me of shit. If my entries bother you or hurt you, don't read them.