He reaches for Gwen without consciously realizing it and feels instant relief at finding her warm body next to his. Before he can think he clutches her close, kisses the back of her neck. Even as he is reassuring himself of her life and safety bits and pieces of the dream, nightmares are coming to him. Gwen blood on her gown a stain growing between her legs before she faints dead. In another her belly swells huge with a nightmare beast born of magic and a terrible deal he has made. In another still he holds her hand as childbed fever burns up her life.
Arthur presses her closer and still she does not stir, so deeply asleep is she. He slides one hand over her abdomen and presses it there gently, gently. No change but they've been married for a while now and Gwen is very regular. There has been no interruption in their nightly congress these last six weeks. More still though she is a light sleeper but recently she has been sleeping long and deep.
He's almost certain of her pregnancy and it scares him to his very core. He can't stop thinking about his mother or her ghost. "Your father bartered my life for yours." He knows that has done nothing of the sort but so many women died from pregnancy, in labor or after he cannot shake the fear. Camelot needs heirs, children but Arthur needs his queen and it is too soon to loose her.
Not at all=} I loved it! I love reading fics where Arthur is angsty about having children because it is so understandable after what happened to his mother.
Oh, the angst of this one. And I think it's so realistic because it's something he especially would fear. You already have the medieval factor, which you brought up brilliantly, of how pregnancies could end up terribly, but also his whole personal fear because of his mother. And I love how he keeps clutching her to him.
He reaches for Gwen without consciously realizing it and feels instant relief at finding her warm body next to his. Before he can think he clutches her close, kisses the back of her neck. Even as he is reassuring himself of her life and safety bits and pieces of the dream, nightmares are coming to him. Gwen blood on her gown a stain growing between her legs before she faints dead. In another her belly swells huge with a nightmare beast born of magic and a terrible deal he has made. In another still he holds her hand as childbed fever burns up her life.
Arthur presses her closer and still she does not stir, so deeply asleep is she. He slides one hand over her abdomen and presses it there gently, gently. No change but they've been married for a while now and Gwen is very regular. There has been no interruption in their nightly congress these last six weeks. More still though she is a light sleeper but recently she has been sleeping long and deep.
He's almost certain of her pregnancy and it scares him to his very core. He can't stop thinking about his mother or her ghost. "Your father bartered my life for yours." He knows that has done nothing of the sort but so many women died from pregnancy, in labor or after he cannot shake the fear. Camelot needs heirs, children but Arthur needs his queen and it is too soon to loose her.
*probably not what you were expecting*
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Glad you liked it though. :)
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Thanks for reading soon as I finish this next one I'm gonna read some of the fills.
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This is so angsty and so well written. Love it.
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