(no subject)
When I'm sleep deprived, I do this thing, I try to organize stuff, and I hide it from myself. First I couldn't find the group's money and receipts, and then I couldn't find some of the stuff I bought with the group's money.
I'm less sleep-deprived now, feel normal.
I really feel wrapped up in my problems. It's not that normal kind of thing where you have to take care of yourself and sometimes put your own peace of mind first, it's where you can't take your mind off stuff and you shut stuff out because you can't handle it.
They say the worst part of sleep deprivation is not how bad you feel in the middle of it, it's that things start going bad the next day or the next.
I feel crappy and self-absorbed. Well, at least I know it now.
I have a friend at church, he was that kind of person who just walks up and introduces himself, and says hello. I was kind of suspicious at first, then realized it was all genuine, he was being himself. He's homeless now, but twice now has been promised some kind of review of his situation, is waiting for the second one to come up, so I hope they find him a place. They say the idea with getting public funds is to keep applying. And he's not a leech, he got cleaned up, is clean and sober now, just left with the consequences of whatever he did before that. So I hope he makes it.
Homeless sucks, and I would be homeless right now if my mom didn't let me live here rent free. I know when I first was homeless, I was grateful, because I didn't have to live with my mom, who just argued and argued and argued with me, would just start arguments about little stuff and infuriate me. Then I let someone push me into a job I wasn't ready for, not realizing I had a multiple personality, and schizophrenia, and etc. I was just worried about impressing the people I lived with that I was willing to work hard. I got raped at the job, repressed that memory, and got hit by a car--which was a blessing too, becuase the rape situation would have kept happening. It had happened before, and I didn't remember it.
I'm less sleep-deprived now, feel normal.
I really feel wrapped up in my problems. It's not that normal kind of thing where you have to take care of yourself and sometimes put your own peace of mind first, it's where you can't take your mind off stuff and you shut stuff out because you can't handle it.
They say the worst part of sleep deprivation is not how bad you feel in the middle of it, it's that things start going bad the next day or the next.
I feel crappy and self-absorbed. Well, at least I know it now.
I have a friend at church, he was that kind of person who just walks up and introduces himself, and says hello. I was kind of suspicious at first, then realized it was all genuine, he was being himself. He's homeless now, but twice now has been promised some kind of review of his situation, is waiting for the second one to come up, so I hope they find him a place. They say the idea with getting public funds is to keep applying. And he's not a leech, he got cleaned up, is clean and sober now, just left with the consequences of whatever he did before that. So I hope he makes it.
Homeless sucks, and I would be homeless right now if my mom didn't let me live here rent free. I know when I first was homeless, I was grateful, because I didn't have to live with my mom, who just argued and argued and argued with me, would just start arguments about little stuff and infuriate me. Then I let someone push me into a job I wasn't ready for, not realizing I had a multiple personality, and schizophrenia, and etc. I was just worried about impressing the people I lived with that I was willing to work hard. I got raped at the job, repressed that memory, and got hit by a car--which was a blessing too, becuase the rape situation would have kept happening. It had happened before, and I didn't remember it.